Before I realize what I’m doing, the sound of the metal clanking against the shower’s glass door echoes through me as I slip back into the dark abyss of my mind. To a memory, time, a place, where John was my father… where he was alive.
“Amara,” Dad yelled to me from the bottom of the stairs. Mom was sick again, and this time it had been a long time since she had her normal break. She would go through times when she was really sick, and then times when she was okay.
“Coming…” I called out. Pulling on a sweatshirt, I shuffled around the corner and down the stairs. My eyes automatically landed on my mother. Her frail body was lying on the couch, and though she was smiling, I could see this time around the treatments had been hard.
“Amara,” she called out for me, her voice hoarse as if she needed a glass of water. Dad came to stand next to me, placing a hand on my shoulder with a warm smile.
“She’ll be okay, Amara,” he reassured me, even though we both knew reassuring would only get us so far.
“Mom…” I said breathlessly, anxiety filled my belly sloshing around with every step I took toward her.
“Hi, sweetie. How are you? How is school?” she asked all motherly, completely ignoring the big huge elephant in the room.
“Uh….” I looked back at Dad, who gave me a reassuring smile. I wasn’t sure if I should even talk to Mom about anything. One thing could cause her stress, and the excess stress would only make her cancer worse.
Her warm hand landed on mine as I took a seat against her body. Pushing the tears to the back of my mind, I tried my hardest to see her as I saw her when I was five. Happy, healthy, and vibrant with life.
“Tell me…” she said softly, her eyes smiling.
“Well, school is good, excellent even. My grades are good, and I was asked to the dance.” I went on and told her the good things she had missed out on because she was in the hospital.
“That is so good, I’m excited. Has Dad taken you dress shopping yet?” I shook my head. The idea of going to the dance was actually the furthest thing from my mind.
“No, but I will…” Dad broke in, smiling, bringing the happiness back into the air.
“Good. Make sure she gets something sparkly… and pink… It fits her…” she mumbled, her eyes glazing over. The meds must be kicking in.
“Don’t worry about her, Amara. You know how she gets once the meds start working.” Dad smiled, the warmth of it alone radiated to me as I gently lay her hand beside her and stood from my seat.
“Do you think she’ll be okay?” I asked, looking at her and then back to him. The way Mom had been acting lately made it seem like she wouldn’t make it. Though, I never would say it out loud.
“Amara…” Dad came to stand next to me, his hand landing on my shoulder as he turned me in toward his chest. Without hesitation, I wrapped my arms around him.
“I will always be here for you. I will always care for you, and I will always provide you with the things you need and want. You will always be Daddy’s little girl.”
I smiled against his chest as I hugged him a little tighter.
“Turn around. I have something for you,” he said softly as I turned around while he reached into his pocket.
Forcing myself to stay put, I waited as he placed a small pendant against my chest. It was a gold-plated heart with little words scribbled across it.
“What does it say, Daddy?” I asked with excitement and curiosity in my voice.
“It says, ‘You can always count on me.’ Things are going to get bad with Mom, but I want you to always remember that no matter how bad they get, you can always count on me. Always.” His voice cracked as he turned me back around. This time it was him pulling me into an embrace.
“Always, Amara… always.”
I allowed his words to soothe me as I took every single one of them in—and they did.
I pull myself from the memories, no longer able to digest what happened. If John was really so bad, then why did he act like he cared? All those years, he pretended to be something he wasn’t. Why?
Picking up the soap, I vigorously scrub my body, trying to rid myself of the emotions swirling within me. I want every memory of who he was scrubbed from my mind. I want Enzo gone. I want the pain to go away. It completely consumes me. I should’ve known it was all too good to be true.
My hand hovers over the door handle as I prepare myself for what I’m going to find on the other side of the bathroom door. I don’t want Enzo to be there, but I’m almost certain he will be. To make matters worse, I have no clothes. The only thing covering me is the large fluffy towel wrapped around my body.
Taking one more calming breath, I grab onto the brass knob and turn it. Exhaling, I push the door open. My eyes fall onto the man sitting on the edge of the bed. Surprisingly, that man is not Enzo.
“Jared?”
He stands up, his eyes locking with mine as he takes a tiny step toward me.
“Please hear me out. I know you’ve been through a lot, but I have to tell you something, and I’m scared that I won’t get the chance if I don’t tell you right now.”
“Why wouldn’t you get a chance?”
“Because I know you’re going to try to get away the first chance you get.” The side of his mouth tucks upward slightly. Yeah, he has a point.
“Fine. Tell me. What’s so important that it can’t wait?”
“I had to dig deep when trying to find you. I even went to my dad, which I don’t normally do for the simple fact that he normally doesn’t help me… but he did this time. Because as it turns out, you and I are more connected to everything than we realized.”
“Meaning?”
“My father agreed to help find you because you are his biological daughter.”
My face deadpans. Did he just say we are siblings? I let his words sink in for a moment, ignoring the fact that I’m standing half-naked in a room with a man who is possibly my brother.
“No.” I shake my head, finally finding my voice.
“I swear to you, I had no idea about any of this before. I had no idea I had a half-sister. My father never mentioned you before.”
“You’re making this shit up.” I’m still shaking my head profusely, my wet hair flying into my face.
“Why would I make this up?”
“I don’t know why half this shit is happening. Two months ago, I was a college student at North Woods University with a farmer as a father. None of this makes sense.” I throw my hands up in the air dramatically before wrapping them securely around myself again.
“I get it… I just had to tell you,” he lowers his head like a sad puppy dog, “I brought you food too, and I convinced Enzo to give you some space. Please just get some rest, and don’t try to leave. I promise, I’ll make sure you are protected in this house.”
With that, he turns his back to me and leaves the room, leaving me utterly confused.
I’ve never noticed it before, but I could see the resemblance. Our noses were the same, our eyes held the same warm brown, and his lips were shaped the same as mine. Even though the proof is right in front of me, there is absolutely no way I will simply believe it. I can’t trust Jared.