Not wanting to sit down with them again and endure more pretending, I head to the bar. As I walk through the crowd, I notice everybody staring at me as if they’re sizing me up or something. Some people actually look scared when I walk by them, making space for me to walk through.
The whole thing is surreal, and I feel nothing but out of place and misunderstood. I almost turn back around and walk back to the table out of desperation when I spot Zane at the bar. Knowing that I can’t make a scene, I take the seat next to him without looking over.
“Can I get a glass of water, please,” I ask the bartender whose attention I catch.
“Of course. Sparkling or still?”
“Sparkling sounds great.” I barely finish my order before he produces a glass and a small bottle of water in front of me. “Thank you.”
“No champagne to celebrate?” Zane whispers next to me.
“Stop it. You know that I don’t want this,” I say in a hushed voice, so only Zane can hear me. “Do you think I’m happy about this?” I ask and take a sip of my water.
Putting his elbow on the bar top, he lets his head fall into his hand. “I know, but that doesn’t make this any easier.”
“I’m going to ask Matteo to take us home. There we can talk.” I get up from my seat and weave through the crowd, back to our table.
Matteo and someone I don’t know, are deep in conversation when I get there. So, I tap my father lightly on the shoulder to get his attention.
He stops talking and looks up to see who dares to interrupt him. “Dove, you enjoying the party?”
“It’s a lovely party, thank you for planning all of this, but I’m rather tired, and I’d like to go home. Do you mind having someone take me back to the house?”
Alberto perks up next to him. “I can take you.”
“I would rather have someone less drunk take me home,” I insist.
“Of course, dear. Let me get someone for you.” Matteo smiles and waves over some of his men. “Take my daughter home,” he orders, and the men nod.
“Thank you, Father. Enjoy the rest of your night.” I force out the pleasant words when all I want to do is strangle this man with my own hands. I don’t care if he is my father or if we share blood. This man is pure evil, and I’ll do whatever it takes to stop him.
I follow the two men out of the main room and to the front door. By the time we make it to the car, Zane has caught up to us. We drive back to Matteo’s mansion in silence, not wanting to talk in front of the men, but I know this silence will be over once we are alone.
We park right in front of the house. I get out as soon as the car comes to a standstill. Zane follows me inside the house just as my father’s men do. But unlike Zane, the men stay downstairs.
When we are finally inside the containment of our room, we both sigh deeply.
“I can’t do this, Dove. I can’t watch you with them, with some other guy… even if you are pretending. It’s like my worst nightmare playing out in front of me. I love you too much. I can’t stand this. I’m scared, Dove. Scared! I don’t even remember the last time I experienced that feeling, but I am now. I’m scared of losing you, losing us.”
“I know…” My voice is raw with emotion, I’m feeling everything he just said. “I hate this too, but if I need to gain Matteo’s trust. I need him to give me freedom so we can get away. If we try again now, he’ll kill you, and lock me up.”
Zane growls in annoyance, knowing that I’m right. Frustration and anger come off of him in waves, and I know if I don’t calm him down, he is going to punch the wall or something.
“Can we just lie down so you can hold me? Please, I just need you to hold me,” I whine.
Zane nods and starts taking off his clothes before helping me out of my dress. Together we crawl into bed and under the blanket. He pulls me to his chest, and I snuggle up to him as close as I can. I don’t know how long I can have him like this, and for tonight, I don’t want to think about this either. I let his warmth engulf me, let his unique scent calm me, and the steady beat of his heart lull me to sleep.
40
Something terrible is going to happen. I can feel it. Dove is acting stranger than usual. After the event the other night, I poured my heart out to her, confessing my biggest fears, and instead of bringing us closer, she seemed to be pushing us further apart. She is shutting down, and I feel helpless against it. I wasn’t lying when I told her I was scared. I’m scared shitless. I feel like I’m fighting a battle I can’t win. I feel like I’m watching her getting sucked into this world. Something I’ve been trying so hard to avoid.
I need to do something, change my tactics, so I can stop this. I need to stop this before all is lost. Before my Dove is tainted by Matteo even more.
She is not only pulling away from me mentally but physically as well. Yesterday she spent most of the day in Matteo’s personal library, preferring to read a book than spend time with me. This morning after breakfast, she disappeared into the library yet again.
Tired of waiting around for her, I leave the room and head toward the library. Every guard I pass looks up at me, their watchful eyes examine me and my mood.
When I enter the grand room, filled from top to bottom with books, I find Dove curled up on a chair by the window. A book laying on her lap. Her head snaps up when she notices me walking in. I’m surprised to find her eyes puffy and red like she’s been crying.
“What’s wrong?” I shoot the two guards posted at the door, an accusing glare. They better not have touched her. “Did someone hurt you?”
“No, come sit.” She sniffs. “I need to talk to you.”
Hesitantly, I take the seat across from her. I know whatever she is about to tell me is not going to be good. I mentally prepare myself to hear what she has to say, but the truth is, nothing could have prepared me for what she says.
“You need to leave, Zane.” A semi-truck could have hit me, and I would feel less wounded. “You can’t stay here any longer. This…” She motions between us. “Whatever this is, it’s not working. We need to end this now before it gets any further.”
“Any further?” There is no further. We are already at the end. I’ve loved her for years, and she loves me back. “We are meant to be together.”
“No, we are not. I’m meant to be here. I’m meant to carry on the Castro name, and you don’t fit in here, at all.” I know she is playing. She doesn’t mean this, she can’t mean this, but hearing the words come out of her mouth, regardless of their truthfulness, hurts like hell.
“Just stop, Dove! I can’t listen to this shit. You and I both know that’s not true,” I growl. “Drop the act, I don’t care who is in the fucking room. Just stop!”
“This isn’t an act. I want you to leave, Zane. I need to do this. I need to marry Alberto, and you need to go your own way.”
I want to cover my ears with my hands, so I don’t have to listen to this or cover her mouth so she can’t get another word out. Either way, I can’t listen to this any longer.
“I’m not going anywhere,” I growl, ready to destroy something. Getting up from my seat, I start pacing around. “And I’m not letting you marry some fuckhead just because some guy tells you to.”