So what?
In their eyes, they could bother me, scare me, and that was enough for the moment.
And trust me, they were good at their job.
I packed up my bag and threw it over my shoulder like I was in my early twenties again, getting ready to hit the road, not knowing where I was working, singing, or sleeping that night.
“You can stay,” Jess said.
“I’m good,” I said. “We better get to work.”
“Want to warm up our singing voices?” Jess asked with a smirk.
“You’re a bitch,” I said.
I followed Jess to a little boutique in a quiet part of the city.
That’s where we always met.
Sasha’s best friend - Marianne - owned the place.
The back room was really big, which gave us all space to get dressed for the day.
It was another fun day of pinstripes and laughs ahead.
Rae was late.
Because Rae was always late.
We were all dressed when Rae came through the front door with the biggest pair of sunglasses on her face I’d ever seen.
“Hitting it hard last night?” Sasha yelled into her ear.
“Ew, fuck you,” Rae said.
“I’m going to have a cigarette,” Jess said.
“Spray yourself with perfume when you’re done,” Sasha said.
“Yes, Mom,” Jess said as she walked to the front door of the boutique.
“Hey,” Sasha said to me, grabbing my arm. “How much do you love me?”
“Why?”
“What are you doing later?”
“I don’t know.”
“We should hang out.”
“Hang out?”
“Yeah,” Sasha said.
“Your version of hanging out is whoring yourself to anyone who will listen to you sing.”
“Right,” Sasha said. “Buuuut… this time it’s really good.”
“Really good?”
“I got us a gig.”
“Us? The four of us?”
“Just you and me,” Sasha said.
“Hell no,” I said.
“What?”
“Are you kidding me? That’s a bad move. Really bad move. You can’t do that to the other two. It’ll ruin this. It’ll ruin our friendships.”
“You’re such a good person, Abby,” Sasha said.
“No. I’m not. I’ve just been through it before. Being left on the side of the road…”
Quite literally.
“Okay,” Sasha said. “You’re right. Forget about it.”
Sasha turned and I grabbed for her hand. “What was it for?”
“Studio time,” she said. “Real studio time. We were asked for specifically. You. Me. More you than me.”
“How…?”
“I whore myself out, remember?” Sasha asked. “And you have the best voice out of all of us. I know you were kind of popular at one time. I know you hate singing like this. But I don’t know why you don’t try to do more.”
“So you’re going to do it for me?” I asked.
“No,” Sasha said. “We have to go sing. Then they’re going to choose two or three singers.”
“Out of how many?”
“I don’t know,” she said. “You don’t want to do it, remember?”
“Do what?” Rae asked as she appeared from the back of the boutique, fully dressed.
“The singing gig,” Sasha said.
“Why wouldn’t you do it?” Rae asked.
“It’s stabbing you and Jess in the back.”
“What? No. Sasha already told us about it.”
“You did?” I asked Sasha.
“Yeah,” Sasha said with a laugh. “I’m not a bitch.”
I looked to the front of the boutique and watched Jess flick her cigarette away.
She came back inside.
“How long did you know?” I called out to her.
“You told her?” Jess asked.
“Yeah,” Sasha said. “She’s afraid she’s going to hurt your feelings.”
“Oh, fuck,” Jess said. “Be greedy, Abby. Sasha showed videos of us singing. Okay? Whoever is making this decision said you and Sasha had the voices of the group. So go with it.”
“Are you sure?” I asked.
“You deserve it,” Rae said. “You’re a really good singer. You’re kind of the lead singer of our group.”
I looked at Sasha. She nodded. “I’m sure they’re bringing me in as a favor. I won’t get it. But you will.”
“What exactly am I singing? Or who am I singing with? For?” I asked.
“I guess we’re going to find out,” Sasha said.
“Right now?” I asked.
“No,” Sasha said. “We have to go sing for Mackenzie. She’s turning nine today.”
“Little bitch,” Rae muttered. “When I was nine, my father left to go live with his girlfriend.”
“Need a tissue?” Jess asked.
“Not funny,” Rae said.
“It kind of is,” I said with a wink.
“What did your father do for your ninth birthday, Abby?” Rae asked.
“Died,” I said.
Rae shut her eyes. “Shit. Sorry.”
“Don’t be,” I said. “It was a long time ago.”
“Okay, let’s get going,” Sasha said. “I’m sorry to everyone who has Daddy issues.”
“You’re one to talk,” Jess said. “You call whoever you’re sleeping with Daddy.”
Sasha’s face blushed a little. “I’m never getting drunk and talking about my sex life with you again.”
“Oh, I want to hear this,” I said.
“Hey, Sasha, when you’re done fucking him, do you ask for money to go to the mall?” Rae asked.
We all started to laugh.
Even Sasha.
We left the boutique and Jess was at my side.
She nudged me with her elbow.
“You better fucking do this,” she whispered to me. “And you better be awesome. And when you’re rich and famous, pay those crazy people off and then buy me something nice.”
I force a smile. “Deal.”
“Shit, we’re going to be late,” Sasha said to me.
Singing to sweet, little Mackenzie turned out to be a pain in the ass.
She was shy, then upset, then shy again. We ended up singing to her three times. Just to make her happy.
Of course, we were paid for our time. Plus gratuity.
I felt like a fool the entire time, but cash was cash.
There was nothing quite like being laughed at just to make enough money to afford two meals and some gas.
“Just follow me,” Sasha said as she ran toward the building.
It was actually kind of cool though… running toward a recording studio.
My heart fluttered a little. My mind kept that under control.
This wasn’t anything real or serious.
Best case, I’d get to sing on a song or something.
Maybe make a little money.
The true hope was to get recognized.
Have some big wig executive or record producer hear me and then want to sign me.