It hadn’t been them. It hadn’t been Benji either, even though for an instant, I’d thought it might have been him.
There were no cameras in the parking lot, something that was going to be changed.
And according to Hazel, I had Prior to thank for that, too.
So, I didn’t know who had attacked me, and I might not ever know. If it wasn’t attached to my past, and it wasn’t Benji, then who was it? Maybe one of the dates that I’d been on before? I didn’t know. I didn’t think so, though.
Maybe whoever it was only wanted my purse.
They hadn’t taken that, though. Instead, they had hurt me, bruised me, and gave me nightmares.
I still didn’t know who it was or who it could be.
The one name that kept coming to my mind no matter what, was the person who had been there when I needed help.
Prior had been there.
And I didn’t know what I was going to do about that.
I would have to face him soon. I needed to thank him and figure out what to say.
And all the while, I’d have to do my best not to think about him in any other way.
He wasn’t mine. He was someone else’s.
Maybe that was exactly why I needed to go on another date. To put Prior out of my mind. And the nightmares, too.
As I looked at my reflection in the mirror, I didn’t think I would be able to forget anytime soon. The bruises would fade, and my ribs would heal, but my nightmares would remain—like always.
No matter how far I looked into the future, my past was always there to haunt me.
Always.
Chapter 9
Prior
“Paris is back to work today, right?” Nate asked as we turned the corner, the sun coming up in front of us.
I nodded, let out a breath, and panted a bit since we were jogging. I hated talking while I ran. Nate loved the exercise, and since he was the one who wanted to jog this morning, and I needed to clear my head, I had to deal with the chatting. “Yes. I don’t think she’s working a whole day.”
“Your boss is letting that play out?” Nate asked.
“Yes,” I said, my chest burning. I was running way too fast, trying to keep up with Nate. It wasn’t that I wasn’t an okay runner, it was more that Nate was fucking good and could do this for hours. I liked to run a couple of miles and call it a day. Nate could probably run marathons if he tried.
However, he was my baby brother, and I had to at least try to keep up with him. It was the principle of the thing.
Nate had always been this way, though. The best athlete of us all. And it didn’t escape our notice that while he might be the best athlete, his twin sister was the one who was the sickest of us all, lupus trying to take her from us every time she got ill.
I frowned, pushing those weird thoughts from my mind. I didn’t know why I was getting all philosophical when it came to the family. Maybe it was because I was trying not to think about Paris and the fact that I was going to see her today.
I didn’t know why it should bother me. I kept thinking about her screaming, and what would’ve happened if I hadn’t been there. What would’ve happened if I had been two seconds late, or perhaps two seconds early? Would she have been as hurt if I hadn’t gotten there on time? Or maybe I should have walked her to her damn car so she wouldn’t be hurt at all.
I kept thinking about it, over and over again, but I couldn’t push it from my mind, even though I should.
I couldn’t fix this. I couldn’t help her.
“Prior?”
We turned into my driveway, and I leaned forward, resting my hands on my knees as I tried to catch my breath.
“What?”
“I asked if your boss is okay with Paris working half days. Are you okay?” “Fine. Just out of breath. You’re faster than me.”
“I’ve always been faster than you. And I have better endurance. And I’m prettier.”
“Whatever you say,” I said, flipping him off.
“You’re an ass, but because you’re a hero, I guess you’re allowed to be.”
I cringed, hating that word.
“I need water, a shower, and coffee. And don’t call me that.”
“Why?” Nate asked.
“Because I’m not. Paris still got hurt.”
“ you were still there for her. Paris is one of us now. Even if she weren’t, you would’ve helped her, any of us would have, but you were there, and you did your thing. You protected her. She’s practically family now that Hazel’s going to be part of our clan.”
“And we always take care of family,” I said, walking into my house and going towards the fridge so I could chug water. I got down two glasses, poured a couple of waters, and chugged the contents while Nate did the same before we went for more.
“You know, we’ve always had a decently big family with the five of us kids and Mom and Dad, but now with Arden marrying, and Cross being with Hazel, things keep getting bigger.” Nate frowned and looked down at his glass.
“What’s wrong?”
“Nothing. Just thinking about how some things have changed, and I felt like we weren’t really ready for it.”
“Why would we need to be ready for our siblings to get married? Mom and Dad have never once pressured us to get married.”
“You’re right. It’s just...I don’t know. Ignore me.”
“No, I won’t. What’s wrong?”
“Nothing’s wrong. I guess I got a little light-headed from the run.”
I let him lie because Nate never got dizzy from his runs, but I poured him more water, and then I leaned against the counter, staring at my baby brother.
Nate was generally loud, like me. Cross and Macon growled more than we did and tended to be a little quieter. Arden was the mediator between the four of us, and we were her protectors. Though in the end, sometimes—or most of the time—she protected us, too.
Nate had his secrets. I didn’t know what they were, though. He was cagey on occasion, even though I didn’t think others noticed. Or maybe they did. Perhaps we were all so good at protecting each other that we let ourselves guard our individual secrets.
If he was hurting, though, he would tell us. And even though I like to needle him because he was my baby brother, I would let him have his secrets. After all, I was keeping my own.
Like the fact that I thought I liked Paris.
Fuck. I shouldn’t. Not only was she my coworker and part of the whole crew now, and dating anyone within the group would make things tricky and unmanageable, but it was also just wrong.
Allison had used Paris as her scapegoat to cheat on me and to push me out of the relationship that I was already trying to get out of on my own.
And I didn’t like the fact that Allison might’ve been right. Even in the vaguest sense of the word.
“I need a shower. You showering here?”
“Um, I know that you’ve been through a lot losing Allison and everything,” Nate began. I didn’t want to hear the end of that sentence, but I let my little brother go on.
“I don’t want to shower with you. Although you could probably get the places on my back that I have trouble reaching, that whole incest thing gets complicated.”