Harvard smiled over the menu at Aiden. “Yeah, you’re right.”
“Oh cool,” said Aiden’s random date, still looking at his phone. “Bring three spoons.”
Aiden raised an eyebrow, slightly shocked by his date’s bad manners. “You can’t just share our dessert, Tony.”
“His name is Bruce!” Neil exclaimed in the tone of one sorely tested.
Aiden didn’t even know why Neil was annoyed this time. He was glaring from Harvard to Aiden, and back again. Aiden might well have done something wrong without noticing, but he was confident Harvard had done nothing wrong. Neil was being deeply unreasonable.
“Of course you can share the sundae, Bruce,” Harvard said. “Would you like a spoon, too, Neil?”
“I absolutely wouldn’t!”
Aiden was completely at a loss. Who hated brownie sundaes? What kind of person had Harvard brought into their lives?
Neil visibly made the decision to shake off his gloom, and gave Harvard a smile that made Aiden feel unwell. “Why don’t you share a dessert with me?”
“I already said I’d share a dessert with Aiden,” said Harvard, and then brightened. “I guess I could go for two halves of different desserts.…”
Neil looked dissatisfied with this genius solution. Harvard bit his lip. Aiden’s date was raising his eyebrows at his phone.
The server’s brow crumpled in confusion. “Sorry, how many spoons do you guys need?”
“Many spoons! We need so many spoons! Could you just bring us a lot of spoons and we’ll sort it out later?” Harvard sounded rather frayed.
Harvard never usually sounded frayed. Harvard’s patience was normally infinite.
Aiden had to salvage this double date somehow. He tried his charm offensive, though Neil seemed significantly less affected than he had been five minutes ago.
“Lots of desserts is always the answer, don’t you think, Neil? The great thing about mine and Charles Xavier’s relationship—”
“BRUCE!” snapped Neil.
“Leave me out of this,” muttered Aiden’s random date, texting away.
“The great thing about mine and Quill’s relationship is that he’s always so sweet.”
“Uh-huh,” said Aiden’s date.
“That’s what I think about Neil.” Harvard’s voice was lovely and soothing. “I guess I don’t know how he feels about me.”
Oh God, was this Harvard flirting? He was good at it. Aiden wanted to throw up. He kept smiling.
Neil relaxed, tipped his head, and regarded Harvard with a delighted proprietary air, as though he thought Harvard was really cute and belonged to him. “Oh, you’re all right.”
Neil leaned toward Harvard, and Harvard inclined his body slightly toward Neil’s.
Wow, get a room, thought Aiden. Then: Wait, please don’t.
Neil’s hand was clenched in a fist on the tabletop. Harvard reached out hesitantly and turned Neil’s hand palm up, lacing their fingers together. Neil nudged Harvard in a forgiving manner.
Aiden didn’t see why some couples had to revolt the populace with frenzied displays of public affection.
No, Harvard had a right to hold his boyfriend’s hand in public. Aiden supported him. Actually, Aiden liked displays of public affection himself. Aiden leaned sensuously into his date’s side and nibbled his date’s ear.
His date almost dropped his phone.
“You just bit my ear much too hard!” exclaimed Aiden’s random date.
Aiden rolled his eyes. “Excuse me for being spontaneous and romantic, Thor!”
“Bruce,” murmured Harvard.
“I could actually get into being called Thor,” said Aiden’s random date. “However, I don’t want a pierced ear. Let’s be clear on that.”
The server brought their food and a dozen spoons. Neil glared at his club sandwich.
“Do you often have to remind Aiden of his dates’ names?” Neil asked.
“Um, yeah,” Harvard admitted.
“Doesn’t that bother you?”
“Not really,” said Harvard. “He always remembers mine.”
Aiden winked at him. “Do I, Harley?”
Harvard threw back his head and laughed. Suddenly, Aiden felt less sick. Harvard was regarding Aiden in his usual warm way, knowing Aiden was incorrigible and embracing that in an ocean of endless affection. With Harvard, and only with Harvard, sometimes being who Aiden was seemed like it could be enough. Aiden’s smile began, for the first time since they’d walked into the diner, to be real.
Until Aiden noticed Neil was looking at them both with that sour expression. Again.
“You know… I’m not feeling that well,” said Neil. “Maybe tonight’s a wash. We still on for bowling on Saturday?”
“Sure! Totally!” Harvard rushed to assure him. “Aiden, do you and Bruce want to come bowling on Saturday?”
Aiden’s random date gave a long, loud whistle.
The whistle was followed by a longer, somehow even louder silence.
“I’m leaving,” announced Neil.
He shoved Harvard, and when Harvard scrambled out of the booth, Neil darted for the door.
“Wait, no,” said Harvard. “Or at least… let me take you home. Neil!”
Harvard ran after him. Aiden wondered if he should go after Harvard, but his random date was in the way. The random date seemed absorbed by his phone, and not inclined to move.
After a time, Aiden began to drum his fingers against the surface of the table.
“Sooo,” said Aiden’s random date. “In love with Harvard, huh?”
“Why would you say that, Steve?” Aiden snarled.
“Because I’ve been here this whole time,” said the random date. “Though I feel people watching from space may also know. How long has that been going on?”
Aiden looked around for Harvard and saw only milkshakes.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about, Barry!”
“That long, huh?” said Aiden’s random date. “So everyone else at Kings Row got ‘drowning thoughts of your unattainable love in sexy debauchery,’ and I got ‘incredibly awkward double date’?” He sighed. “Figures.”
There was a pause. Aiden glanced over at Bruce’s profile. Bruce didn’t look up from his phone.
Aiden didn’t actively care about his dates, but he didn’t want them to have a genuinely terrible time. He didn’t want to hurt people like his dad did. Not really.
“Sorry,” mumbled Aiden.
“Oh, don’t be,” said Bruce in mellow tones, waving his phone to illustrate why. “I’ve been commenting live on this whole date as it unfolded. Got a lot of new followers.”
Aiden cracked a smile. “Good for you.”
“When life gives you lemons, post a bitter tirade on social media, I always say!” Bruce put away his phone. “Anyway, I figure you’ll pay for all of this when your roommate comes home after getting dumped.”
“He’s not getting dumped!”
“I’d give it fifty-fifty,” said Bruce. “Anyway, bye. It’s been real, Aiden. Real weird.”
“Later, Rocket,” Aiden said, and Bruce grinned. Aiden didn’t grin back. Aiden had been faking a smile throughout the double date. Aiden found that at the end of this disaster, he could no longer manage to even pretend.