I’d gambled everything on his word. And for what?
I shook my head, trying to clear it. “There’s a…” I swallowed, raising my hand to my head. “There’s a tear in the membrane today. I don’t know what’s wrong with me.”
He stared back at me, silent.
I dropped my eyes, remembering how it felt. How I watched him and imagined what it would be like to kill someone you hated.
“I wanted to see you throw her away,” I whispered.
He stood there, quiet, as if studying me or trying to figure something out, and then he sighed, rubbing the water all over his face.
He cleared his throat. “I have a sister,” he told me. “Her name is Nik, but everyone calls her Banks.” He met my eyes again. “If something happens, and I can’t be there for her—if they arrest me for this—you need to go to my house and help her. She doesn’t have anyone else. You understand?”
Huh?
“You’re asking me?” I looked at him, confused. “Why?”
He had tons of people he could count on.
But he just turned around, shut off the water, and raised his arms, smoothing his hands over his hair. “I’m not sure anyone else would’ve helped me bury a body,” he murmured.
Water poured over me as he stood there, and I looked up, noticing small scars on the underside of his arms.
Not even his friends?
“She’s your age,” he told me. “No one knows about her, and don’t ask why. She’s doesn’t have anyone but me. Promise me.”
It took a moment, but I finally nodded. “A sister. Nik. My age. Got it.”
He smiled, small but genuine, and he grabbed the towels, walking over and shutting off my shower, handing me one.
“A tear in the membrane…” he mused to himself, putting his arm around me and pulling me out of the shower. “Come on. Let’s go find Will.”
Will
Present
Of course.
Of course, she wanted to run, because that’s all she ever wanted to do.
But rather than be hurt about it, I was pissed now. I made excuses years ago—I wasn’t good enough for her or she had too many hang-ups to let herself want me, but now, there was no doubt. She was the selfish, heartless, waste of time Damon always said she was for rejecting me, and she could fuck right off.
I didn’t need anyone to save me, and I didn’t need her for anything.
Reaching down, I pulled her off Alex, hearing her shirt tear as I threw her back and out of the way. If she was actually going to leave without me, then she could stay here without me, too. Goddammit.
She lunged again, diving down for her bag of food, but I grabbed her by the collar, scowling down at her.
“You must be high if you think you’re going anywhere,” I said.
She shoved me, her glasses somewhere on the floor as Alex climbed to her feet.
“Didn’t you ever wonder what Damon and I were doing together that night you found us at the school?”
My eyes twitched, and she chuckled to herself.
“You don’t even want to know what really happened the day you got arrested, either, do you?”
“I know what happened,” I growled.
She laughed again, but her eyes fell, and I saw tears pooling. “Yes. Everything except my side of the story, and maybe you would’ve done things differently and you would still hate me for what I did even if you knew the whole story, but maybe you’d let me say words that need to be said, but you won’t. You know why?”
I heard movement upstairs, and I knew we needed to hide. Right now.
“Because you don’t want to deal with things,” she whispered. “Damon knew it. I knew it. Everyone knew it. You didn’t have problems, because you didn’t want problems. You let the current carry you and c’est la vie.”
My fists tightened around her shirt.
“You were the child everyone protected,” she went on. “Damon said you were untainted by anything bad, and that’s what made you special to us. That quality needed to be preserved.”
They talked about me? Together? Behind my back?
“You never thought it was odd?” she pressed. “Damon and I had hated each other. What were we doing that night? How come I was the only person to know about his sister?”
I assumed she was talking about Banks and not Rika. None of us found out about Banks until more than a year after we’d gotten out of prison.
Emmy knew about her in high school?
She held my eyes, the tears in them shaking. “Why did you never ask these questions?”
“Because I—”
“Because you didn’t want to know the answers,” she told me, cutting me off. “If you didn’t know what was going on, then you didn’t have to deal with it.”
“That’s not true.”
“Oh, right,” she fired back. “I forgot you had a method of dealing with your problems, after all, unlike the rest of us weaklings.”
I flared my eyes. What the fuck?
How the hell did she know about me using? Goddammit.
Her gaze faltered, and I could tell she saw the look on my face and maybe thought she shouldn’t have said that, but I shoved her away, every muscle on fire with fight.
Alex grabbed her arm and pulled her toward the stairs. “Just shut up, Emory,” she gritted out through her teeth. “Everyone is hurting. It’s not all about you. We have to pull together.”
She yanked her arm free and backed up toward the door, her eyes darting between us.
“You should go hide,” she told Alex. “And I hope you get home safe.”
She was leaving. She was actually walking out of here, to her death, because her pride took up so much room in her head that there was no space for common sense.
She’d been fine earlier. Or somewhat fine.
She couldn’t stay here with both of us. She was leaving me.
“And when the crew arrives?” Alex whisper-yelled. “We’re not leaving this island without you, and you’re only going to delay our getaway as everyone scours the terrain for your dead body, dumbass!”
“He got sent here,” Emmy argued. “It’s his fault any of us are here now.”
She spun around, grabbed her bag, and clutched the door handle. Alex rushed over and yanked her wrist away.
Emmy twisted around and shoved Alex, sending her body flying backward. She stumbled, spinning around, and landed on her hands and knees…
Right at Aydin’s feet.
My lungs emptied, my gaze rising to meet his face.
Oh, shit.
He stood between the stairs and the dining room. Taylor entered behind him as Rory and Micah stood at the railing at the top of the stairs.
I steeled my spine as everyone took in our newest addition, but my gut knotted all the same. He might let me have one, but not both. I couldn’t protect them both.
Alex remained frozen for a moment, staring at his shoes, but then slowly, she lifted her head and looked up at him.
He looked down at her, freshly dressed in a black suit, white shirt, and no tie. I didn’t realize I wasn’t breathing until my lungs started tightening.
His jaw flexed, and his eyes grew hard. “Micah?” he called. “Rory?”