“Will Jai be okay?” Gideon asked, steering the conversation away from the uncomfortable topic of their relationships.
“Honestly, I don’t know. I’m hoping the weakness of the bond will work in his favor and lessen the ‘withdrawal.’” Uriel curled his fingers to make air quotes. “But if we want to use the bond to our advantage, Jai will have to try to strengthen it as best he can from his side.”
“Because we can use it to find Riley, right?” Noel glanced at Gideon. “Committeds can find each other and communicate and stuff, right?”
Gideon pointed at Uriel. “Ask him. He’s the only one in this room with Committeds.”
With another exaggerated eye roll, Noel turned back to Uriel, who offered a weary smile. “As bonds grow and strengthen, yes, it’s possible to communicate and track each other. Similar to the way you can feel Jai, Jai should be able to feel Riley. It’s different, but similar. But their bond isn’t strong enough for that. And for all we know, Riley is completely unaware of the connection.”
“But it could work?”
When Uriel did nothing but shrug again, Noel tore at his sloppy braid, retwisting his hair into a bun at the base of his neck. The scars highest on his back stretched uncomfortably with the movement, and he winced. He reached behind him and rubbed the thickest ones absently. He’d forgotten his pain medication in the mortal realm.
“For now, let him sleep.” Uriel passed the couch and patted the top of Noel’s head in a way he should have found condescending. Uriel did the same to Gideon’s arm before heading toward the front door. “I’m going to stop at the Archives and visit Delilah. Maybe she’s read something about unsealed or incomplete bonds. Might as well know everything we can on the subject.”
“Thank you,” Gideon said as Uriel hovered on the threshold. “And not just for your assistance with Jai. We appreciate everything you’re doing for Riley. He held you in very high esteem.”
At the sound of Riley’s name, Uriel cringed, and his eyes glossed over. “He’s a good kid. I’ll do everything I can to bring him home.”
Without another word, Uriel ducked out of the apartment and shut the door behind him. Gideon seemed to fold in on himself, like a deflating balloon. It hurt Noel’s heart to see his Prime so defeated. Gideon resisted the hold Riley had over him, protesting the connection out of fear and insecurity, but it was impossible not to see how much he loved their boy. It wasn’t the same way Noel loved Riley, but it was love all the same.
It was why they needed Riley back so badly. If Riley was lost to them forever, Noel feared Gideon wouldn’t survive the loss—none of them would. Riley was the glue holding them all together. Without him, they’d break.
Noel couldn’t stop himself from rushing to his Prime’s side and throwing his arms around his thick waist. He pressed his cheek to Gideon’s back, surprised and relieved when, instead of shrugging him off, Gideon blanketed his hands with his own and squeezed his fingers.
“It’ll be okay,” Noel said.
“Yes. It will,” Gideon said. Then he sighed. “We should try and get some rest. We’re no good to Riley if we’re not strong.”
“Of course.” Noel released Gideon and watched as his Prime lumbered down the hallway. “Take my room. I’ll bunk with Jai.”
Gideon nodded but didn’t answer verbally. He disappeared into Noel’s room and shut the door quietly behind him. Noel’s strength dissolved, and his back hit the wall with a dull thump. Sliding down to his ass on the carpet, he hid his face in his hands.
He should have gone to Jai, to comfort him, to help him. To do… something! But he just sat there and fought off tears. He couldn’t rescue the boy who held his heart. He couldn’t protect the man who owned his soul. He couldn’t do anything.
Noel had never felt so helpless in his very long life.
Chapter Four
The water was cold. So fucking cold. Riley curled into a ball, body trembling as the ice floated around his malnourished frame. He was fourteen years old, all knobby elbows and knees. He pressed his face to his kneecaps as he shuddered and sobbed.
The witch was in her bedroom, folding laundry of all things. Noel sat across from Jai, skin pebbled with goosebumps. Jai sat behind Riley, trying not to shake as ice clinked against his flesh.
“This is fucked up,” Jai spat as he laid a hand on Riley’s bare spine. The kid’s skin was almost as cold as the water.
“His lips are turning blue.” Noel blinked away tears as he ran a hand through Riley’s hair.
“We should do something.”
“We can’t. The Council said—”
“Fuck the Council! She’s going to drown him if she doesn’t freeze him first.” Jai rubbed Riley’s arms, trying to infuse warmth into his muscles. Their ward couldn’t feel them, but Jai hoped he would sense their presence on some level. He never wanted Riley to feel alone. “Noel, we can’t just watch this happen.”
Noel shivered, his own pale lips taking on a purplish hue. “I know. Gideon’s tried. They said he has to stay with her. A Thrones said so.”
“I’m sorry,” Riley whimpered into his knees. “I didn’t mean to. I’m sorry.”
“Shh, it’s okay. We’re right here.” Noel gripped Riley’s elbows, but their ward didn’t notice.
“We got you, shortstack.” Jai gripped the back of Riley’s neck and squeezed gently before glaring at Noel. “He’s our ward, and they’re refusing to let us protect him. It’s fucking bullshit.”
“I know! But what can we do?”
They stared at each other helplessly as their ward shuddered between them, trapped in a bath full of ice water.
“I want the tattoo,” Jai said later that night as Riley lay huddled under his blankets, still shivering.
Noel’s eyes widened from his seat beside their ward, his fingers stilling in Riley’s damp curls. “Are you sure?”
Staring out the window, Jai nodded. “His chemistry teacher is a creep, and Riley’s too—he won’t fight back if that asshole tries something. And Janet is a loose cannon. If the Council is stopping us from protecting him—”
“It’s for life, Jai. We can’t just break the connection if you want to later in Riley’s life. Until he dies, you’ll—”
“I know what it means!” Jai snapped, harsher than he intended. To his credit, Noel didn’t flinch. Jai released a deep breath through his nose, and the air whistled. “I know, okay? I want it. Riley’s different. He’s… important.”
“He is,” Noel agreed.
“We have to… do more. Don’t you feel it?” Facing Noel, Jai clacked his piercing against his teeth. “It’s something I have to do.”
With a nod, Noel sighed. “Okay. I’ll finish the design.”
“I want you to do it.”
At that, Noel looked shocked. “Me? I only took classes for fun. I’ve never even worked in a shop.”
“I trust you,” Jai said, and Noel’s cheeks pinked. “I don’t want to advertise it, anyway. I mean, most people wouldn’t understand.”