P R O L O G U E
Finn
The crazy shit is happening again.
That thing where my blood boils beneath my skin and my heart pounds as though it’s going to burst out of my chest.
Not a heart attack. I might prefer that to knowing what it really is.
My reaction to him.
I see his face in angles and lines.
The sharp chin and floppy light blond hair falling into his brightest blue eyes.
I hate how I notice the lengthy frame of his body and the way his hands hold those notebooks he’s always carrying.
He’s a nerd and dresses as one. Jeans with slashes in both knees, a comic book t-shirt under a dark hoodie and a pair of Timberland boots on his feet. The kid needs to drag himself back from the 90s. The oldie decade is dead. I’d roll my eyes if they weren’t squinting aversion.
Unaware.
He’s always so unaware in his own surroundings.
It’s reckless in this jungle, where the weak get eaten alive.
I want to know what’s on the nerd’s mind all the time.
What makes his brain so interesting that he can act as though no one else is around him?
He strides the hallways and rarely glances at anyone.
Plenty look at him, and he only looks up from his shitty book when they call out to him.
It’s an oxymoron how he’s a popular nerd.
Everyone loves him, and that means I hate him.
I hate how my belly clenches every time I catch a whiff of apples because that asshat always smells like the fruit.
Does he eat them by the tree load?
Who cares?
I don’t.
I care that he annoys me.
Impossible to work him out. He’s a puzzle I can’t make sense of.
This annoyance started not so long ago.
And the more I see him, the worse it gets.
Resting a shoulder against my locker, my crew bound up to me, and I hardly give any notice to their conversations.
Bates, Sofia, Paris and Preston.
They crave my attention, but I tune them out. Bates will brag about who he banged last weekend. And Sofia will have her ninth, rich bitch third world, problem of the day.
Girls walk by, vying for our interest. I bet they’re wet when Bates throws them a pity wink, but nothing registers in this moment. It’s as if the hallway has cleared of everyone.
My eyes are on him.
With masculine grace, he moves along the hallway.
He chews his pen and I feel it in my chest.
A gnaw.
That is when my anger builds until it burns.
It rages inside me, screaming for an outlet.
How dare this jackass make me wonder and feel.
I’m a star football player, I don’t have deep emotions.
And I don’t give any thought to guys like him, that’s for damn sure.
Not any guy.
His expression is always unguarded.
It’s raw and open, as if I can touch it if I tried to.
Why is that?
Why doesn’t he care what people think about him?
It’s unnatural.
That same tickle I get when he’s near hits my throat again. And I swallow around it as one of my boys throws a ball and I lift my hand in the air to catch it on reflex.
The girls cheer and coo, trying to get closer to my athlete status.
It’s white noise. My eyes focus over their heads as he hits a left, disappearing into the science department.
Little fucking nerd probably going to suck a teacher’s dick for extra credit.
The thought of it sends a shard of…something through me.
Something I ignore.
I always ignore it.
A tick moves my jaw.
Crazy feelings stir inside of my chest and I try not to react.
Instead, I drag my gaze away and let Sofia’s arm curl around my waist. The blonde cheerleader is perky and up for anything, as always.
I need to expunge that little shit Sage Fierro from my mind.
I need to destroy him.
One accidental run in with the kid months ago and he’s ruining my fucking head.
I still feel his hands on my chest so he didn’t meet the floor with his face. I feel mine on his arms, saving him from the fall.
The same growl I had back then gurgles up my throat.
Those deep blue eyes and fucking mouth.
He’d looked up at me, so damn shocked.
I want to destroy him from the ground up.
Make it so he doesn’t exist, so I can stop this…whatever is pounding through my gut.
My father says find an enemy’s weakness and use it against them.
The nerd isn’t so innocent.
He doesn’t know he’s made a nemesis of me.
But he will soon.
The Fierro’s will discover they don’t own everything.
I’ll break him.
And I won’t have to think of those eyes or the burn in my chest ever again.
C H A P T E R 1
Sage
Staring across at Richmond Academy, the most elite school in New York, I wish to be anywhere else.
This place fucking blows.
As a provider of academia, it’s top notch.
But it’s ruled by assholes and bitchy queens, and that’s just the teachers. The kids are worse. If not for their outstanding science department I would have asked to attend the local high school.
Thank god I don’t have long left in this place.
I know what to expect when I step into the building and it gets my gut tightening. Same shit, different day.
My second oldest brother is ready to graduate. If I slam through my extra credits, I can bypass my senior year and go to college in the winter. Getting out of here is always forefront.
My baby sister, who is my best friend too, calls me antisocial.
I’m anti annoyance.
Anti-people.
Anti-anyone who distracts me.
There’s someone inside the privileged building who distracts me more than most. And I want to put my fist in his stupid face.
Only, I’m not the violent Fierro. That title would go to my older brothers. Even Raene might slap my tormentor before I do.
Me, I’m my mother’s son. Well mannered, responsible, polite and always civil. Hardworking and ambitious. Affectionate only when pinned down by the women in our family and forced to.
But he sends intense thoughts through my brain often.
It’s not worth it.
I say it over and over before I climb out of my car and slam the door closed, locking it with an electronic click.
Time to get this shit over with for another day.
I rush a hand through my floppy blond hair, pushing it out of my eyes, then sling the messenger bag over my head. It was my mistake wearing contacts today instead of my glasses, because my eyeballs hurt.
At exactly six feet tall, I see over most heads as I amble inside. I’m an old seventeen as my mom says. I don’t act like a regular kid should. Maybe that’s why I stand out so much. All us Fierro kids were born in December, and I’m hoping to get an early acceptance into college before my next birthday.
School work isn’t a chore when I like what I do.
Science and engineering make more sense to me than people do.
And most of them give me a wide berth.
Unlike Theo or Lachie, I don’t have a gang of friends or rule the school through popularity. My lane is singular. Richmond Academy is thin on the ground for queers too. So my dating life exists outside of school, and even that is sparse.