I laugh. “Sit down.” I slide my backpack off and drop it at my feet, wrapping one of the straps around my foot so no one can come along and snatch it when I’m not looking. “This is my luggage.”
He makes a face. “How could you possibly have been away for five days with nothing but your backpack?”
“When you travel a lot and live in tiny spaces, you learn to pare down to what’s really important.”
He sits back down, his expression growing serious. “Yeah, about that. I’ve been doing a lot of thinking. I mean, a lot. I think I might have ground some gears down to the nub.”
I smile and nod. I’m pretty sure I’ve done the same.
The bartender delivers our beers, but neither of us drinks.
“I want to apologize for the way I acted the last time we talked,” he said. “I really don’t have any excuse. I was immature and petty and jealous and I’m really ashamed of myself. I guess, some part of me has been expecting you to realize what a high-maintenance mess I am from day one. The more real your idea became, the more invested I was. And the more invested I was, the more afraid I got. It was like a self-tightening noose.”
His confession touches me, and I reach for his hand, curling both of mine around it. “I didn’t go the extra mile to make you feel any better, and we both know I suck at this relationship thing.”
“Actually, I think you did go the extra mile. I just wasn’t hearing you.” He leans forward and cups my face in his free hand. The emotion in his eyes pries my heart wide open, and it’s terrifying as hell, but I force myself not to retreat into my shell. “I’ve missed you.”
Tears sting my eyes, and I press my lips together to hold them back. “I’ve been pretty miserable too.”
He leans closer and guides me into a kiss. A sweet, heartfelt, connecting kiss that pulls a thousand pounds off my chest.
“I know I put a lot of pressure on you to feel the same way I do,” he says, “but I won’t do it again. We’ll take things at your speed, okay?”
My world rights, and I nod. “I’m still trying to figure it all out.” I run my fingers through the hair at his temple. “How are the girls?”
“Fine. Poppy and Jazz keep asking where you are, and Violet’s been lecturing me about messing things up with you.”
I laugh.
“Tell me about the boat,” he says. “How was it?”
That complicated dreamy feeling spills through me, and I roll my eyes. “Gorgeous. Just freaking gorgeous. And such a great deal.”
He nods, but I can tell he’s working to stay positive. “When are you bringing her home?”
“Yeah, about that,” I say, repeating his words before clearing my throat and diving in. “I decided not to buy her.”
His face drops. “What? Why not?”
“I’ve been doing a lot of thinking too, and I realized there will always be boats available, good deals will always pop up, and the world isn’t going anywhere. It’ll all still be there when the time is right for me to travel.” I have to take a big breath to get the next part out. “But you and the girls won’t be, and I want to be with you more than I want to see the few places I haven’t seen yet.”
“I… What… Wow.”
I laugh, and my chest relaxes. “Eloquent, Dr. Latham.”
“I’m…truly speechless.” He shakes his head. “What are you going to do?”
I kiss him and rest my forehead against his as the rest of the stress finally evaporates. “I’m going to talk to Laiyla and Levi about staying on as an employee after the sale. Or maybe I’ll keep my part of the investment for the time being. All I want is to be with you and the girls. There’s a lot less joy in sailing the world when you can’t share the experience with the people you love most.”
He searches my eyes with a kind of love I’ve never seen before. And I’m grateful when he doesn’t ask me to expand on that expression of love I just admitted to, one that includes him. I’m still not quite ready to delve that deeply yet. But he kisses me, long and sweet, and I know he understands.
When he pulls back, he’s got a quirky little smile on his lips. “The girls and I did something while you were gone.”
“Uh-oh.” I laugh and pick up my beer. “That sounds like trouble to me.”
“You can blame Violet. She’s the one who started the whole thing.”
After a long drink, I say, “That girl’s pretty imaginative.”
“For sure.”
“What did you do?”
“We kinda went for a test run on the catamaran Jaime showed us in Santa Barbara.”
My eyes go wide. “Nuh-uh.”
“Uh-huh.” His smile is bright.
“What did you think?”
“I wish you could have been there. It was…” He shakes his head. “Exhilarating, thrilling, fun as hell.”
Now I can’t stop smiling. “What about the girls? What did they think?”
“They didn’t want to get off. They’ve begged me to buy it every day since we came home.”
I laugh. “I wonder if they know just how much they run our lives, not the other way around.”
“Violet’s picking up on it. God help us when the others do too.”
Us. God help us.
It’s the sweetest word I’ve heard in forever. “I’m so happy they loved it.”
“And then,” he says, drawing out the words, “I did something else.”
I pull in a sharp breath and tent my hands over my mouth. “You didn’t buy it.”
“Not…exactly.”
“Not exactly? You either did or you didn’t.”
“I found one that was perfect and made an offer.” He pulls a piece of paper from the pocket of his hoodie and flattens it on the bar. “It’s just an offer. I knew I had to talk to you about everything before I went through with it.”
My stomach is flipping like a fish as I look over the contract. “This isn’t just perfect, Ben, it’s new. Brand-fucking-new.” I cut a look at him. “Do you know how insanely cool these new ones are? The entire top level—”
“Slides down,” he says, “fitting inside the lower level until the roof and the deck are flush, effectively making it bulletproof when you’re away. Yeah, I know.”
I’m having a hard time breathing as I turn the pages looking over all the bells, whistles, and top-of-the-line features on this boat. Then my gaze falls on the final price, and I frown. I turn the paper over, then thumb through the pages again, looking for something I’ve missed. When I can’t find anything, I meet his gaze. “Where’s the catch? This is way underpriced, by like, a hundred grand. Is it missing an engine? What?”
“No, it’s not missing the engine,” he says, laughing. “And it’s seventy-five grand less than sticker. You can thank Jaime for that. He said it was overpriced to begin with, so the savings isn’t as dramatic as it appears, but he pulled in one of many favors he is evidently owed by people in the industry.” He shrugs. “Of course, he did it for you, not me.”