Our department knew far more about the enemy than we’d acted upon. We were only given authority to strike in certain limited situations, but we knew all about their camps and their numbers. We knew who their officers were and how they liked their coffee. The general we’d killed a week earlier? I knew exactly who he reported to and where that man lived. It would be easy to walk up to him and rip his heart straight from his chest, but that was the problem—it would be too easy.
I ran by my house and collected every weapon and supply I might need, then found a cheap apartment to set up my base of operations. What I was doing would end my career and possibly get me killed, but I didn’t care. If the other side had no scruples, then neither would I.
For two weeks, I raided enemy weapon stores, killing whoever was present. I needed the firepower, but I also figured it would be poetic justice to kill them with their own weapons.
After that, I set out on a methodical manhunt, working my way up the enemy chain of command. When I came across my old neighbor for a second time, he received no mercy. By the time I stood face-to-face with the senior leader who was calling the shots, the raging fires of revenge had devoured me, leaving an entirely new creature standing in the ashes of who I used to be.
While I would have liked to have killed them all, even in my most enraged moments, I knew that wasn’t possible. Once I was satisfied with my body count, I planned my escape. The Mossad was an independent agency, but my actions were unauthorized. I was subject to prosecution under the penal code just like any other Israeli citizen. There was no way I was going to prison for killing scum terrorists.
Two weeks later, I used a fake passport to immigrate to the United States, where I could create a new life for myself. My past would always be a part of me, but I could never be the idealistic man I’d been before Aliza’s death. Instead, I would welcome the man I’d become by harnessing the ruthless violence and embracing my power to do what so few could—bring evil to its knees, one merciless kill at a time.
Chapter 17
Emily
A cyclone of emotions picked me up and spun me in every direction as I listened to his story. I had known he was a killer, but to hear that he’d gone rogue and annihilated an entire battalion of enemy soldiers was entirely different. Unpredictable. Homicidal. At the same time, my heart broke for the excruciating guilt and anguish he must have felt at discovering his sister dead.
My siblings meant the world to me, so if I’d been in his shoes, I wasn’t sure I wouldn’t have done the same thing. I worried every night when I went to sleep whether they were being taken care of properly. When I first decided to leave, I had to carefully consider whether my actions would be taken out on them. Whether they would be used to get back at me. My father was far from Father of the Year, but I had to hope and pray that, at the very least, he would keep my brother and sister safe.
“I’m so sorry,” I whispered. As my emotions settled, I realized that the overwhelming sentiment that remained was sorrow. My heart ached for what Tamir had lived through.
“It was my own fault. My punishment for not following orders when I allowed my old neighbor to live. I won’t grieve my career; it was over anyway. My loyalty was to my family, as it should have been. I don’t regret one thing I did to avenge my sister.”
“Yes, but you also can’t blame yourself for her death.” I placed my hand on the table and sat forward, horrified that he would carry around that kind of guilt. “You were showing a man compassion, and he ratted you out to his superiors. He’s the one responsible—he and whoever killed her—not you.”
The firelight from the stove glinted off the obsidian shards in his eyes, and the corners of his mouth twitched. “I appreciate your perspective, but I see it differently. Regardless, I’ve walked through the fire and come out stronger on the other end.”
I smiled softly. “‘A certain darkness is needed to see the stars.’ That’s what my tita used to say.”
“She was a wise yet highly superstitious woman,” he teased as he sipped from his glass. “I would have liked to have met her.”
“You know what? I think she would have liked you, Tamir …” I paused. “Wait a minute. If you used a fake passport to get over here, does that mean your real name isn’t Tamir?”
“Technically? No, it isn’t.”
“Well, what was your name?”
He stared at me for a solid minute. Until I could almost feel him sifting through the thoughts in my head. “Does it really matter? I’m not that man anymore.”
I thought about what he said and realized that, regardless of whether my license read Reyes, Ramirez, or Rogers, I was still the same person. “No, I guess it doesn’t.” I sat for several minutes, absorbing everything I’d learned. He’d lived an extraordinary life before coming to the States, and now, his life was far simpler.
“Was it hard letting go of that life? Becoming an instructor and giving up years of a military lifestyle?” I’d heard that integrating back into society could be difficult for ex-military.
Maybe it was just the flickering light of the stove, but an ominous shadow seemed to cross his features.
“Actually, the transition was rather seamless.” His eyes broke our connection and dropped to the glass in his hand.
“Is the Israeli government still searching for you?”
“There are still warrants out for my arrest, but no one is actively looking for me. So long as I stay under their radar, I shouldn’t be at risk. I think that’s enough story time for one night. It’s time to get some rest.” He stood and walked to the kitchen sink, effectively ending our conversation.
I felt like something had bothered him, but I wasn’t sure which part. He was generally very even-tempered. It wasn’t like him to be mercurial, but we all had our moments, so I didn’t press him.
An hour later, as I lay snuggled on the sofa under a pile of blankets, I felt my outlook shift. Tamir’s story had confirmed he was a dangerous man, but it had also explained the odd feeling of safety I got when I was around him. He might have disagreed with my assessment of him, but I was starting to believe the beautiful soul of a worthy man was tucked deep beneath his stoic, harsh exterior.
Would a man, who loved so deeply as he had loved his sister, hurt me for no reason? Surely, not. Knowing what I now knew about his past, I felt even more confident he truly was there to help me. A dizzying realization settled over me that there was a chance, no matter how small, I just might survive my ordeal unscathed.
For the first time in ages, I fell asleep with a smile on my lips and a lightness in my heart.
***
The next morning, I woke to the thunk of Tamir chopping wood outside the cabin. The sun was well into the sky, making it probably close to nine in the morning. I had to guess at the time because I refused to turn my phone on. I’d seen enough movies to know that phones could be used to gather information about me.
After rolling out of bed and tidying up the blankets, I headed to the bathroom to get dressed for the day. Back home, I always showered in the morning, but after only a day and a half at the cabin, it was quickly clear to me that showers in the wilderness were an evening activity. There was no way I could go to sleep covered in sweat and dirt from a day in the forest, and I certainly wasn’t about to take a second freezing shower in the morning. One a day was plenty.