“That is a problem. And one that’s probably not resolved easily. But, honey, I don’t think avoiding Jason is the answer.”
“Probably not. But I need some space to sort out my thoughts. My feelings. Every time I get close to Jason it’s like everything inside of me . . . short-circuits.”
Alice laughed. “That’s not necessarily a bad thing.”
Erin quirked a smile. “Okay, not a terrible thing. But it is if I’m trying to think clearly.”
“I don’t know,” Alice said with a slight shrug. “It sounds like you might be falling in love. Is that so bad?”
Was it? She didn’t know. Maybe because she was trying to have a fling, not fall in love. And what the hell did she really know about falling in love? She’d thought she was in love with Owen. She’d been so wrong.
So was she really falling in love with Jason, or was this another round of lust and fun and infatuation and the romance of it all? Or was it hiding her feelings of rejection and turning them into something that wasn’t even real? How was she supposed to know when she wasn’t thinking with a clear head?
Until she could sort it out logically, gain some perspective, she had to keep her distance.
But it sure helped to have Alice’s counsel.
The party lasted until early evening, and then everyone headed out. Alice had to pack and Clay and his dad and some of the hands from the ranch had to see to the cattle.
Alice and Clay thanked them for the party.
“We owe you a big one,” Clay said, shaking everyone’s hands and hugging Erin, Brenna and Honor, who he’d always treated like sisters.
“I’ll talk to you when I get back,” Alice said.
“When you get back? I’ll be texting you next week. I have some dress ideas.”
Alice giggled. “Fantastic.”
Everyone disappeared after the guests of honor left. Everyone except Jason, who lingered at the barn while Erin supervised the cleanup from her position at the entrance to the barn. Of course, the crew they’d hired had it all under control and she really didn’t need to be there. She still just felt . . . unsettled. And having Jason standing only inches away from her wasn’t helping to settle her.
“You’ve been avoiding me today,” he said, leaning against the doorway, his thumb hooked in his belt buckle in the most natural, sexy way, which disturbed her greatly.
“I was busy.”
“No, you were avoiding me. Wanna tell me why?”
“I’ve got a lot on my mind, Jason, and it can’t always be about you.”
“So what you’re saying is I’m on your mind a lot?”
She’d laugh if she wasn’t so miserable. “I’m tired.”
He pushed off the wall and came over, stopping in front of her. He smoothed her hair away from her face with his fingers. Just that modicum of touch was enough to send her senses haywire. Then his fingers trailed down her temple and across her cheek until his thumb brushed her bottom lip.
Every part of her quivered with awareness. She wanted him to kiss her. She didn’t want him to kiss her.
“You do look tired,” he said, taking a step back. “You should get some rest, babe.”
She’d never been more relieved. Or more regretful.
“Good night, Erin.”
She watched him walk away, her body—her entire soul—still vibrating from his touch.
Damn.
CHAPTER
twenty-six
BATHROOM WAS FINISHED, painting had been done, all that was left was putting the flooring in the bedroom. Finn had offered to come over to lend a hand tonight, as he had on a few other occasions during this project. Jason was glad for any help he could get. In return, Jason offered to toss some steaks on the grill and supply all the beer Finn wanted.
“These are good floors, man,” Finn said as they were nearly three-quarters done with the bedroom.
They’d taken a time-out to drink some water and stretch, because laying floors was backbreaking work, especially when you’d already put in a full day’s work on your regular job.
“I plan to lay the same hardwoods down the hall so they match the ones that I’ve laid throughout the entire house. So I’m almost there.”
“It’s lookin’ fine.” Finn looked it over. “Not too dark or light, just the right color. And the grain has those grooves that’ll wear well.”
“Thanks. I thought it was a good choice, especially with Puddy and his nails.”
Speaking of Puddy, he currently sat between Jason and Finn, his ball in his mouth, waiting for someone to play with him.
“Soon as we’re done here, buddy. When we’re grilling we’ll throw the ball.”
“He’s a good boy.”
“Yeah, he is,” Jason said. “You should get a dog.”
“Erin’s dog Agatha is like the vineyard dog now. Keeps us all on our toes. Besides, I only have the one-room cabin on the grounds. Not like my own place.”
He could listen to Finn talk in that Irish accent all night long. Even though Finn had been in the US since he was eighteen, he hadn’t lost that lilt to his voice.
“You thinking about moving out?”
Finn shrugged. “The Bellinis are the only family I have now. Maureen’s like my mum. When I’m ready to settle down I’ll move on. For now, I have the cabin and it’s convenient. Far enough away from the main house to give me some privacy, and close enough that I can walk to the vineyard.”
Jason’s lips curved. “It’s a damn good cabin, right there near the pond.”
“Yeah. Good fishin’ there.”
Jason finished off his water, so they got back to work. Within an hour they had the rest of the floor done. Damn, it was good to have that project finished. It was great having Finn there. He worked his ass off, didn’t slack off on the job or bullshit around. When there was work to be done, it got done well and fast.
They washed up and Jason pulled a couple of beers out of the fridge, handing one to Finn. The cold brew was just what Jason needed after that hot, sweaty job.
Jason grabbed the steaks and some corn on the cob, put them on a plate, and covered the plate to keep the flies away. They went outside and he fired up the grill.
“Thanks for your help,” he said, tilting his bottle toward Finn.
“Happy to do it.”
“I hope I didn’t take you away from something important.”
Finn laughed. “If I’d had something more important to do, I’d have said no.”
One of the reasons Jason liked Finn was his brutal honesty. The guy wouldn’t lie about anything even if it hurt your feelings.
“Besides, someday I’ll have my own house and I’ll have to do all this shit. So you taught me a few things.”
“I doubt there’s much I can teach you. You know woodwork, you know your way around a saw and hammer, and when you’re not doing that you’re making your own whiskey. Is there anything you can’t do?”
Finn pondered the question for a bit while he drank his beer. “I dunno. I’ll try just about anything. Though my grandad once had me help him put up a roof when I was a lad. Hated that. Hot as fuck up there.”