She gives me a huge nod and a pleased smile. “Yep. Every word. I was a zygote when I wrote it,” she laughs. “Total teenager with a big heart and a lot of romance in my head that was yet to be realized. What about yours?”
I tell her about Jasper’s poetry. About the album he wrote for Vi and how that didn’t stop me from capturing and claiming her as mine.
“But…” I watch as she tilts her head, scrunching her eyebrows and taking another sip of her drink. Naomi Kent is a lightweight and it’s so insanely cute I can hardly stand it. “You knew?”
I nod, offering her a wan grin, feeling just a little more like an asshole for it.
“And…”
I shrug again.
“Wow. Just wow.” Then she leans back and smiles so brightly I wonder if the sun that’s setting on the horizon is jealous. “But now…”
I nod. Because there isn’t a whole lot else to say. I made sure Jasper got the girl in the end and that’s all I can do.
“Does it break your heart, Gus?”
Naomi dips her finger along her salt rim, licking at the brine and pinning me with the saddest of sad eyes, that smile she had going only seconds ago, slipping.
“No. Viola always should have been Jasper’s. I stepped in and messed a lot of things up. I don’t regret my relationship with her. I don’t regret the way I loved her. I don’t regret the time I spent with her as mine. The only things I regret are the way I treated her, the length of time it took me to grow some balls and bring her back into our lives, and the fact that I didn’t tell Jasper the truth from the start.”
Our shots are delivered as these words hang in the air between us, and I think Naomi is grateful for that. Because Naomi has a lot of demons. And those demons broke a lot of pieces of her heart. And those demons still pick at her soul. I mean, think of the freaking songs this girl just spoke about?
Our waitress smiles at me, grins at Naomi, and then walks off. Naomi lifts her slender glass, filled with clear liquid up to me. I do the same, but instead of the cheers I expect, something along the lines of, to new friendships or surviving our pasts, she just tosses it down her throat. I blink at her, slightly stunned and follow after her. Naomi sputters out a dry cough, hacking slightly, and chasing the mild tequila down with large gulps of water.
“Another?” she asks, and I tilt my head, staring at her.
“Beautiful girl, what on earth are you so afraid of?”
She lets off a nervous laugh, taking a large gulp of her margarita and searching over my shoulder in the direction of our waitress. “Those nachos are taking forever. I’m starving.”
“Talk to me,” I implore, reaching across our small raised table on the edge of the railing and taking her hand. “Tell me what has you so jittery right now and wanting to drink like a fish. Why you can write the melody to our duet, but not the words.”
She swallows and slowly shifts until her gaze is back on mine. “He left me because drugs meant more to him than I did. I’ve been alone for a very long time, Gus. And I was doing okay with that—sort of. I mean, it’s not great, but it’s my life and I’m handling it. But then…the other day…I think I’m just a little jealous of the love you and Jasper have for Viola. Of the lengths you’ve both gone to for her. For each other. Stupid, right?”
She lets off a small laugh, but it’s awkward and self-conscious.
And…yep, a part of me just turned into a murderous bastard.
“Where is he now?” I’m not even kidding. I will end him.
She shakes her head, and I stare helplessly as her eyes grow glassy. “I’m serious, Gus.” So am I, Naomi. “I knew Florian was using heroin. I had caught him, and he promised to stop. My father died of it, you know?” I nod because everyone knows that. “I found my father in a hotel bathroom and I just…”
My beautiful girl trails off, covering her mouth with her hand so she doesn’t audibly sob, and just what the fuck? Why her?
She clears her throat. Composes herself. “So, when I caught Florian with a needle in his hand after all that, after he promised to stop, I went a little nuts. But,” sigh, “you know…”
I do know. “He broke up with you?”
“He did. Or I broke up with him. I don’t even know anymore. But then the whole Grammys thing happened. And then…”
“Was there more?”
She turns away, staring out into the blue-gray waters of the Pacific that’s on the angrier side today as it crashes into the stilts of the pier, spraying mist up into the air. “Yes.” The tone of her voice tells me instantly not to go there. Not to question. “Shit, this was supposed to be us having fun and I did it again.” She turns back to me. “I’m so sick and tired of being sad. Of talking about Florian and thinking about all the places my life went off track.” She shakes her head, her dark hair flying every which way before she scrubs her hands through it, rustling it up as she blows out a breath. “Okay, no more sad. I promise. We’re writing this song, Gus, but I seriously don’t want to talk about the shit behind it anymore.”
“I ditto that.”
Then something hits me in the chest.
Hard.
Like a goddamn two-by-four.
I want to do this duet, but I’m starting to think that’s only because of the woman sitting across from me. Suddenly, all that was so important, so necessary to get out and off my chest, isn’t weighing me down as it once did.
I could fall for Naomi—and it’s starting to seriously scare the crap out of me.
I flag our waitress down and order two more shots because what the hell. I think I need them, and Naomi obviously does too. I’ll make sure she gets home safe. I’ll take care of her, and really, when was the last time she lost control? Let herself go and put faith in another?
“I’m not marrying you tonight, no matter how drunk you get me.” She laughs after she hears me order those shots.
“Not tonight, but another night, you can count on it.”
She laughs some more, rolling her eyes, thinking I’m kidding. Am I?
“I-I loved you more than the rest. Our story an endless treasure chest.
But you threw it out to sea. Along with it, a part of me.”
I grin like a crazy man. Hell…she’s composing.
“My heartache battles time. A broken piece, a shattered lie.”
I wave my hand out to her. “And yet here you are. Sitting with me in this bar.”
She lets off a small giggle and throws me a wink.
“It’s a risk I’ll take. Our joined hearts make me quake.
So, let me see all we’re meant to be. Where this song will carry me.”
I clap for her and she gives me a small bow.
“I like it,” I tell her.
She bites into her lip and then shakes her head. “We didn’t write it down.”
“Nope. We’ll see if we can remember any of it tomorrow after we’ve been drinking all night.”
Her eyes shoot open wide just as our huge plate of nachos are delivered along with our second round of shots. She eyes everything in front of us before asking, “All night?”
“Could be fun.”
“And messy. I’m mostly a one glass of wine girl.”