I sighed and closed my eyes for a moment before opening them again and catching her gaze with mine. “I love all these little, seemingly insignificant things about you and I love how much shared history we have and our little inside jokes and…well, I love the way you make me a better person. Just by being in my life, you make me better. You bring color and tone and depth into my life and you see me. You’re the only person who has ever really seen me.
“I’ve been half in love with you since the moment you stopped to help me pick up the books you knocked out of my arms but I never thought you would ever see me as that guy, the guy you could be with. And then things changed when we were in Kalopsia and I think you felt things change too.”
Frankie dropped her gaze to the pavement, and I held my breath. I didn’t know what else to say to convince her that what I felt for her went beyond friendship.
She looked up and her eyes were suspiciously shiny. “Things did change, Lucas,” she whispered. “But that doesn’t mean it would work out for us. We are so different and you now have this amazing opportunity and I would only hold you back. You have a title, for god’s sake, and I am just a bartender who likes to wear jeans and boots and has hair that never stays styled no matter how much product I use.”
I stepped toward her and rested my hands on her shoulders. I wanted to pull her into my chest and wrap my arms around her and never let her go, but I didn’t, she wasn’t ready for that yet, she still needed space.
“I don’t care about any of that,” I said. “If working in Kalopsia for Jamie is a problem, then I will walk away from it—”
“No! No, you can’t do that. You would end up resenting me and I couldn’t live with that.”
“So come back with me,” I said. “Come back to Kalopsia and stay with me and work with me and marry me.”
She stared at me for a beat but then glanced away.
“I can’t,” she said.
“Why?”
“Why? Because of all those reasons I just listed. I am not the woman you marry and give a title to, Lucas. I can’t be sweet and sophisticated and graceful. I am loud and uncouth and prefer to drink with the locals than hobnob with other royals. I would be a curiosity for a while, like a new toy, and then everyone would get sick of me—you would get sick of me, and then what? It’s just better to skip all that and try to keep our friendship intact rather than messing it up with a breakup that neither of us would recover from.”
“You’re wrong,” I said, but I knew I wouldn’t convince her. Frankie had to realize on her own how good we could be and there was nothing more I could say to change her mind.
“Lucas—”
“No, listen. I get it. I get you’re scared and it’s a gigantic leap for you. If anyone can understand how scary trying new things is, it’s me. But listen, I love you. I am in love with you and that isn’t going to go away. Not now and not in fifty years when we’re both old and gray. But I won’t force you to do something you don’t want to do. I do, however, have something else to tell you. An offer from the king, and it has no bearing on whether or not you want to be with me.”
“The king wants to offer me something?” she asked, blinking in surprise.
“He wants to offer you a job,” I replied.
“A job?” she squeaked.
“He wants you to come back so you can do your interview with him, but then, after you graduate, he wants you on his team. He wants you to consult on the rebuilding efforts and to liaise with the spokespeople from the village. He wants your input into what the country needs, what the community needs.”
“You’re joking.”
I shook my head. “I’m not, and as I said, it has nothing to do with you and me. You can tell me to take a hike and Jamie would still want you to work for him.”
She blinked at me without speaking for so long that I sighed. I leaned in and brushed a kiss on her cheek, breathing in her scent before stepping back and letting my arms drop from her shoulders.
“I missed you, Frankie,” I said. “I hope you think about what I said. I’ll be here until the day after tomorrow. I’m in meetings all day tomorrow with Effie and then I’m going back. If you want to talk about the job…or about us, you have my number.” I took a long look at her, probably my last one, and I smiled sadly. “It really was good seeing you.”
I turned and walked away without looking back.
Francesca
I watched Lucas walk away and felt my heart walking away with him.
It was like a dream; seeing him again, listening to the way he told me all the things he loved about me, him actually standing up to me and calling me on my crap. It didn’t sound like the same Lucas who’d stumbled into the bar a few short months ago and told me he needed me to help him because he was too afraid to stand up to his father and yet…hadn’t I seen hints of this new and improved Lucas in the weeks we spent in Kalopsia?
I blew out a slow breath.
He wanted me. He wanted me for more than just his support pet. He actually wanted the woman I was, warts and all. No one knew me like Lucas knew me. He’d seen me at my worst and he’d never walked away…until now. But then I could hardly blame him. I’d walked away first. I’d taken his confession and the love he offered me and I’d turned my back on it and on him.
“Lucas!” I called, but it was too late. He was gone.
I pulled out my phone to call him and get him to come back, but my finger froze over his number. I needed to do this right. I’d made so many mistakes, and he deserved more than a phone call in the middle of the night and me blubbering all over him. It had taken some serious intestinal fortitude for him to come to Boston and pour his heart out—yet again—to me. He deserved a similar gesture in return.
How I would do that, I had no idea, but Mom might. I needed to talk to her, and I needed to make some plans. I was more the spontaneous surprise kind of person, but if Lucas could be spontaneous and come to me, then I could try a bit of planning in return. He deserved it. Lucas deserved to have someone do something for him for a change. The man always seemed to bend over backwards to help everyone else, and it was time someone—me—did something for him.
I just didn’t know what.
I called an Uber and headed home, while my brain discarded plan after plan. I burst through the door expecting Mom to be awake and waiting for me, but of course she wasn’t, and I couldn’t wake her.
I headed up to my room and flopped on my bed. What was I doing? I couldn’t even come up with a way to declare my feelings for Lucas, even though I knew I loved him and wanted to be with him. This was why I always thought we’d be a terrible idea together, because I wasn’t good at this stuff. I wasn’t good at the deep and meaningful; I was only good at the over-the-top and shallow. How could I be a good partner for Lucas? How could I be a good employee for the king?
My stomach clenched.
I had a choice to make.
I could go on believing I would never be good enough for the people around me, or I could choose to believe something new.
I could choose to believe I was good enough.
I could choose to believe it when Lucas told me he loved me.