Lyric is objectively hot, and he has the voice.
A tapping on the glass between the studio and the control room breaks my Lyric-infused daze.
Cash cocks his head at me.
Oh shit, we’re recording.
I hit Stop and press the button for the intercom between the rooms. “Sorry about that. I got distracted. Let’s go again.”
He hangs up his headphones.
The rock star that is Cash Kingsley stalks toward me like he usually does after we’re finished for the day, and I know what he’s thinking.
“We’re not done yet,” I say as soon as he’s through the connecting door.
“I think we are. You’re not exactly here.” He leans against my desk, and our legs press against each other. “What’s up?”
His hand brushes over mine. It’s a small move but an open invitation.
I don’t take it. “Nothing’s up. It’s all good. But if we’re done …” I stand to put distance between us.
He follows me out of the control room and into the office.
Now what, Ryder?
“Seriously, what’s with you?” Cash steps closer, his deep brown eyes holding confusion.
“Nothing. Just an off day. I’ll be okay.”
He keeps coming closer, and my body feels the need to back up.
We do this dance until I’m flat against my office wall and Cash is boxing me in.
“Want me to make it better? You know how good it was the last time.”
“The only time. And my kid is here.”
“Her manny is with her.”
I don’t like the derisive way he says manny. Like it’s a crime to be a male nanny. It must show in my eyes because he steps back with a laugh.
“Oh, I get it. That’s your problem.”
“What’s my problem?”
“You wanna get with your hired help.”
“I don’t,” I protest. Maybe a little too vehemently.
“Uh-huh. Sure. When we passed him on our way in here, I thought my dream man was brought to life right there. He’s hot. Like hotter than hot. He’s, like—”
“Lyric’s straight.” Why did I say that when I know it’s not true?
“Damn.”
“Yeah, real shame.”
“Guess we’re rescheduling the session?” Cash asks.
“Yeah, sorry. We’ll tell the label we had to cancel this one for whatever reason. We can blame Kaylee. Tell them she was sick. It’s the best thing about having kids—they get you out of a lot.”
“Even a love life, it seems.”
Kaylee was the excuse I gave him when I told him I didn’t want a repeat, and while it was true then, something has shifted. I don’t know what, but blaming Kaylee for my lack of interest in Cash feels like a lie now.
I’m not interested in him because he’s not …
Lyric’s image flashes through my head, and I groan.
I thought I was getting a hold on this crush thing. We’ve been working well together. I’ve been keeping professional distance.
It’s been good, damn it.
“What’s that face for?” Cash asks.
“What face?”
“You look like you’ve tasted something sour when all I mentioned was your love life.”
I shove him toward the door, and we walk down the hallway to the front of the house. “I don’t need a love life. Fuck love.”
“Daddy said a bad word.”
I sigh at both Lyric and my daughter just inside the front door. They were leaving to go to the park when Cash arrived, and like when he saw Cash earlier, Lyric’s eyes widen.
Evidently, I’m a lazy, cliché sellout, but Cash Kingsley is a rock god.
I could point out Eleven has way more VMAs and Kids’ Choice Awards than Cash Me Outside, so …
Lyric’s kind of frozen, in the middle of taking off his jacket, and Kaylee stands there looking up at him as if it’s his job to scold me for swearing.
“You’re, uh, him. Uh, Cash … Cash Kingsley.”
Cash puts on a charming smile I know from personal experience is hard to resist.
He glances at me out of the corner of his eye before making his move toward my man … ny. My manny. Kaylee’s manny, damn it.
“Fan?” he asks and offers his hand to Lyric.
Lyric shakes it with both of his hands. “Understatement.”
“Oh, sure, he meets me and insults me, but you, he’s gaga over.” I huff.
Cash looks back at me. “Clearly this guy has taste.”
I shoot him the finger.
“Daddy!”
“What?” I ask innocently.
“That’s the rude finger.”
“Cash deserved it,” I mutter.
Finally, Lyric lets Cash go, but it’s only to look at me. “Is that two dollars in the swear jar?”
“Nice to meet you, Lyric, but I better be going,” Cash says.
Lyric looks confused. “How’d you know—”
Cash turns to me. “You’re right, Ry. It’s a shame this one is straight.”
My heart drops dead.
Ringing in my ears echoes around my brain.
That asshole!
No, I didn’t tell him Lyric has no idea about my identity, and no, he didn’t technically out me, but because I know Lyric is not straight, and I told Cash he was … oh fuck.
There is absolutely no way out of this.
I call after Cash as he moves toward the front door. “I’m burning all your songs in a dumpster fire.”
“Look forward to it,” he yells back and leaves.
My gaze flicks between Lyric and Kaylee, and they stare back.
There’s only one thing I can do. Pretend none of that happened.
Cash’s motorcycle roars to life outside, and I pretend that doesn’t exist either.
“Hey, who wants dinner?” I turn on my heel.
“It’s only four,” Lyric says.
I don’t look back. “Early dinner.” My voice cracks.
“Ryder?” Lyric’s voice is both stern and inquisitive.
It makes me pause, and I slump as I turn back around. “Kaylee—”
“Go clean my room. I know.”
“I was going to say go play, but sure. If you’re offering to clean …”
My daughter’s face lights up. “You said play. No backsies.” She runs off.
“So, dinner?” I ask again.
His hazel eyes narrow at me. “Why does Cash Kingsley think I’m straight when you know I’m not? Like, definitely not.”
“Maybe you give off a super-straight vibe?”
“Bitch, please.”
My feet stumble backward as if they think I can get out of this by running away. Yet, my newly found, high, squeaky voice jumps in. “I might’ve told him you were straight? Okay, bye.”
I go to leave but can’t.
“Why?” The question comes out sounding hurt with a slight edge of anger thrown in, and there’s no way I can leave it at that.
There are so many things I could say: because you’re my nanny. Because Cash is not the guy for you. Because I didn’t want Cash to think you were available. Because the thought of you and Cash makes me feel angry and gross, and I don’t know what that’s about. The words that come out, though, are not what I was expecting.