Tears continued to stream down her cheeks, dripping off her chin. She’d known he would hate her for her decision, but she’d thought—in time—he’d understand and think her courageous for protecting their people.
“Can you really look at Douglas, or Roddy, or wee Cameron, and condemn them to death in exchange for me?”
“There had to be another way. This…this is madness.” Running a hand through his hair, he turned back to her. “When will it happen?” he asked, his voice dropping in anguish.
“Excuse me?”
“I was sent all over this goddamned place to find you. The whole time I expected to do nothing more than retrieve your body to bring it home for a proper burial. In a way, I thought it a blessing not to have to see it done. But I’m here now and find you’re still alive. I’ll be there with you. Whatever you face, I’ll not leave you here alone.” His voice caught, and he swallowed heavily. “How much time do we have? We’ll relish every minute together.”
She wished there was a better way—a better time—to tell him, but there wasn’t.
She took a deep breath and plunged right in. “My trial has been postponed until after I give birth to our child.”
Cam looked at her, blinking. Then his eyes went wide. “A child?”
She was immediately grabbed up into his large, strong arms. As quickly as she’d been drawn against him, she was forced back a few steps. He held her firmly to keep her steady on her feet. “Tell me you didn’t turn yourself over to them knowing you carried our child?” He looked as though he would break in a thousand pieces.
“No. I didn’t know until after I arrived here.” She let out a breath and twisted her fingers. “I wish I could tell you it would have made a difference. That maybe I would have stayed, but I don’t think that’s true.” She shook her head. “The babe and I are but two people compared to the lives of the entire clan. Everyone who lifted weapons in our defense would have been struck down. The ones left would have been starved out or worse. Don’t you see? I will lose no matter what choice I make. At least this way, I will face what is to come knowing I’ve protected those I love. You and our child will be safe. That is what matters most.”
Cam’s eyes had gone dark, and it was clear he wanted to argue. Instead, he reached for her again and held her close, gentler this time. “You are a brave woman, Mari. We have been given a great gift, along with more time together. Let’s not waste it in discord.”
She leaned back, resting her chin on his broad chest so she could look up at him. Gone were the darkness, fear, and worry in his face. Though, she knew they simmered just under the surface of the wide smile he offered now.
“I’m going to be a father.” The smile faltered slightly. “Do ye think I’ll do it well?”
Placing her hand over his heart, she spoke the truest words she’d ever spoken. “You’ll be the best father in all the world.”
Chapter Thirty-Three
Cam and Mari had been granted a reprieve, and he promised himself he wouldn’t waste a single moment with sadness over what was to come. The months would go by fast enough, and soon the time would come to face what came next. They could grieve and cry and rail against it then. For now they would celebrate the joy of impending parenthood.
Cam had never wanted to be a husband or a father, but he found both to be comforting. Life had a way of giving a person the things they should have rather than what they thought they wanted.
He placed his hand on Mari’s belly, sending wishes of health and happiness.
“Let’s live these days as if we have a hundred years to follow. We’ll not speak of a future beyond the next day, and the next.”
It had worked for them in the past. Those days they’d been happy together and had put their fears aside so they could focus on their love.
She nodded in agreement. “Yes.”
Before he’d had a moment to request a bite to eat or a place to wash, she’d launched herself at him. With her arms around his neck and her legs around his waist, she kissed him so hard he stumbled from the attack.
Then a different hunger took over. “Where do you sleep in this place?”
She pointed toward the stairs and he took them two at a time. At the top, she gestured toward the end of the hallway. “Last on the right.”
He made his way down the never-ending corridor, vaguely noticing the stern faces on the paintings along the way. Apparently, the previous dukes of Endsmere didn’t approve of a man ravishing his wife in their corridors. They could all go to the devil.
He sat her on the edge of a fancy bed draped in the finest fabrics. She already had his belt undone and was tugging at his kilt when he stayed her with a hand on hers.
“This isn’t the bed you shared—”
“No. I never stayed in this room until I returned.”
That was all he needed to know. He gave in to his growing desire and rose over his wife as she wriggled under him. He rested at her entrance and then stopped.
“The babe?”
“Will be fine.” She shifted, pulling him down, and he went gladly.
The first time was rushed and frantic. He was just so overjoyed to find her alive and carrying his babe. He couldn’t contain his happiness. The second time, he was able to make it last. He treasured every touch and smile between them.
Afterward, lying there with her in his arms, he had no choice but to face the reason he had fled his home to come to this godforsaken place for this woman.
Cameron MacKinlay—the war chief of Clan MacKinlay—was in love with a tiny duchess on trial for murder.
Fate had a cruel sense of humor.
Later, after they rested a bit, Mari requested a tray be brought up for their dinner. The meal they received was hardly enough for him, let alone to share with a woman who was increasing. Even so, he’d pushed more of the food on her, wanting to keep her healthy. Now, as dawn made its claim on the day, he silently gathered his dusty clothes to go forage for breakfast before he grew weak with hunger.
He didn’t know how to go about a meal in London. He hoped to find the kitchens and gather what he needed himself. He’d take enough to feed Mari as well, so they could keep to their bed as long as possible. There in her room they were safe from the truth of the situation. It was easy enough to pretend they were back in Dunardry, despite the fancy bedclothes, the fabrics on the walls, and the elaborate bed.
At the bottom of the stairs he encountered a man standing next to an open door. In Cam’s haste to be with his wife, he’d forgotten to ask if she was alone in the house.
The man was impeccably dressed, with a haughty demeanor. His eyes remained straight ahead. Cam looked down at himself and decided he looked a mess. It was no wonder the man didn’t care to glance his way.