“No, babe.” Tentatively, he cups my face. “I’m not like everyone else. I’m your best friend. Nothing about what’s happened alters that fact. Even if you can’t forgive me. Even if you tell me to go away. I will always be your best friend. I will always care about you and ensure you’re safe.”
“Did you tell him about Kai and me?”
He shakes his head, dropping his hands from my face. “I didn’t have to. He could see it for himself. But I would’ve told him if he hadn’t figured it out because you were risking so much with Kai.” I suck in a sharp breath. I’m pleased he’s being honest with me, but that hurts too.
Stress seeps from his pores, and remorse is clear on his face. “I tried not to betray your confidence, and I told Drew the bare minimum because you deserved to be happy, and you were happy with Kai. So, I was doing everything I could to ensure he wasn’t a threat to you. I only told Drew the things I felt it was important he knew. Only things that impacted your safety. I swear.”
He rubs at a spot between his brows. “He went fucking apeshit on my ass after you told him about the Grid, demanding to know what else I’d kept secret, but I told him nothing, and he’s no right to demand anything of me now.”
“Why not?”
“Because I don’t work for him anymore. I quit the morning after the shootout. When I discovered you were missing and none of those fucktards kept you safe.” His nostrils flare. “Did the bastards tell you they kept me a virtual prisoner? I booked a plane ticket when Drew told me you were at Parkhurst, but they wouldn’t let me leave.” Frustration billows from his ears. “I didn’t care about the shit they were telling me. I just cared about getting you out of there.”
His eyes plead with me, and my lip wobbles as I grapple to contain my emotions. If Xavier had come to Parkhurst, he’d be dead now. He’s smart enough to know that too, but he was still willing, and that speaks volumes. I want to hug the shit out of him, but I can’t forget he was lying to me for months.
It’s so hard to remain steadfast.
I mean, I’ve been able to put the other’s deceptions behind me, so I should be able to do the same for Xavier. But it’s different. In both a good and bad way. On the one hand, because he’s my closest friend—besides Jane—it makes it easier to understand and forgive. But that’s also the reason it’s harder. He was, is, my best friend, so the betrayal runs even deeper.
But, then again, I felt the same way about Kai. And I’m giving him a second chance.
Xavier deserves the same opportunity.
“You understand you’ll have to win back my trust?” I ask.
He nods his head vigorously. “I’ll do whatever it takes. Just don’t give up on me.”
“You promise there will be no more secrets and lies?”
“I promise.” His eyes radiate sincerity, and they’re bright with hope and expectation.
I stop fighting it and wrap myself around him. His arms hug me in a warm embrace, and I shutter my eyes, clinging to my friend, praying we can find a way back to where we were. Because his friendship means so much to me. And I don’t want to lose him from my life.
We hug it out, and then I pull back, eyeing him circumspectly. “Your deception hurt, Xavier. It hurt real bad. I’m surrounded by people I considered friends and family, and every person has betrayed me, but I’ve put those feelings aside for the others, so I’ll do the same for you.”
He reaches for me, and I step back, holding up a palm. “But it doesn’t mean I forget or forgive. It means I’m giving you a chance to make it up to me, and if you fuck up, if you keep shit from me again, that is it for our friendship. It will be as dead as my father will be once we’re through with him.”
“You are staying in the car,” I hiss, glaring at Drew. “She’ll probably clam up if she sees you.”
“It’s not safe to hang around outside here by yourself.”
I roll my eyes. Honestly, it’s like talking to a brick wall. “You will be right out here watching, and there’s no one around at this hour of night.” I flap my hands in the air, gesturing toward the quiet street outside. “And Sylvia will not hurt me.”
“You don’t know that.”
“She was one of Mom’s best friends.” I level him with a “get real” look. “She won’t do anything to me.” I stretch my hand out to him. “But if it makes you feel better, give me your gun.” All the elite have a weapon in close possession, at all times. It was probably part of lesson one-oh-one at Parkhurst. Drilled into them from the time they were ten, when they first started going there.
He fishes a gun out of the glove box and hands it to me. I check that the safety is on before tucking it in the back of my black pants and opening the car door.
Drew tugs on my elbow. “Be careful.”
I glance over my shoulder at him. “Sylvia is as harmless as a fly.”
“I’ve learned to underestimate no one. You shouldn’t either.”
It’s sage advice. “Duly noted. Now let me go before I miss her.”
“I’ll shadow you, but if there are any issues, text me.”
“Got it.” I press a kiss to his cheek. “Stop worrying.”
He pulls my hand, lacing his fingers in mine. “You’re all I have left, Abby. I can’t bear the thought of anything happening to you.”
“Nothing will happen to me. I know how to take care of myself, but I appreciate your concern.” I kiss his cheek again. “Now chill out. I’ll see you in a while.”
I climb out of the car, shutting the door and watching as Drew moves it further along the road, pulling into the curb up ahead, where it’s less conspicuous. I don’t want to spook Trent’s mom before I’ve explained, because I need to pump her for intel.
I wait outside the shrink’s office for ten minutes before she shows. She spots me instantly. “Abigail?” Her voice sounds clear, which is unusual because she’s usually strung out from drugs or booze or a concoction of both. I’m guessing she likes to show up for her therapy sessions looking like she’s got a handle on things.
But I’ve been around her enough, heard Trent complain about her enough, to know it’s not the norm.
“Hi, Mrs. Montgomery,” I say, smiling as I approach her.
“I prefer Sylvia,” she says, and that doesn’t warrant an explanation.
“I was hoping you had a few minutes to go for a coffee,” I say. “There are some things I’d like to ask you.”
Her eyes dart around the area, her gaze turning suspicious. “The elite don’t know I’m here,” I say, answering her unspoken question. “Except for Drew.” Her eyes widen in alarm. “He won’t tell anyone about our meeting,” I rush to reassure her. “He’s trailing me purely to ensure I’m safe, and he means you no trouble.”
“Is that the truth?”
I don’t blame her for her caution. “Yes.” I step closer, relieved when her shoulders relax. “You were one of my mother’s best friends so that leads me to believe I can trust you. Can I trust you, Sylvia? Can I ask you about my mother and how she met my father and know that you won’t relay that back to your husband or your son or my father?”