Don’t laugh. They’re evil.
I shiver at the thought.
A minute later, Ethan’s by my side at the sink. He grabs the bowls out of my hands and scrubs them down before handing them to me to rinse.
He’s big. Way bigger than I am. Broad and tall and rugged.
Standing so close to him at the sink reminds me of the first time I saw him, shirtless and dripping wet. With all those muscles and that angry ink etched into his golden skin.
The kind of guy to make a girl ache in just the right ways, if he were another guy and I another girl.
This close, I can smell his shower gel. Something manly and crisp. He must’ve showered right before he came over.
I clear my throat. “Would you need me to cook or clean your house too?”
“I’m not hiring you to be my maid. Just to take care of Mila and Cody. I’ll do my best to make them dinner, clean the house, do our laundry. Those aren’t your jobs, and I never want you to feel like they are. If you don’t care that I smell like a barn animal, I can probably come in to make them a quick breakfast if you want. Then you’d only have to make them lunch.”
Something about that image softens me. Ethan slaving away in the heat and stopping to take care of his kids. I’m starting to get what my sister said about this guy doing it all on his own.
“I can handle breakfast and lunch. That’s not a big deal.” I shift to get a quick glance at him and am overwhelmed by his presence when he reaches across me to turn off the faucet.
His voice is low and gravelly. “Listen, I really am sorry for being such an asshole to you the other day. I’d love nothing more than for you to take care of my kids. I promise to stay out of your way and not annoy you too much.”
He dries his hands on his shirt and turns to me, but he’s looking at the ground. “You asked why I’m being nice.” Those big blue eyes shift up until they sear into mine. “Well, I’m a nice guy. No one seems to think that, but I am. I’ve just… I’ve had a rough few years.” As though he’s flipping through a memory book, he frowns and glances away. “I’m going through an ugly divorce, and my mom, who’s been keeping my household together since my wife left, is headed to Chicago on Monday to help her sister. I can’t keep the business afloat and take care of my children by myself. It kills me to admit that, but it’s true. So I guess you could say I need you. I need your help.”
I don’t like how those words, I need you, make me feel soft and squishy, like a piece of bittersweet chocolate left out in the sun. “Why not call one of those nanny agencies? Get someone who’s fingerprinted and meets your qualifications.”
“I’m on some waiting lists, but they’re not sure they’ll find someone willing to live out here.” His eyes turn up to mine, a playfulness brightening his expression. “Should I be worried? Do you have a criminal record for all the coke and hookers?”
I laugh, remembering what I told him the other day. “Not exactly, but—”
“Then it’s fine. Don’t let my kids cook meth or play with sharp objects, and we should be good.”
Ethan
The house feels different with Tori in it. Perhaps because nothing’s really settled. After some begging and eating crow on my part at dinner the other night, Tori agreed to help me for the next two weeks. Long enough to see if she can get someone to sublet her apartment and for me to explore whether an agency can better handle my situation.
It seemed prudent to contact an agency in case Tori and I ended up clashing again. The fact we didn’t at dinner was a pleasant surprise, and if it taught me anything, it’s that I want us to get along in the meantime. I want her to know I’ll treat her well. That I’m not really an asshole.
As for my unbidden attraction to her? I figure it’ll pass. I haven’t been around a beautiful woman in a long time. Living on a ranch doesn’t make socializing easy. I don’t count Mallory Mathers or the like, because hooking up with one of my wife’s friends seems about as smart as jamming a wet finger in a light socket.
It’s been ages since I’ve been with anyone. Not since Allison, and that intimacy ended during her pregnancy with Cody. His second birthday later this summer is a reminder that she shut me out a long time ago. Two years is a long damn time to go without sex. I’m twenty-eight, not eighty.
Maybe my brother is right and I need to get out more. Start dating or something to take the edge off. Especially since Tori made it abundantly clear I’m not the kind of guy she goes for. That we would never have sex.
I chuckle, thinking about the fire in her eyes as the little tornado told me off again. All that passion oozing from her pores.
But she doesn’t have anything to worry about. I’d never take advantage of a woman.
As for her not being my type, well, that’s mostly true.
I’ve always gone for the polite and polished kind of woman. And a little high-maintenance. Not sure why since Allison has been anything but polite in the last few years.
Tori has a wildness about her, a level of honesty I’m not used to. At least not from a perfect stranger.
I think I like it.
I just can’t like it too much.
After so much time out of the dating game, it’s weird to think about diving back in. It’s even weirder to consider dating when my divorce isn’t final yet, but I know from mutual friends that Allison has already been out with other men. The thought makes my chest feel heavy with too many emotions to name.
A soft knock on the office door makes me look up.
“I’m packed and ready to go, son.”
The sight of my mother dressed for the airport shoots a bolt of fear through me.
She starts talking like it’s not a big deal she’s going to another state. “I told Tori where to find Cody’s hiding places. How to get the kids to brush their teeth. Where the emergency numbers are. Their daily schedule. Everything’s gonna be fine.”
I was never a momma’s boy growing up. That was Logan. But I’ll admit I’m a little torn up seeing her go. Probably ’cause we relied so heavily on each other after my father died.
We head into the living room where Tori is on the floor, dressed like a princess, compliments of my daughter’s styling efforts. Cody is hanging off Tori’s neck, and Mila is debating which bauble would look best on her new babysitter.
“Give your grandma a hug goodbye.” I motion for the kids to get up.
Mila takes one look at my mother, sees the suitcase behind her, and immediately starts bawling. Rushing into her grandmother’s arms, she cries so hard, she starts hiccupping.
Mom coos in her ear. “Honey, calm down. I’m only going for a month or two. I’ll be back soon.”
“But wha-wha-what if you don’t come back? Wha-wha-what if you stay away like Mommy? What if you don’t want us anymore?”
I close my eyes, my daughter’s words a cattle brand on my heart.
Does this ever get easier?
“Sweetie, I’m always, always gonna want you and your brother, and your momma wants you guys too.” Her voice is thick with emotion. “She’s just going through a rough time is all.” Smoothing down my daughter’s hair, my mom whispers, “I’m only a phone call away. Call me any time, night or day.” She pulls out of my daughter’s hug and holds her shoulders. “Hey, look at me.” Mila’s tear-stricken face cuts me to the core. “I need you to be a big girl and take care of your daddy and brother. Two men in a house by themselves need a good woman to look after them.”