1
I landed on the soft ground on my hands and knees.
I didn’t think you’d be able to move that fast, but I guess when you’ve got a star struck little cunt on the hook.
My gut twisted viciously, my breath coming in pants as I rode out the spasm.
Billy got his claws into her early…
I groaned as bile flooded my mouth, tears pricking at my eyes. That godawful ache of nausea rose like a wave.
He can do all the softly, softly stuff I’ve got no fucking time for…
“No, no,” I pleaded with my body, but I knew what was coming.
…pushing her to do what she wanted to do all along is exhausting frankly.
And that was it. My stomach lurched and filled my mouth with bile, my whole body convulsing as it forced the meagre contents out onto the grass. I choked, spat out the last of it, fighting for breath, feeling my tender muscles tense, ready for another go.
No, no, no.
“My flower, my sweet…”
I peered up through tear-filled eyes to see Aen looming over me. I scuttled away from him like vermin would, away from my vomit, his feet, his gaze, and curled up into a tight ball when he kept on coming.
“Get away from me,” I ground out, every muscle in my body flinching as he ignored my words.
“Kira…”
“No!” I hated the sound of my voice, the ragged, tear clogged tone, the hysterical edge. I hated the way my body, my head, ached. I hated the tears that burned like battery acid as they leaked out, the way my chest seized, only letting my breath come in fits and starts. And most of all, I hated them.
It was a lie—all of it. The relationships, the alliances, the bond, the photography, everything. I’d always felt like I was just an eye behind a camera, but now, I was nothing.
“NO!” I shrieked when Aen touched me. I hauled myself up, swaying on my feet, unable to catch my balance, and he tried to swoop in and help. My head felt a million times too big, my eyes swollen into slits as the tears streamed down my face. But I stumbled, away from him, away from all these fucking faeries that seemed intent on plaguing my life. My chest ached so much, and my hand rubbed reflexively at my sternum, a pathetic seeking of comfort when there was going to be none.
That conversation had taken everything I’d thought I’d gained and more besides. I had no parents, no home, no family, no friends, no position, no protection, no skill or art. I was just a lowly little fae battery, useful only for draining. I tried to scan the pretty field of wildflowers we were standing in, in case there were more predators out there lurking, but there was only Aen.
“Kira…”
He said my name with his arms held out to the sides, moving slowly, as if not to spook me, but that wasn’t it. I wasn’t scared of him. I just wanted this fucking farce to end.
“No, nope, we are not doing this. I want you to fuck right off, now.”
“Kira…”
I hated that he kept on coming. I hated that he wrapped his arms around me. I hated the screams and cries that came out of me as he did so, that my nails raked at his skin. Most of all, I hated how much better I felt when my head came to rest on his chest.
So I clung to that—my hatred. It burned so brightly inside me, I was nothing but a charred husk, but I didn’t care. Scour me out, empty it all, burn it all down, I told myself, part promise, part prophecy.
By some faerie magic, we were relocated from the flower field into a house somewhere, my skin feeling instantly cooler. I was moved over to a large bed and laid down on the surface, a blanket pulled over me, providing a soft reassuring weight. This was followed by him not long afterwards.
“Sshh…” he said, over and over as I cried into the pillow. “Sshh…” he said as he stroked my hair. “It’s OK, love. It’ll all be OK.”
2
I woke some time later to an empty stomach and an empty head. The light coming in through the windows was harsh against my swollen eyes, but I refused to look away, even as I felt the pain in my head stab harder, the squiggles at the edges of my vision returning.
“You’re awake, my—”
The door opened, and Aen stood there in the doorway, a pretty fixture of fae temptation. Those ubiquitous leather pants hung low on those narrow hips, his shirt discarded as superfluous at some point, that muscular chest on display. I jerked my eyes away.
“If you were about to describe me as either vegetation or an insect, fucking save it,” I said, fighting my way free of the bedding. “It’s Kira. It’s literally my name. Use it.”
“Very well, Kira. There’s someone here to talk to you.”
It felt like an icy hand reached into my chest and squeezed my heart mercilessly, until I started coughing.
“It’s not—” Slash, rake across my skin. “You have never met. She wants to—”
“She? Already sounds like an improvement,” I snapped, straightening up. I went to walk into the other room, but he stayed where he was, giving me only enough space to squeeze past. I shot him a dark look as our bodies brushed, then I walked out into an expansive living area. I was standing in a house with a panoramic view of the valley below, framed perfectly by the wall of windows in front of me. A house built into the side of a mountain from what I could tell. But while the view was amazing, it wasn’t what drew my eyes. It was her.
Elegant as a queen, a black woman sat on a chair, hands folded neatly in her lap, back ramrod straight. She noted my emergence, but did little to respond, other than smile her Mona Lisa smile.
“And who are you?” I asked.
I could hear Aen spluttering in the background, but her gaze when it landed on the two of us stopped us without a comment. Her eyes were a rich brown, almost bronze coloured, but that wasn’t what held our attention. It was like looking at the wisdom of the world, a kind of thrumming, peaceful certainty that had me stepping closer, cocking my head, examining the rest of her, and she tolerated my inspection with equanimity. I got the feeling that nothing but what she chose would faze her, something that only made me stare more. She hadn’t said a word, but already, I was fascinated.
“Ashanti,” she replied finally, gesturing to a chair for me to sit. I did, much to my surprise. When she turned, she went to a tray of refreshments that wasn’t there a moment ago, pouring drinks and putting one before me. “And you are Kira.”
“Yeah.”
“You are in pain.”
I’d picked up the glass, ready to take a big mouthful of whatever was in it, my mouth filled with the sour taste of vomit and morning breath. My hand froze.
“You question where you fit, your worth.”
The tumbler was put down with a clunk, some of the liquid spilling on the table top. Her eyes traced its path, so mine did too.
“I can help you, Kira.”
“Yeah?” I flopped back in my chair. “Will you finally explain what the freaking deal with my scent is and how to use my power? Will you teach me to smite my enemies, bring those pricks to their knees? Can you make me so fucking powerful, no one’s ever gonna mess with me again?”
“Kira—” Aen said.
“All that and more,” she promised.
“Are you going to answer all my questions? Help me understand this fucked up world? Keep nothing from me?”