I shook my head. “No, and I don’t even think he’d accept my help right now. He can barely stand to be in my presence.”
I thought of my last disastrous meeting with him. I’d invited him over for tea and cakes with Caly to mediate between us. At first, I’d had such hope, he’d been calm and seemed like he was trying. But then Caly had mentioned an issue with a recently deceased maiden in Elysia who was crying every night of a broken heart because she couldn’t bear to be separated from her mortal and living lover and something in Eros had just snapped. I’d never seen him so angry, growling at Caly and calling her and Hades heartless bastards for not restoring her soul to the land of the living. Which was obviously not possible. The dead stayed dead. That’s how life worked. We were not in charge of the strings of fate anyway, the fates were. He’d known that. But he’d been almost animalistic in his fury and not knowing what to do or so I’d simply stared at him in shock. Fully expecting my friend to go ape on him and maybe turn him into a pretzel for his daring to speak to her in such a manner, but she hadn’t. She’d simply let him speak his peace. I’d never seen her so calm in the face of such obvious fury.
Then Eros had simply vanished and neither of us knowing what to say had independently decided there was nothing to say. We’d not talked about that afternoon and no matter how much I reached out to my son to see him; he’d refused all my calls.
He thinned his eyes. “I’ve been mated to you long enough to know that look in your eyes, little dove. What have you got planned?”
I shrugged. “I don’t know that I’ve got anything planned, Hephy. Honest. More like the first inkling of an idea. That is all.”
He stared at me for a long moment, before finally sighing heavily, leaning in and tenderly kissing my forehead. Pressing his lips firmly to my flesh, as though he could hang onto me forever by doing so.
I understood what this was, what he was doing. I’d not been home in so long, he’d missed me. As I’d missed him. He was also worried for me, as was often his way where I was concerned. This Hephy was slightly different than the version of my timeline had been. That one had understood my reckless and sometimes wildly independent streak, he’d seen my growth and maturity through the ages. But the Hephy of this time didn’t have the benefit of time behind him. He’d only known me, truly known me, for a year. He was learning me, just as that Hephy had, but I understood that it would take time before we got back into the same comfortable rhythm we’d shared once before.
His look was studious, but also patient and understanding. “I don’t claim to understand the way your brilliant mind works, my dear, but I trust in you. And daily that trust grows. If you believe that there is naught to be done where Eros is concerned, I believe you.”
Heart feeling as though it overflowed with love and warmth, I grabbed his hands and brought them close to my breasts, clutching tightly to them. “I love that you have such belief in me, Hephy, I do. But I fear that in this I don’t quite share in your convictions. I don’t know what I’m doing where Eros is concerned.”
He squeezed my hands once before gently easing out from my grip and he once again wrapped his strong arms around my waist. Holding me loosely. I clung to his wide shoulders.
“Then why don’t we table this conversation for now. We revisit things in a year’s time? Maybe.” He shrugged. “Maybe it’s just your fears talking and has nothing to do with Eros at all. You haven’t been a mother to him in this life but a year. Just as I’ve had to learn you, you’re having to learn him. Be gentle with yourself, my dove. Trust and love take time to build. Eros is a smart boy. He surely sees that you are not that same woman of before. Someday he will learn to trust in you. As I do.”
I swallowed hard, knowing that Hephy was making so much sense. But a sense of deep failure gripped me tight. “I know you’re right, husband.” I sighed. “I know. I can’t fix that woman’s mistakes in a year, maybe not even ten. Gods, is it horrible of me to say that I hate her? Though she was me, I hate—”
He shook his head, and gazing deep into my eyes said with all the conviction of his heart, “You and she might have shared looks, but you are not the same woman. I love you, Aphrodite. I never liked her. She was everything that was wrong in this world. You are her complete antithesis. Understand that.”
Leaning in, I kissed him. Gently, just a whisper of mouth upon mouth. But soon I was stroking his beloved lips with my own, sliding my tongue along the seam of his and silently urging him to let me in. Which he did. Without question.
We made love; it was slow. And tender. Full of unspoken emotions and passion. I cried at one point, recognizing how very blessed I was that he’d finally seen me. I’d been in a very dark place when I’d imagined my life without him. He simply held me and allowed me to feel the moment. The joy of our union.
When it was done, I felt my world at ease once again. He was right. He always was. Eros would eventually come around. He had to. He had to see that I was a different woman, one who desperately wanted to be his mother. His true mother. One that he could depend on. Count on. One who would hold back the gates of Tartarus itself to ensure his safety above all else. Hephy had eventually seen I’d changed. My son would have to acknowledge that change soon.
I closed my eyes, cuddling into my gentle giant’s side and smiled my first real smile of the night. This nightmare would soon be over. I’d have my family restored back to me. We would be one big happy family.
No doubt in my mind.
Hephaestus
She slept.
Finally.
Her sleep had been fleeting at best the past several nights. My female hardly ate. All she did was worry. About me. About her children. Our newborn. She wanted to be seen as the woman she was today, not the nightmare her other self had been.
Recognizing the fact that this woman in my arms and the one I’d once known were two completely opposite individuals with different souls hadn’t come easily to me. In fact, I’d almost lost the single best thing I’d ever know in my life. If not for that damned divorce proceedings I would never have recognized the truth. I’d had the benefit of seeing my female’s true motives and heart, but Eros hadn’t gone to the trial. Not that I blamed him. Her son hadn’t had an easy road when it had come to the other Aphrodite.
That female had been petty. Vindictive. And just downright evil. I didn’t think she’d honestly known how to show love, or affection. Even for the one thing I think in her twisted mind she did actually care for. Her children with Ares. Of which there were many. But her bond with Eros had been stronger than with the other children. They’d still been young enough to have forgotten much of what she’d done and forgiven her for the rest.
Eros, though, had been her firstborn. She’d leaned heavily on him. Using him often as her gopher. Their relationship had been a twisted and complicated affair. She would kill anyone who dared tried to harm him, and yet she’d probably hurt him more than anyone else alive.
She’d kept him to herself, rarely letting him off the dog leash, or allowing him to get out of her sight unless she ordered him to kill one of her many countless enemies. He hadn’t had friends. And I highly doubted he’d had lovers, considering how tightly she’d kept him under lock and key.