He left a trail of kisses over her jaw and to her mouth, her lips parting instantly to give him access. She tasted of coffee and chocolate and Mariah.
At some point, they must have drifted across the room in each other's arms because they were now lying on his childhood bed, like so many times before, only this time he was a grown man and she didn't have to be home by midnight. He could make love to her all night long.
"Oh my God! I knew it! You two are back together."
He'd been so lost in kissing Mariah that he hadn't heard the click of the door or noticed the shaft of light from the hallway. Dragging his lips from hers, he lifted his head to snarl a reply to his nosy sister Liza but Mariah beat him to it. She pushed at his shoulders so he had to roll away and she sat up, fussing with the neckline of her sundress.
"Liza, I love you like a sister. I'd take a bullet for you, but if you don't get the hell out of this bedroom immediately, I'm going to tell Mike that you had strippers at your bachelorette party."
There was a giggle and Liza slapped her hand over her mouth, but she backed out of the room and the door snapped shut. They were alone again.
But the mood was gone. In its place was an uneasiness, a pesky tension. It was different than before but no less maddening. Ryan once again didn't know what to say, so he said the first thing that popped into his head.
"I didn't know Liza had strippers at her bachelorette party."
"She didn't. But it wouldn't stop me from telling Mike that."
"You play dirty."
"Did you want her to hang around and try and get us to talk about our relationship?"
That sounded like pure hell.
"Fuck, no."
"Then you're welcome."
Levering up from the mattress, he sat next to her on the bed. "So what do we do now?"
He had a few ideas and in most of them they were horizontal. But he wasn't fussy. Up against the wall would be fine, too.
"We straighten our clothes, wipe the lipstick off of your face, and then go downstairs and try to pretend that we weren't pawing at each other for the last fifteen minutes."
That wasn't the answer he was hoping for.
"What did you think we were going to do?" she said with a short laugh. "Just continue on? Your parents probably have a decent idea as to why we both disappeared. It's going to be embarrassing as it is when we go downstairs."
He hadn't really thought about his parents.
"I'm not really thinking straight at the moment. Too little blood in my brain cells. And please don't mention my parents at a time like this. They don't help matters."
Giggling, she stood and walked over to the mirror hanging on the wall. Snapping on the desk lamp, she fluffed her hair and tugged at her clothing.
"Does mentioning your mommy dampen your...enthusiasm?"
"Hell, yes. So stop, okay?"
She turned then, a smile playing on her kiss-swollen lips. His parents were definitely going to notice that she looked ravished.
"I'm doing it on purpose. Do you want to go downstairs with...that?" With a smirk, she pointed at his tented trousers. "You'll scare them to death."
It was good that they could laugh about this. Right?
"You have a point. Maybe we should wait a minute or two."
With her standing there looking amazing, it wasn't easy to cool down, though.
"Do you want me to help some more? We can talk about the time you jumped in that ice-cold lake in the mountains. Remember how cold that was?"
Ball-shriveling cold.
"That did it. I'm good." He stood and realized that she'd managed to get a few of his shirt buttons undone. "Let's go downstairs, make some excuse so we can get out of here, then go back to your place and pick up where we left off."
She simply laughed at him. "Do you honestly think that it's going to be that easy? Your sister is downstairs."
Shit. Liza wasn't going to let this go. They both had to walk downstairs and deal with her. She'd probably already told his parents and called a justice of the peace for an impromptu wedding ceremony.
He'd kissed Mariah and now everything was different.
He just didn't know how different. Or what this all meant.
They needed to figure it out before they faced his family. Except that Mariah was already opening the door and heading into the hallway. Too late to talk.
For a moment, he contemplated turning the other direction and sneaking out of the back door but that wasn't an option. He had to go downstairs and act confident, as if everything was normal and not a big deal.
But kissing Mariah was a big damn deal.
And he wanted to do it again.
20
Mariah didn't say much to Ryan when they joined his family out on the back terrace. She didn't say much when she bid them goodbye either. She didn't say a single word on the drive back to the apartment.
The plain truth was she didn't know what to say.
She'd wanted to kiss Ryan. She could admit that to herself. She'd been thinking about it since he'd returned to Chicago and, to be honest, their encounter in his childhood bedroom had been inevitable. There was simply too much chemistry between the two of them to ignore. It had always been there and had never dimmed, although she'd been shocked by how it had intensified. His mere touch was electric.
She didn't regret kissing him either. He was a damn fine kisser and if anything had only become more skilled since their last make-out session.
But...this was more than a kiss. This was a big deal.
It could never be casual between them and they both knew that. There wouldn't be any hooking up and then saying goodbye a few days or weeks later as if what happened didn't matter.
It did matter. They mattered. They'd crossed over a line tonight and while she didn't want to go backward, she sure as hell didn't know what was ahead. Were they both really ready to try again? She wanted a second chance with him, but it wasn't going to be easy. They had over a decade and a thousand miles between them. It would be hard work to bridge that gap.
It would be worth it, but they both had to be all in. No half measures. Watching him walk out of her life again would be too painful. It had been hard enough the first time.
To his credit, Ryan didn't try and get her to talk much, letting the silence settle uncomfortably between them. They both knew they were going to have to talk eventually but it was good to try and wrangle all the thoughts and emotions into something moderately coherent.
If he's not all in, it will be okay. I'll survive. Heartbroken, but okay. I'll move on.
Her life had been perfectly fine before he'd returned, and it could be fine again. It would be better with Ryan in it but that might not be an option.
She unlocked her apartment door and dropped her purse and keys on the kitchen counter, Ryan on her heels.
"Do you want a glass of wine?"
He shook his head. "Not really. Do you want to slap my face?"
Straight to the point. It was a relief, honestly. No circling the topic or beating around the bush. They'd just get down to it. It was the best way.
"No. Is that something you're into now? Getting slapped? Because that's not my kink."
Ryan threw back his head and laughed, which was exactly what she'd hoped he would do. It helped ease the wall of tension that had built up between them on the way home.