“I did.” He dropped her hand and scooted over, putting more space between them.
“I’m sorry,” she said automatically. “I’m just… This is hard for me to hear. I understand, though, and appreciate you telling me.”
He nodded.
They sat in silence for a while, both lost in their own thoughts until Joy blurted, “This conversation isn’t why you came by today.”
“Nope. Not even close.” Paul rubbed his eyes and let out a long breath. “I was wrong to come tearing over here like that.”
“So why did you, exactly?” she asked curiously. “That’s not usually like you.”
He hung his head. “I saw all that crap in the paper and just lost my mind. The thought of having our family business out there for everyone to see and comment on terrified me, and I took it out on you.”
“You realize none of that is true, right?” she said testily. “It’s made-up garbage to sell gossip rags.”
“Yeah. I do now.” He turned to eye her. “I’m sorry. I’m actually really proud of you for chasing your dream. When it comes down to it, that’s part of the reason I decided it was time for us to go our separate ways. I wanted you to have the freedom to live your life, to blossom into the person I always knew you were supposed to be.”
What a load of crap, Joy thought to herself. She wasn’t buying any of his rationalizations about why he left. It was clear to her that he needed to get out for him. Whatever his issues were, his sexuality or realization that he needed to live a different life, he did it for him. Maybe he thought he was being noble and giving her the space she needed for a new life, but he’d hurt her deeply by shutting her out so completely the last years of their lives together. If he’d really left for her, she absolutely deserved to have had a say in it. But he hadn’t given her the option. And now it was done.
The thing was, she just didn’t want to talk about it anymore. If he needed to frame it as if he’d done something good for her to make himself feel better, she was willing to let him have that. She’d come to terms with her life without him. It was time for them both to just move on.
“So, what are you doing for a social life these days?”
A slow smile claimed his lips, and a tiny spark lit his gaze. “Lots of golf, a weekly poker game, and I’ve taken up fly fishing out in the river. It turns out I love spending hours out there.”
“That makes sense.” He’d always been one to enjoy his solitude. She patted his knee and rose from the swing. “I’m glad. You seem more at peace.”
“I am.”
He got to his feet and followed her back into the house.
Joy led him to the front door and patted his chest. “Thank you for being honest. That explains a lot.”
“I guess it would.”
She gave him a small smile. “You and I are good, Paul. Just remember that your children have their own issues to work out, and yelling at them about their life choices isn’t going to help them get past this. Try to be patient and understanding, okay?”
He pursed his lips and narrowed his eyes at her. “It would help if you had my back.”
This time she didn’t bother to hide her eyeroll. “Paul, if you had any idea how many times I’ve stood up for you, you’d be kissing my feet. I’ve told them repeatedly that whatever happened between us didn’t have anything to do with them and that you still love them. Now it’s up to you to take it from here. Got it?”
“Um, yeah. Got it.” He gave her one of his big hugs, apologized, and then left.
Joy watched until he drove off and then quietly shut the door on their past.
Chapter Seventeen
Life was funny sometimes. Joy had spent her morning listening to her ex have a temper tantrum over bullshit that he should’ve seen through right away. And then that same night she found herself in a gorgeous beach house, tucked in the corner of an incredibly comfortable leather couch, while a very sexy man handed her a dirty martini. A fire crackled in the fireplace, setting the mood for an epic romance.
“Thank you.” Joy smiled at Troy, thankful that her voice had returned. It had been scratchy most of the day, but after Gigi called to check on her, she’d heard the problem and delivered a tonic that had cleared it right up. She took a sip of the martini and said, “It’s perfect. Did you tend bar in college or something?”
“Actually it was after college.” His face lit up with the memory. “It was a small town Back East, and that’s how I paid my rent while I did my apprenticeship with a world-renowned photographer. He was a complete ass, so it was nice to have a place to go blow off steam even if I was the one behind the bar.”
“And you said your mother taught you to cook, right?” Troy had been true to his word. He was an extremely good cook and had made them salmon risotto. It was by far the best risotto she’d ever had, and she might have moaned her way through the meal.
Troy nodded and took a sip of his beer. “My mom was a chef. She had her own restaurant, and I used to help her out on weekends.”
“You are a man of many talents.” Joy ran her gaze over him and didn’t miss the spark of heat that flashed in his eyes.
“Right back at ya, Joy Lansing. Model, actress, psychic, and fantastic mother. Tell me, is there anything you can’t do?”
“Well, as it turns out, I’m not great at outrunning the paparazzi. Those bastards managed to take the most unflattering picture of me on the planet. I also flashed the world my underpants, so there’s that.” She raised her glass to him in a mock toast. But when he didn’t touch his glass to hers, she frowned. “Is there something wrong?”
“What? No.” He shook his head. “Of course not.” He eyed her and added, “That picture wasn’t that bad. At least your legs looked good.”
She rolled her eyes and threw a pillow at him. “So you saw the article?”
His good humor vanished, and his eyes flashed with a hint of darkness. “I saw it. It was everything that is wrong with the entertainment industry. I’m sorry, Joy. You and your son didn’t deserve that.”
“No, we didn’t,” she agreed. “But Kyle’s fine. I guess there are advantages to growing up in the social media age. He’s really good at blocking stuff out and just going on with his life. Me, on the other hand… I was ready to go down to that office and tear some heads off.”
“I hear you.” He reached out and slipped his fingers through hers. “You didn’t do that, though, did you?”
“Of course not. That would just feed the story.” She shrugged one shoulder. “It’s not like the Premonition Perspective is a national gossip magazine. I’m hoping that if we all continue to ignore them that their lies won’t spread when the movie comes out.”
He grimaced.
“I see you think that’s naïve,” she said.
Troy tipped his beer to his lips and sucked down half the contents before he answered. “Maybe. But that’s only because I’ve been on the receiving end of some really nasty stories. I did what you are doing right now. I ignored them, hoping they’d go away. But they never did. Or at least not until I disappeared for a while.”