So she followed Skye into the back room, where Ria was supposed to be working. She wasn’t working. She was lounging in the one comfortable chair in the room, and she jerked upright at their entrance. “I wasn’t napping!”
Madeline couldn’t help but laugh. “That would be more convincing if we hadn’t caught you doing exactly that.”
“Well, maybe I was closing my eyes for just a minute.” Ria flashed a quick smile. “I got up way too early this morning for a pickup since Fitz couldn’t—” She broke off midsentence. “What’s the matter?”
“See, I told you it was obvious something was bothering you,” Skye said, jumping up to sit on the edge of one of the worktables. “Now tell us.”
Madeline looked from one of them to the other. She wanted to explain but didn’t know where to begin. She hadn’t even told them she’d been seeing Ken for the past month, and she suddenly felt incredibly guilty about keeping that secret from them.
“Does this have something to do with your rebound fling?” Ria asked slowly.
Madeline froze for a moment. Then nodded.
Ria’s dark eyes were thoughtful. Knowing. “Jacob mentioned a conversation he had this morning. Was he putting the pieces together correctly?”
“What conversation?” Skye asked, frowning and obviously displeased about being the last to know.
“Yes,” Madeline admitted, relieved at having an easy segue into the truth. “He put the pieces together right.” Sighing, she turned to Skye and explained, “Jacob was talking to Ken this morning, and I guess Ken wouldn’t tell him who he’d been seeing for the past month. Because it’s supposed to be a secret. Because he’s been seeing me.”
It wasn’t as bad as she’d thought it would be, saying it out loud.
“He’s been seeing you?” Skye repeated slowly. “Ken? Ken Harley?” Her eyes grew bigger and bigger as awareness caught up to her until they were as wide and round as Madeline had ever seen them.
Madeline’s cheeks were hot, but she managed to keep her expression composed. “Yeah. We’ve been... having a thing.”
“But he’s...” Skye didn’t finish the thought. Ria had obviously had some preparation for this news, but Skye hadn’t. She was visibly shocked.
“He’s what?” Ridiculously, Madeline felt defensive. Almost protective of Ken. “He’s a good guy.”
“Of course he’s a good guy! He’s a great guy. But he’s... he’s...”
“He’s not that old. He’s only about ten years older than us. He’s just thirty-six. He’s not too old.”
“I didn’t say he was too old. I don’t think he’s old at all. But he’s...” Skye looked over to Ria for help, but Ria obviously didn’t know what she was trying to say.
“He’s pretty hot. At least I think he is.” Madeline wished she didn’t sound so defensive.
“He’s smoking hot,” Skye said. “I’ve always thought so. But he’s... Sheriff!”
Madeline giggled stupidly as she finally realized what the roadblock was for Skye. “Yeah. I know that. But that doesn’t have anything to do with how we’re together. I never thought about him like this before. Not at all. Not until about a month ago. Then it sort of hit us out of the blue. I don’t know where it came from, but both of us felt it.”
“So you’re really dating Ken Harley?” Ria asked softly, almost gently.
“No!” The word burst out a little louder than Madeline intended. “I mean, we’re not dating. We’ve been sleeping together, but it’s casual. Just casual. Exactly like I told you before. It’s just a rebound fling. It’s not going to go anywhere. Both of us know it. We’re just... we’re just having fun for a while.”
Ria licked her lips, obviously hesitating before she said the next thing. “Are you sure that’s all it is? Because Ken strikes me as a pretty old-fashioned guy. He doesn’t take relationships lightly. And neither do you, if you want to know the truth.”
“I know it’s not like me, but that’s why it’s been so good. I don’t have to bring all my issues and insecurities and overblown sense of responsibility. I can just... just be with him. I’ve really liked it. It feels... free.”
“That’s great then,” Skye said. “You deserve to feel free and have fun. But if that’s all it is, why are you upset today?”
“Because Ken came to tell me about his conversation with Jacob, and we ended up having a weird little argument. And, I don’t know, these casual flings have a shelf life, and I feel like we might have reached ours.”
“And you don’t want it to end?” Ria asked.
Madeline shook her head.
“Because you secretly love him?” Skye said in a stage whisper.
“No, I don’t love him! I like him, and I’m hot for him, but I don’t love him. But I’m really enjoying this. He makes me feel good about myself, and I haven’t felt that way for a long time.”
“If he makes you feel so good about yourself, then that seems like there’s potential for more than just sex.” Ria was frowning, clearly trying to understand. “Right?”
“No, it’s not right. He makes me feel good about myself because there’s not all the weight of a real relationship. If it was serious, everything would change. I don’t want it to change. I don’t want to be his girlfriend. I don’t.”
“But Ken wants it to change?”
“No. I don’t think so. I mean, he’s never said he does.” Her stomach did a few flip-flops at the possibility of Ken being discontent with what they had.
“Then what did you get in an argument about if you’re both happy with the way things are?” Skye asked.
“I don’t even know. He’s never cared as much as I have about other people knowing about us, and he wanted to know why it’s such a big deal that Jacob found out.”
“Why is it a big deal?” Ria’s voice was still careful, like she was feeling her way through a minefield.
Madeline groaned and leaned back against the table. “Why do you think it’s a big deal? If too many people find out, then the whole town will know. And he’s the sheriff! Everyone will be assuming we’re engaged or something, and then they’ll all be talking about me and analyzing me and wondering what the hell he sees in me and then debating about what we’re even doing together. It would be horrible. A casual fling could never stand up against the force of that kind of gossip. I can’t do it. I won’t do it. If everyone finds out, it will be over. And I don’t want it to be over yet.” She was babbling and couldn’t seem to stop. She bit her lip and took a few deep breaths, willing the tears out of her voice and eyes.
It didn’t work. A couple of them streamed out, sliding down her cheeks and plopping onto her shirt.
“Oh no, Madeline,” Skye said, scooting over so she could wrap an arm around her shoulders. “It’s not that bad. It’s not going to be like that.”
“How do you know?”
“Because right now only I, Ria, and Jacob know. Right?”