‘I’m not an easy man, Barbara. But I never told you I’d be easy to be around, did I?’
‘No, I know you’re not and I know you didn’t… but I don’t think I can marry you if you’re going to be like this.’ My heart was pounding in my chest as I released out loud just what had been going over and over in my head for the past week.
I felt his thumb moving brusquely over the huge diamond on my finger, in what felt like anger, as he moved the contentious object from side to side. But when I allowed myself to delve further into his eyes, the only thing I could find there was perplexity.
‘It’s just that I see this side of you, Nico, when for a few hours you let me in past the façade you present to the world. Then you pull away because I think you’re scared I’ve seen too much and I don’t see you for days.’
‘There is no façade, Barbara. Take every rumour you’ve ever heard about me and double it. I am the man you’ve heard all about. I’m heartless, arrogant, single-minded and controlling. I’m not a nice person. I have done and ordered things to be done that would turn your stomach…’ He let out a loud sigh. ‘What I’m trying to say is, please don’t get some romantic idea in your head and think for one minute that you can see anything more inside of me. Because I can assure you, you’d be imagining something that categorically doesn’t exist.’
I tried to shelve the hurt that had unfolded itself inside of me at my stupidity and hoped my face didn’t give me away.
‘You have remembered that this is only an arrangement between us, haven’t you, Barbara?’
‘Of course, I have. But you need to understand that for us to pull this off, we need to be in this together,’ I countered quickly, pretending that I really couldn’t care less.
‘I agree, so let’s have some fun doing it. I more than like you, Barbara, and I know that I’m not mistaken when I say that I know you feel the same.’
‘Just what exactly are you asking me for?’ My heart rate increased with either panic or excitement, I wasn’t sure which.
‘Nothing more than what we’ve already agreed… Let’s enjoy each other’s company and see where it goes…I know this is a strange situation between us, but at the end of it you’ll be in a better place and I’ll have given my grandmother what she requires from me… I know that we can carry this off with more commitment from me.’
‘If I agree to carry on with this, you’ll most definitely need to be more available to me, and also I want your oath that you will not see any other women while we remain engaged or married… I might, in your eyes, look like I have stupid romantic notions of you being something more than a merciless bastard, but I will not be made to look a fool in anyone else’s… Do you understand me?’
A smile decorated his perfectly square jaw.
‘I understand perfectly, and I expect the same commitment from you also. Now drink your coffee and get some sleep if you can. My grandmother is looking forward to meeting and spending some time with you.’
‘What Nonna wants, Nonna gets?’
‘Exactly,’ he answered.
‘Then that shows me that you’re not heartless, Nico. Whatever you want to believe about yourself.’
With his hand refusing to let go of mine I started to recline my seat and, turning my head away from him, I closed my eyes and began to pray that sleep would carry me away.
I looked down at our conjoined hands, trying not to look surprised that even though we had left the plane and were walking over the tarmac to get to security, he still hadn’t attempted to break our connection. Surprisingly, holding his hand felt like the most natural thing in the world and from the looks we’d been getting from our small entourage I could almost hear the “ahhhh’s” going around their heads.
I hadn’t slept as he’d demanded and was beginning to feel tired and emotional. I’d sat in the plane for an hour feigning sleep, all the while feeling the warmth of his hand on mine and the more I thought on our previous conversation, the more I understood he was trying to warn me not to get too close to him.
The man was truly a mass of contradictions and conflicting actions. I was struggling to keep up.
Suddenly, a man with what sounded like an Australian accent shouted over to us.
‘G’day, mate.’ I watched as the guy jogged the short distance between our two groups and he talked to Trip almost as if they’d met before. Franco and his men instinctively gathered closer, only to be ordered away by a quick shake of Nico’s head.
‘Hey.’ Trip stopped and a smile spread over his face.
‘It’s you, isn’t it? You’re the pilot we met a few years ago in New York,’ the charismatic looking Aussie questioned.
‘Yeah, I remember. You were trying to check in your goat, what was its name?’
‘Mutton… or Snowflake, it depends on who you ask.’ The guy laughed at the memory.
Check in a goat? I was starting to think that I was so tired my mind was playing tricks on me.
‘That’s it.’ Trip released a small laugh at the memory. I watched Kendall as she smiled too, like she’d heard the surreal story before.
‘Well, some things don’t change… This time though I’m trying to collect my wife’s pet, any idea where I go?’
I could sense that Nico was as confused as I was, as we carried on walking towards the main building listening to the weird conversation.
‘You’ll need to go out to the cargo facility. I can’t believe your “pet” is still travelling with you.’
‘Oh, you’d better believe it, mate. My wife Aubrey could sell oil to a tycoon.’ He waved at a beautiful red-haired lady who immediately waved back at him.
‘Anyways, thanks for the info, I’ll be seeing ya.’
We all watched as the man jogged back to his wife and placed his arm around her shoulders.
‘You make some strange acquaintances, Trip.’ Nico laughed as he provoked him.
Trip turned his head to look at Nico and with a deadpan expression on his face he answered, ‘You don’t say, Boss?’
Chapter Fourteen
Barbara
The feel of the sand between my toes and listening to the waves as they lapped at the shore was grounding. I hadn’t been this close to the sea since I’d lived in the U.K. as a young child and although that period of my life didn’t have many happy memories, spending time at a beach near to where my dad was stationed was one of them.
It didn’t matter whether it was cold and windy, or warm and sunny like I knew today would eventually be, I found the beach a refreshing and cathartic place to be. One of the only good memories I had of my mom, involved her spinning around and around with her arms open wide as the sea breeze rushed over her. I could hear her voice in my head, see the rapturous smile on her face and her blonde hair as it whipped up and away from her shoulders as she shouted over at Brody and I to join her. Soon we were spinning right beside her while she shouted over the top of the wind to “feel the freedom” while my dad sat on a nearby sandbank and laughed at the three of us.