‘Time to go home, Mrs. Morello.’
The smile that lit up her face, I knew I’d remember for the rest of my life. The sense of panic that quickly followed, bolting through my body at the words I’d just used, I knew I’d remember even longer.
Chapter Seventeen
Bee
‘Time to go home, Mrs. Morello.’
His words and the tone of voice he said them in thrilled me.
I looked up from staring at the gold wedding band he had gently pushed onto my finger to see a smile spreading over his devastatingly handsome face. I knew without a doubt my wedding band had cost far less than the diamond I had pushed onto the same finger a couple of weeks ago, but it meant so very much more. Although I knew that this whole scenario was a charade, I couldn’t help the lump that formed in my throat with the constrained emotion inside of me and the happy skip of my heart.
All I could do was to smile back, and I knew without a doubt my guard had completely evaporated before his all-seeing eyes. I was happy, joyful and excited about our future together and it was completely wrong for the occasion.
For a split second his smile dropped and terror seemed to fill his dark eyes. Recognising he’d somehow slipped up in his own eyes, it was quickly replaced by a well-rehearsed smile he would probably bestow to the people he sat round a table with in a business meeting.
Trip’s voice sounding, as he started to sing a line from what I knew from Kendall’s explanation on the flight over had to be a Beatles song, came from close behind us. Totally out of the blue I heard, ‘I wanna hold your hand.’
Nico twisted his head to look over his shoulder and narrowed his eyes on Trip almost in warning and then burst out laughing.
Thanks to Trip, the tense, horrible moment between us was broken.
We walked back down the hill to Nico’s home, occasionally stopping to have celebratory words spoken to us, and to have Nico’s hand clasped and shaken over exuberantly as the older villagers offered their sincere congratulations on our marriage. Two of them had even pinned money onto my dress despite Nico explaining it wasn’t necessary. But, after a gentle shake of Nonna’s head in reprimand, we’d understood that we had to allow it to happen so as not to offend anyone. The walk in the sunshine, that should have taken ten minutes at the most, stretched to just under an hour, and although I knew our marriage was an arrangement, the longer he held my hand and gently guided me forward, occasionally holding my elbow to offer me support on the unmade road, the more it felt very real.
In truth, I had a rush of last-minute nerves as I’d entered the chapel. We were about to say vows in front of God and although I wasn’t deeply religious, I also wasn’t the sort of person who could make promises in such a holy place without feeling them deeply. But I remembered Nonna’s words about how love could grow from a seed of friendship and when Nico had smiled and then lifted his hand to receive me, my feet travelled on impulse towards him. Apart from when he placed my gold wedding band on my finger his hand hadn’t left mine and when we’d shared our first kiss together as man and wife, the touch of his lips on mine had drowned out everything and anyone else in the small chapel with us.
His kiss had felt like he was accepting me body and soul. With that gentle, chaste kiss of ownership my body had sprung awake feeling more receptive and positive than I could ever remember. When he called me Mrs. Morello in front of the small wedding party, I knew then and there that it was something I wanted to hear fall from his lips for much longer than just the year I knew he was allowing us.
I thought over the words of wisdom his grandmother had imparted to me before the wedding and wondered if I could make this small seed between us grow.
If I wrote down everything about us on paper, I was sure we wouldn’t be compatible. Nico came from the sort of lifestyle you heard about in the media, watched in films and read about in historical literature. Whereas I came from what would be labelled as a regular Joe’s way of life. We had been a young military family that had been posted abroad. Although that was where our regular life had ended. My brother and I had grown up quickly as we fought to survive our mom’s neglect. We had been a family that was eventually driven apart by my mom’s homesickness, subsequent addiction to painkillers and my dad’s refusal to acknowledge that she needed help. I also knew what Nico was, where he came from and what families like his did to retain their success and standing. I understood that he had most definitely ordered things to be done that would terrify and sicken me. He himself had probably done things that I would find abhorrent, I mean the man himself had warned me against him and to not romanticise who he was.
I wasn’t stupid. Sure, I had made some very poor decisions in my life, but no one could accuse me of being naive.
But, so far, all he had shown me was kindness. He appeared to think of others before himself. He truly was a mass of contradictions. A puzzle that I desperately wanted to learn the complexities of.
I knew I had to face facts. I knew what we were.
We were an arrangement born out of convenience.
But every single time he held my hand he made me feel like we were destined to be so much more. I wanted to be more than just a year in his life. I wanted to be more than the person he used to placate his beloved grandmother.
I watched our feet walk side by side over the uneven Crete road and recognised that I wanted to walk by his side always.
I wanted to be his forever.
For once my head and heart were in complete agreement, but having just started therapy for another addiction, I knew I needed to take a complete step back. I had to be sure I wasn’t enabling the addictive personality my new therapist had diagnosed me with, by swapping one addiction with another.
‘On behalf of my wife and I.’ Nico looked down at me and tipped the top of his Champagne flute towards me as he spoke. The completely straight line of his mouth that he normally directed to the world changed when the corners lifted a little with the beginnings of a smile as I wholeheartedly smiled back up at him.
The twenty or so people who had been invited by Nonna, for a dinner on Nico’s pergola and grapevine covered patio to celebrate our marriage, murmured and softly clapped.
‘Well, my wife and I would like to thank you for coming to celebrate our wedding day with us.’ He waited until the small gathering became silent again before he carried on. ‘Bee and I want to especially thank my grandmother for arranging everything for us, for allowing us to have this day.’
Well ain’t that just the truth.
I blinked away my thoughts and like everyone else who seemed to hold the matriarch in high esteem, I raised my glass to her.
‘But I especially want to thank Bee, for marrying me. As I’m sure you will all agree she looks exquisite… alla mia bellissima moglie.’
Again, murmurs of agreement went around the small crowd and although I only knew a few of the faces I found looking at us, I smiled my thanks out to them all.
‘You look beautiful, Bee… far too good for the likes of him,’ Trip shouted out and laughter consumed our small audience.
Everyone knew Trip was joking, all apart from it seemed the man stood beside me. Nico shot him a look with his eyebrow rising so high it nearly touched his hairline and then he continued.