Slipping my boots on, I grab a shirt and pull it over my head, all in silence. When I’m dressed, I turn around to look at her one last time, sure that this will indeed be my last time seeing her this close.
“You’re a coward, Ford Matthews,” she calls out.
Nodding, I smirk. “Yeah, probably. Seems you know all about being a coward though, don’t you?” I say, knowing that it’s a slap to the face. “Also, I’m just really fucking tired. You know where to find me. If you want us, you know all you gotta do is give a smile and I’m putty in your pretty little hands. You want a real life, one on a working ranch, a simple life, then you got it. But it won’t be this,” I say, waving my hand around. “And I’ll never be able to provide this. So, you gotta be good with it, all of it.”
“So now it’s about money?”
“It’s about everything, it’s all a package.”
Stephanie turns her back to me, and I pick up my suitcase after she has. Clearing my throat, I open her front door, standing and waiting for her to turn back around, but she doesn’t.
“You need me, you got me. Even if you don’t want me, I’ll always help you if you need it. Go to the police on this mafia shit. Don’t associate with them. Their protection from whatever it is you think they’re protecting you from, it ain’t free.”
STEPHANIE
I turn around just in time to see the door close behind him. He called ahead for a ride. He planned on leaving me, and I don’t know if that makes any of this worse or not. What I do know is, I don’t like the way any of this makes me feel.
Tears fall from my eyes, down my cheeks, and on to my shirt. My hair is a mess, but I don’t care. None of it matters. Ford is gone. The way it feels, it’s different from any time that I’ve walked away from him.
My stomach clenches and I walk over to my sofa, sinking down on the cushion as my stomach cramps and agony tears through me. My shoulders shake as my body begins to tremble. I have the insane urge to run after him.
This cannot be the end of our love story. I won’t allow it. He’s right though. I’m not ready to walk away from this life yet. I have loose ends to tie up. He’s also spot-on in his assumption that I don’t know if I’m ready to live the life of a rancher’s wife. I don’t know that I’ve ever been ready to be that.
My phone rings on the coffee table and I debate not answering it, until I see who it is. He said he was my friend, claims he’s been my friend. I guess now is the time I test that friendship, because shit is about to get really ugly.
“Can you come over?” I whimper.
“Oh shit, on my way.”
I stay sitting on the edge of the cushion, staring into nothingness as tears stream down my face in complete silence. I did this to myself. Just like I’ve always brought everything bad that’s happened to me on myself.
Ford may have walked out of those doors, but I did that to him twice. He came to me, came back to fight for me, until he ran out of fight. Can I really blame him? I’m not sure that I do.
All he’s ever wanted is a quiet life on his family ranch. All I’ve ever wanted was a glittery stage. We’re not the same, and yet he’s the only man who has ever made complete sense to me.
“Girlie,” Damion’s voice says in a hushed tone.
Turning to him, I try to give him a wobbly smile, but he only shakes his head as he closes the distance between us.
“He’s gone,” I breathe.
“Is it final?”
Shaking my head, I lift my knees and I tell him everything that happened. I know that he partially sides with Ford when he doesn’t make a scene about the way things just kind of ended, yet didn’t really end.
“What do you think?” he simply asks.
“I don’t know.”
“What do you want?”
I shrug my shoulder.
“Earlier today you wanted to run to the farm. So, either you want that farm boy ass for life, or you were playing with him and just wanted his dick for a while. Either way, I won’t judge, but you can’t have both and he’s made that very clear.”
“I want him. I want a simple life, but leaving here, maybe I jumped the gun?”
“You ran back here because you were worried about those videos getting out, not because you didn’t want to be with him, right? Or did you run because you were falling for him all over again?”
I hate the question, mostly because it’s a really damn good one. Why did I run? I know what made me leave, it was the video, but was that the only reason? I doubt it.
I was falling for the brooding cowboy all over again.
It’s easy to do when he’s smart, sexy, and gives no fucks about who I am or what I can give him. Plus, what we have in bed is something indescribable. Every part of him is indescribable and I just let him walk away from me without any kind of fight.
He wasn’t wrong. I dropped everything and ran back here, for what? To help Sebastian out of trouble? I mixed myself up with the Russian mafia because of a sex tape? What the actual fuck is wrong with me?
“Damion?” I gasp. He turns to look at me, his eyes focused on mine, his brow arching in question. “I just let Ford walk away from me,” I whisper.
His lips curve up into a smile. “What are you going to do about it?”
I shake my head. “I’m going to get my shit handled as fast as humanly possible and get the fuck out of here.”
“You gonna be a farm girl?” he asks with a small laugh.
Nodding my head, my lips curve up into a huge smile. “I am. I’m going to follow my gut, my heart, and my head and make that man mine again.”
“And again, hopefully.” He chuckles.
“You can say that again.” I grin.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
FORD
I don’t know why, but I expected her to come after me. Sitting on the airplane as it lands, then taxis at the Austin airport, I can’t help but feel a sense of sadness wash over me. I’ve been feeling far too fucking emotional since Stephanie came back into town.
Now that it’s over, I need to get back to myself, stuff that shit down, and move on with my life, the way I promised myself I would do. Clearing my throat, I stand, thankful that I don’t have to wrestle with a carry-on bag.
Once I’m out of the hustle and bustle of the airport, I walk out and inhale the thick Texas air. It’s good to be home, even if the looming cloud of all that is Stephanie hasn’t completely cleared away from above me, I just have to realize that it probably never will.
I’m not surprised to see Louis’ truck waiting for me in the passenger loading area. Chuckling, I make my way toward him.
Climbing into his passenger seat, neither of us speaks as he pulls out into heavy traffic. I’m thankful for the silence, but I also know that it’s not going to last. I know that if the tables were turned, I wouldn’t be quiet and I haven’t been.
“That was a quick trip,” he begins.
“It was,” I agree.
We’re quiet for another moment, but it doesn’t last, just like I knew that it wouldn’t. I don’t mind. I need to talk about what happened. I didn’t even go to Beaumont’s to tell him goodbye, just sent him a text in the airport terminal, like a fucking pussy.