I kicked and thrashed, but it wasn’t enough. It wasn’t going to be enough.
I gasped out a name, but not my own, not even a call for help.
Tracey.
Tracey wasn’t here.
She was dead.
My baby sister was dead, and I wasn’t near the trailer. Instead, I was dying here, begging for someone to help me. And yet nobody could help.
I was little, too young to remember, and yet far too old to forget.
I was wearing the same clothes I’d had on when they killed her, and I was now covered in blood and screaming.
This time, the shadow above me turned into the man or woman who had attacked me.
I knew this had to be a dream. Or maybe a memory.
Perhaps I was mixing them up, but I couldn’t focus enough to pull myself out of the nightmare.
I couldn’t scream or slap my face or pinch my arms or do anything to pull myself out of the dream.
Nothing worked.
And the hands around my neck clutched harder.
I blinked, and the woman above me had my eyes and my smile, but there was something evil in it.
“Mom.”
She didn’t answer. She just kept squeezing.
She was killing me. My mother was killing me.
Like she’d helped to kill Tracey.
I blinked again, and it was no longer her.
Now, it was my dad.
And just like my mom, he wasn’t the age he should be now. He was the same age he had been when he killed me.
No, not me. My sister. When he killed Tracey.
There was no going back. There was no fixing this.
I was dying, screaming.
Help.
Then, somebody helped me.
“Paris.”
“Paris.”
My eyes shot open, and I sat up and screamed.
Suddenly, Dakota was there, holding me softly as I cried against her neck, her hands smoothing down my hair and holding me close.
I clung to her as I never had before. I hadn’t let anybody hold me like this before.
No, that wasn’t the case, was it? I had cried in the others’ hold when they were here for me throughout the past week when I woke up and screamed because the nightmares were back. There was no holding them back any longer.
“You’re safe. You’re here. I’ve got you.”
I pulled away then, needing to suck in gulps of air as I wiped my face.
“I’m sorry.”
Dakota looked at me and shook her head. “Stop it. Do not be sorry.”
“I hate crying on you. I already cried on everyone else.”
Dakota smiled softly, looking more motherly than I had ever seen her before. “The fact that you trust me enough to even cry in my presence means a lot. And you’re allowed to feel like this. You’re allowed to be scared. Something horrible happened. But you’re safe.”
“Maybe.” I ran my hands over my face a few times and then let out a breath.
“My ribs hurt.”
“I’m not surprised. They’re bruised. So much so that the doctor thought it might have been better if you had broken one.”
I tried to laugh and then held my side as I let out a slow breath. “Great. Breaking me would be better than what I’m feeling right now,” I grumbled. “I hate sounding like I’m riding the pity train.”
“You’re allowed to do that for the next few hours. I’ll give you that time. And then, after that, we’ll take you off the train and get you into some coping mechanisms. I’m sure between the four of us, we can probably figure those out.”
I rolled my eyes and smiled—the first real one I’d had since the attack.
“I still can’t believe they have no idea who it was,” I said, slowly rolling out of bed. Dakota was there in an instant, helping me up, and I leaned into her, hating that I felt so weak. I had no broken bones, a few stitches, and some very bruised ribs. My concussion was the worst of it, and I was still on concussion protocol, but so far, it looked like I was out of the woods. So much so that I was going back to work on Monday. My boss, the asshole that he was, had griped about having to give me a week off, but my doctor had gone to bat for me. And so had Prior. He didn’t know that I knew, but I had heard through the grapevine, namely Hazel, that he had fought for me.
I didn’t know what to think about that.
He had fought for me to have time to heal, had physically battled for me, too when I was in the parking lot. He had fought for me. Had probably saved my life.
And I hadn’t heard from him at all.
I knew he was giving me space, but it still felt weird. And then it felt weirder that it felt strange, considering that he was nothing to me except for a new friend and a coworker.
His name had been on the card from my company when they sent flowers and a bagel basket with a fantastic spread of cream cheeses. Everybody’s name had been on the card except Benji’s, and I was happy about that because I didn’t even want to look at that man’s name in my house.
Other than that, I hadn’t heard a word from Prior.
I needed space and time to heal, but I still wanted to thank him.
And I had no idea what I was going to say when it was time to do that. It wasn’t like I was good at this whole thing. I hated being in debt to anyone, and I knew I was going to be indebted to Prior for the rest of my life for what he had done.
Because if he hadn’t been there…?
No, I didn’t want to think about that. Of course, my dreams let me think about that enough. I didn’t need to obsess while awake, as well.
“Do you need help in the shower?” Dakota asked, and I looked at her before holding back a laugh.
“That sounds like the start of some very good porn.”
“Honey, if it was the start of a porno, I’d already have you in the shower,” Dakota said it so deadpan that I burst out laughing, and then groaned as I held my side.
“Stop making me laugh. It hurts, it hurts.”
She winced and helped me hobble over to the bathroom.
“I’m sorry. I can’t help it if I’m amazing.”
I smiled then, looking at the woman who was like a sister to me. Even if that gave me a little pang to think about, it was the truth.
“Thank you.”
“Aw, I love you.”
“Do you love me enough to take the next place in the pact?” I asked out of the blue. She tripped over her own feet, and thankfully, I was already leaning against the doorway so I didn’t get hurt.
“What?”
“What?” I countered.
“Where on earth did that come from?”
“I honestly have no idea. Other than the fact that I told Prior that I was giving up on this whole dating thing. So, we tried, I’m done. Now, it’s your turn.”
An odd look crossed her features, and she shook her head. “No. As soon as you’re up to it, we’ll find you a nice date.”
“No, we won’t. I mean, the last time you found me someone, the man wanted me to join his wife in bed. And while that might’ve been fun and kinky, it wasn’t what I was looking for.”
Dakota burst out laughing, and I grinned.
“You would have joined in?”
“I’m still young. Ish. A little banged up, sure, but no…probably not with them. You never know, though.” I winked, and she grinned.
“Now that we know that that might be on the table, we should add that to our notes for the next person.”