I stared at them in silence for a moment as I wrapped my head around what they were challenging me to do.
“Look at it this way,” Collette said, her voice kind and gentle. “If he doesn’t feel the same way, then at least you’ll know and you can move on, right?”
I gave a short nod. She was right. I knew she was right. And yet, that didn’t really make me feel better at all.
I saw the moment Bianca decided to change tactics. Her expression hardened and that glimmer of humanity was replaced with the hard-as-nails prima ballerina facade she’d perfected over the years. “Eve Lawson, are you a quitter?”
I blinked. “What?”
She pursed her lips as she eyed me from head to toe. “I never took you for a quitter. Even when you lost your position at the academy, I had no doubt that you would do whatever it took to take part-time classes and one day get back on track for your career as a dancer.”
I blinked again like a moron, completely confused by this conversation’s turn.
“So, tell me, Eve,” she continued. “Are you going to give up now before you’ve even tried? Are you going to wuss out like a coward rather than confront Cooper on whatever this is going on between you two?”
She arched her brows as if waiting for an answer.
I still couldn’t tell if I was being yelled at or applauded. Her tone was super scary but her words were kind of...nice.
They were also true.
Sure, I was known for being sweet. Everyone knew I was shy. But I’d always prided myself on being strong. Brave, even. I wasn’t a quitter, and I definitely wasn’t a coward.
I could feel my shoulders going back, my spine straightening, as her words took hold and gave me strength.
Collette was biting her lips, watching me with eager anticipation. Bianca still looked like she was waiting for a response to her challenge.
Was I going to be a coward?
I stood taller. No. No, I wasn’t. I shoved my plastic cup toward Collette. “Hold my punch.”
“Yes! That’s our girl.” Collette’s cheer followed me, giving my legs some much needed strength to move forward despite the fact that my knees were weak and my belly churned with nerves.
No, not just nerves. This was fear, plain and simple.
My mouth went dry and my palms grew clammy as I cut through the crowd toward the group of football players hovering by the side exit.
Cooper spotted me coming. Of course he did, he’d been watching me nonstop since we’d arrived.
That had to mean something, right?
The thought was heartening. It gave me hope. But just as quickly that hope just heightened my fear because the higher my hopes, the harder the fall if I was wrong.
There was every chance I was misreading his looks, his reactions, his words, his silences.
It wouldn’t be the first time.
But whether I was misreading them or not, that was beside the point. The point was that it was time to clear the air once and for all. The point was, I was done hiding from my feelings and I deserved to know one way or the other if there was something real between us or if it was all in my head.
I drew in a deep breath as I sidled past a group of giggling girls and then there was nothing between me and Cooper.
He wasn’t even pretending to pay attention to guys who were laughing about something beside him. He’d angled his body so he was facing me, his gaze was locked on mine, his body was tensed and ready, like he was expecting me to greet him with a slap across the face.
It was tempting, if I was being honest. Frustration that had been simmering beneath the surface these last few weeks threatened to morph into rage.
“We need to talk,” I said the moment I drew near.
He hesitated for a heartbeat before giving me a short nod.
I led him out to the dance floor and then suddenly turned, catching him off guard. He reached out and wrapped his hand around my arm as if he feared I would fall over. The heat from his hands on my skin caused me to sharply suck in my breath. It was like being touched by electricity. Sharp and painful.
My gaze snapped down to his hand and then back up to him. He pulled his hand back as if I’d burned him and that action just made me angrier than I already was. Instead of letting him pull back, I clasped his fingers with my right hand and settled my left hand onto his shoulder. I stepped closer to him so there were only inches between us.
I could feel his hesitation as he stood there, not touching me. Not looking at me.
So I waited. I waited for him to realize that I wasn’t going anywhere. That he was going to touch me. That he was going to have to face me and whatever this was between us. He was going to have to look at me at some point.
I never realized how life altering it would feel to have Cooper slip his hand to my waist and settled on my lower back until it happened. A rush of shivers cascaded across my body as he brought our joined hands up to his chest and held them close to his heart.
I was speechless as he began swaying to the music. I’d been so determined to get him to look at me—to acknowledge me—that when he actually did it, my entire brain ceased to function.
And there we stood, holding each other and dancing. The ballad was soft and the voice of the singer surrounded us. I could feel his pain with each word he sang. It matched the pain coursing through my body right now. As much as I loved being held by Cooper, I feared what was going to happen when the song ended and he pulled back. The wall would be built up and I would be alone, again.
So I parted my lips and took the leap that Bianca and Collette had talked about. The leap that put my heart on the line and forced Cooper to acknowledge me.
“I like you,” I whispered. I was staring hard at Cooper’s chest from fear that if I looked up, I would die right here.
Cooper stopped moving and his entire body stiffened.
I blinked a few times. My head felt displaced from my body. Like I was floating above myself, screaming down about how much of an idiot I was.
He didn’t respond. But then again, his silence was his response. After a few more seconds it became clear that his silence was the only response I was going to get and it could only mean one thing.
He didn’t feel the same.
He was rejecting me, plain and simple.
Not sure how to move on from my confession, I did the only thing I could think of. I pulled away from Cooper and ran. Ran to the gymnasium doors, down the hallway, and outside.
I’m not sure, but there was a moment where I swore I heard Cooper call my name. As much as I didn’t want that to influence me, it did. So much so that as soon as I reached the sidewalk that lined the side of the school, I stopped.
No one was out here, though the sound of students hanging out in the nearby parking lot reached me with the occasional laugh and shout. The music inside was audible but muffled.
Before I had time to turn around, I could feel Cooper behind me. His breath was heavy and I could feel his heat emanating from him. It angered me that I was so acutely aware of his presence.
“Eve,” he said, his voice deep and pained. His hand surrounded my arm and in one swift movement, he whipped me around. I was standing inches away from him. I couldn’t help but glace up to meet his gaze. I sucked in my breath as I took in his dark and hooded eyes. They were impossible to read, but so far from being cold and icy, it was a wonder I’d ever believed he didn’t care.
So why couldn’t he say what he was feeling? I hated this limbo I was living in. Trying to interpret Cooper’s feelings based on his actions was like trying to nail Jell-o to the wall. Just when I thought I had him figured out, he would take a step back. I chewed my bottom lip as I struggled to find the words to take back what I’d just confessed, and then...I saw it.