It had not been easy for either of us, her more so. Adrianna had been brokenhearted when we filled the prescription for the first time. She had blamed herself for the pregnancy she lost all those years ago, saying it was her fault she was unable to conceive naturally. I had kissed her all damn night and let her cry on me until she fell asleep, and when she woke with fresh tears the next morning, I stayed right where I was and held her until she stopped shaking. It had fucking devastated me to see her like that, but I stayed strong because she needed me. I owed my wife everything for the life she gave me. If she had wanted a baby, then I would move mountains to give her one.
Weeks had gone by and she began to feel inadequate as a woman, that something was missing from her. I had told her she was crazy and to calm down because she was perfect the way she was—biggest mistake I ever made as a husband. The moment I had said to calm down, she exploded.
Apparently, women did not like to hear those two words together.
We had considered adoption from Russia—her idea—but I was not ready to give up on having our own children one day, even if we were only granted one. I had never wanted little hellions until Adrianna had put the idea in my head. Now I cannot imagine my life without them. I wanted a plethora of them.
"Daddy! Throw me in the air," Nastia demanded, her red ringlets falling in front of her eyes.
"Me too, Daddy!" Svetlana, Nastia's twin, screamed like a hyena in my ear.
I winced, going deaf for a split second.
Yes, twins.
Both my wife and I were still perplexed over it. We knew twins were a strong possibility because of Sophia combined with the potency of the fertility drugs, but we did not anticipate them.
"Again, Daddy!" Nastia said, elbowing her sister out of the way.
"How are you feeling?" I asked and stood up. I gave the kids one last toss each in the air. "Girls, go change and warm up." They dashed off. They loved gymnastics.
Adrianna's dreamy smile took my breath away as she peered up at me. I fucking loved this woman. The light was shining through the large window showcasing the dusting of freckles across the bridge of her nose. The older she got, the more pronounced they became. I wrapped my arm around her shoulder and held her close to me.
"Great? Amazing? Wonderful?" She smiled bigger, then yawned. "I slept most of the day. Thanks for taking Lili for me."
"Malysh, I am not taking Lili for you. She is my daughter too."
She pouted and I had the urge to kiss her lips deep.
"I know. I just feel bad because you have to work."
I shook my head. "You know World Cup is family. We rotated events—I took her to vault, Danilo took her on floor, Madeline had her on bars, then she ended on balance beam with me."
She grinned, and her eyes lit up. It was the little things we found satisfaction in now.
Madeline and Danilo had phoned me one night explaining that they wanted to expand World Cup, and that they wanted me to come back and coach. They had sweetened the proposal by allowing me to buy my way back into the gym. I countered back with adding Adrianna to the offer.
When I had returned to World Cup with my wife, I was placed under scrutiny. They had no idea we were married, let alone together. It did not faze me one bit, and I had answered every question they asked. I was proud of us and refused to hide what I felt for Adrianna ever again. I knew how it looked, we had heard it all, but that was then, and this was now.
Adrianna, on the other hand, did not have the same reaction. She had been uncomfortable, edgy, like everyone looked at her with disapproving eyes.
It was not until she had become pregnant with our first daughter that everyone had a change of heart. The whole gym shifted and we suddenly became one big family. They saw her go through the emotions of longing to have a child and failing, how her chances had been so slim. They saw how she leaned on me, how I cradled her when she was finally pregnant. They saw how strong our love was during one of the hardest times for us, and it had lifted the curtain for them.
"Need any help today?" she asked eagerly.
I knew where she was going with this. "I got it covered."
Her eyes dropped and a laugh rumbled in my chest. "Tell me you love me." I demanded, my eyes penetrating hers.
"Never," she said with a smile on her face. "Come on, Coach, let me help a bit. It's not like I'm asking to make a comeback. Maybe if you let me help, I'll make it worth your while and we can go into your office like old times…"
She loved to be in the gym as much as I did.
"Go put your feet up in my office. Call a friend or buy some shit online. But I do not want to hear that your blood pressure dropped again or see you rushed off to the hospital."
Her eyes flared. "That was one time, three pregnancies ago."
"And I never want to relive that moment."
Her eyes dropped lower now. Just as I was about to add something else, I saw Svetlana, or as Nastia called her, Lana, stop walking and drop her head. I peered around Adrianna and frowned as I watched her stand alone in her metallic pink leotard. She balled her tiny hands in her mouth, her creamy fingers twisting against her teeth. She was our little pixie of a girl with untamable red curls and sabal eyes. Svetlana was noticeably smaller than her twin.
I nodded with my chin and we both looked at her.
"Svetlana, idi syuda I skazhi mne, chto ne tak."
My children understood both Russian and English, at my wife's request.
Her little feet padded across the floor. Svetlana glanced up with tears shimmering in her innocent eyes.
"What's wrong?" my wife asked, handing me Lili before kneeling down.
We had a rule. When one of the girls needed us, we would give them our undivided attention, if we were capable in the moment, of course. Between their close ages and female emotions, we did not want them to feel we favored one over the other.
I also was trying to prevent meltdowns before they happened. That was a lot of female hormones under one roof.
"I do not want to do the bawance beam." Her little voice squeaked.
I had a good chuckle over her lack of contractions. Every once in a while, my kids sounded like me and I found it hysterical. Now I understood why Adrianna made jokes about it.
"It is scary. Can I just do the other ones and not that one today?"
"Are you still thinking about when you slipped off yesterday?" Adrianna responded, and Svetlana nodded, her chin staying tight to her chest.
Reaching for her, my wife picked up Svetlana and cradled her to her hip. She sniffled and placed her thumb in her mouth. Normally I was against Adrianna picking up the children while she was pregnant, unless it was Lili, but I never said anything when it came to Svetlana.
Her muscle tone had been very weak since she was born. She had to be supported for a solid two years by us holding up her and her neck. Adrianna and I had worked diligently with our daughter to build muscle tone through play.
Doctors firmly believed that Svetlana's hypotonia was actually caused by muscular dystrophy.
Svetlana had no idea gymnastics was more about rehabilitation for her than the actual sport. We did not want to push her to do the balance beam. We both had agreed that if our kids did not want to play the sport, then they did not have to, but for Svetlana who actually liked gymnastics, it was part of her therapy. We gave her a nudge on all the events. She needed gymnastics to live.