He’d be alone again, but with a broken heart…just like Bryce.
He couldn’t ever let that happen.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Mari came down to the hall in the morning to find four men asleep in chairs by the hearth. Well, two of them were not men yet, but they were on their way. Cam and Lachlan dozed, each with a twin sleeping in his arms.
Seeing Cam with Lachlan’s boy brought back the concerns and wishes she’d been feeling the night before. How she longed to see Cameron holding their own child while they slept peacefully.
But Mari didn’t think it could ever happen. She could be carrying his child this very moment, so that part of the dream was possible. What she doubted was her ability to give her family any kind of peace.
Safety and tranquility were the things she’d longed for over the years. But in securing her safety, she’d sentenced herself to being hunted down and put to death. Which in turn put her entire family in danger.
It seemed the worst kind of irony.
Cam’s eyes opened, and he smiled, scattering her worries for the time being. When he looked at her like that, she couldn’t think. Could barely breathe.
“Good morning, wife,” he said quietly, holding out a hand toward her. The other hand held the sleeping twin.
He pulled her closer, and she sat on his free knee.
“One can almost think them angels while they sleep,” he teased.
“They are angels.” She picked up the boy’s hand as Cam made a sound of disagreement. She laughed and relented. “Which means they are normal, active little boys.”
“Demons, in other words.” Cam brushed the black hair away from the child’s forehead and placed a kiss there. “I would give my life for them without a thought, and they are not even mine. I canna imagine what it would feel like, the bond with a child of our own.”
“I imagine it would be much the same. Maybe more intense. You would protect them body and soul from anything that threatened.”
Mari couldn’t help but think her presence was the biggest threat to these boys, her husband, and her clan. How much time did she have before she’d need to make a fateful decision?
Years? Days? Mere hours? Before a messenger delivered the grim news that Sir Ridley was there with orders from King Charles to take her back to England…
“You were smiling, and now it’s gone. What’s amiss?” Cam asked.
She shook her head and let out a breath. “Nothing. Nothing to worry about now.”
It was true they didn’t need to find a solution that instant. They could enjoy a quiet moment with their nephews.
Someday soon, however, they would need to make a plan. To prepare for the worst.
For now, she was content to take some breakfast to her sister and help with the new babe. She gave her husband a kiss and rose.
From the window in her sister’s room an hour later, she watched him running drills below with his men. A smile full of pride pulled at her lips. He moved so gracefully, and yet she knew well the man was lethal. Like the flames of a fire that could draw you in by their mesmerizing colors but burn you with that same beauty.
“You may want to wipe the drool from your chin before you get a spot on your dress,” Kenna said from her place on the bed.
Mari didn’t pretend she wasn’t in danger of such a thing. But fortunately not at the moment. She went to sit on the edge of the bed while her sister nursed wee Cameron.
Kenna wiped away wetness from her cheeks, but Mari knew they were happy tears. She’d come to recognize them in the past month.
“I couldn’t ask for anything more than I have on this day. Did you ever think we’d be so happy?” Kenna asked, her eyes brimming over with it.
“Our father didn’t give us a great example of happiness. But I remember Mama. She was happy despite being married to Papa. Perhaps Father was happy with her and I don’t recall. Still, our home was nothing like here.” Mari fell quiet as she remembered the worries that were never far from her thoughts.
“What is it?” Kenna asked.
But Mari refused to ruin the perfect moment. She pasted a fierce smile on her face and said, “Nothing is wrong. How could it be when we are celebrating this precious new life?”
Her enthusiasm must have shown false, for Kenna reached out to touch her hand. “You are safe here. No one can take you from us.”
Mari wanted to believe her fervent words, but the truth of the matter was that the king of England did have that power. And no one could refuse the king.
…
Cam knew something was amiss with his wife. She’d been tired after staying up with Kenna, but three days later, Mari still wasn’t herself.
When he asked, she assured him she was fine with a brittle smile he thought might crack into pieces before him. He’d hoped it was fatigue. But he could guess the true cause of her distress.
She was worrying.
He understood. He was worried, too. It was only natural. With each day they grew closer, but there was a good chance that everything they’d built together could come to a sudden stop and be ripped away.
Lach had reached out to a few people to see if something could be done legally to protect Mari. In the meantime, Cam had plotted out three possible escape routes from the MacKinlay lands. In the next few weeks, he rode them at night to make sure he knew the way in the cover of darkness. He rode during the day, as well, looking for places to hide along the way so as not to be discovered.
His planning missions kept him away from their bed until well after Mari was asleep. He missed her. He missed her genuine smile. She was lovely when she smiled. But her smiles had been all but absent lately.
He hoped someday he’d be able to give her a reason to smile again, and this time for good.
…
When Mari woke one morning, she found Cam sitting on the edge of the bed gazing down at her. In the past weeks he’d been gone when she woke, off on some secret mission outside the castle. He hadn’t invited her to ride with him, and he’d been gone well into the night.
He hadn’t made love to her, either, and a small, silly part of her worried he’d found company in the bed of another woman. But in truth, she knew him better than that. He was an honorable man. Far more honorable than the supposed proper gentleman she’d been married to before.
She took a good look at her husband sitting there in his best shirt and plaid, with an unreadable look about him. His hair was combed back neatly instead of in the wavy locks he normally wore.
“What is it?” she asked, sitting up.
“Will you come for a ride with me this morning?” he asked, not meeting her eyes.