“I do.”
“Are you mad?”
“No, I’m disappointed. I was looking forward to seeing you.”
“You’ll see me soon. Unfortunately, Kelly doesn’t have much time left.”
Landon felt like hell for making this about himself. “I wish there was more I could do for you and Stella.”
“Hearing your voice every day is what’s getting me through.”
“Did you get a chance to look at the email with the list of rentals I sent you?”
“Not yet, but I’ll do it tonight.”
“I’d like to have something ready for you and Stella when you come home.”
“That’d be great. I’ll let you know.”
“There’s one I really like that I don’t think will be available for long. It’s a farmhouse on two acres. That’d give us room for some chickens and maybe a goat or two. They said there might even be an option to buy in a couple of years if we’re interested.”
“Stella would love to have chickens and goats. She’s crazy about animals.”
“Did you tell her about Dexter and his big adventure?”
“I did. She can’t wait to meet him and Fred. She can’t believe your sister actually talks to moose. She wanted to know if she can, too.”
“I hope you told her she can do whatever she wants.”
“I told her no such thing, Landon!”
“You sound like a mom, babe.”
“Do I?” she asked softly.
“You do.”
“I love her so much. It’s killing me to see her going through this.”
“I know. She’s very lucky to have you there with her.”
“Some of Kelly’s college friends came to see her yesterday, which was nice, but Stella barely knows them. From what I can tell, Kelly focused all her energy on her daughter and her job and didn’t have a lot of close friends.”
“Stella will have a much bigger life here with us.”
“I feel so guilty,” she said in the soft whisper she used when she didn’t want Stella to overhear her. “Yearning for that life.”
“You shouldn’t feel guilty, sweetheart. You’re giving Kelly incredible peace of mind at the end of her life.”
“Yeah. But still… I miss you so much.”
“I miss you, too. More than I can say.”
“Will you still love me when this is over?”
“I’ll love you forever.”
“Thank you for that, for everything. I should go. Stella’s having a rough day. I need to check on her.”
“Call me tomorrow, and check that email.”
“I’ll do it tonight. I promise.”
Landon didn’t want to hang up. “Stay strong.”
“I’m trying. Love you.”
“Love you, too.”
He waited until he heard the click on her end before he put down the phone, rather than give in to the urge to throw it across the room. His gaze landed on the box containing the keyboard Hunter had ordered for her. Landon had planned to take it to her tomorrow, but now he wasn’t going.
Without taking the time to think about it, he picked up the phone again and called Lucas. His brother answered on the third ring, sounding out of breath.
“What’re you doing?”
“None of your business. Why?”
“Never mind.” He’d been about to ask if he could come over, but he wasn’t going near there if they were getting busy.
“What’s up, Landon?”
“Amanda said it would be better if I didn’t go to New York tomorrow.”
“Oh damn.”
“Yeah.”
“You want to come over?”
“Not if you’re in bed with Dani.”
Lucas laughed. “I’m not. I was lifting weights.”
“Should you be doing that?”
“Shut up, Mom. I’m fine, and if I don’t do something physical, I’m going to lose my shit.”
“You mind if I come by?” Landon asked, wincing at the needy tone of his voice.
“Course not. We’re not doing anything.”
“You want me to bring pizza?”
“I’d never say no to that.”
“Cool. I’ll see you soon.” Landon called in the pizza order to Kingdom Pizza, adding the house salad that Dani liked, and picked it up twenty minutes later. He arrived at Dani’s thirty minutes after he hung up with Lucas.
“That was fast,” Luc said when he came to the door looking more like his old self than he had since the fire.
“Helps to have something to do. Where’s Dani?”
“Giving Savvy a bath.” Luc took the pizza and led Landon to the kitchen. He got out plates and silverware. “Thanks for bringing dinner.”
“You’re helping me more than I’m helping you.”
“What’s going on?”
“I’m in this strange hell of hoping for someone I barely know to die already so I can have my girlfriend back, which makes me feel like a total asshole, because of course I don’t want Kelly to die.”
“But she’s going to regardless.”
“Yeah, it’s a very weird spot to be in.”
“It is, for everyone involved.”
“It’s heartbreaking.” Landon rubbed the spot in his chest that had begun to ache the minute he left Amanda in New York and hadn’t let up since. “I just have this horrible feeling that everything with Amanda is going to get fucked up somehow.”
“That’s not going to happen.”
“How can you be so sure?”
“For some reason that no one can fathom, she seems to actually love you.”
“Nice. That’s just what I need right now.”
Lucas cracked up laughing. “I’m just busting your balls, and you know it. Listen, I’ve been where you are. I was flat on my ass in love with Dani, and she was saying she needed time to be on her own before we moved forward. So I gave her time, but it was torturous to keep my distance from her when all I wanted was to keep her close.”
“I remember.”
“It’s going to work out with Amanda. You just have to be patient and give her space to breathe during the tragedy she’s helping her daughter through. There’s no quick fix on something like that. Dani would tell you that.”
“What would I tell him?” Dani asked when she joined them with Savvy wrapped in a frog towel.
The baby let out a squeak and reached for Lucas while giving Landon a freaked-out look.
Lucas laughed at the face she made. “She still can’t understand why there’s someone else who looks just like her Lu.”
Savannah hid her face in Lucas’s shoulder.
“That’s so funny,” Dani said, laughing. “You need to grow your hair long for her, Landon. Anything to make you look different from Lucas.”
“I’ll get right on that.”
“So what were you talking about?” Dani asked as she helped herself to salad and pizza and joined them at the table. “And thanks for the salad, Landon.”
“Welcome.”
Lucas filled her in on the latest with Amanda while Landon forced a few bites past the lump in his throat.