She sure is. Ever since I met her a few months ago, she’s randomly popped into my mind. When she crashed into me this past week, I was surprised to see her. Rumor was that Knox had taken her on tour, and they were traveling around the United States for some months.
“She’s pretty, too,” Abbie interrupts my thoughts.
“Huh?” I lift my head and look at her.
“Sutton? She’s pretty.”
“Yeah,” I shrug, tying a loop around a rope.
“Gavin,” Abbie cries out.
“Abbie,” I imitate her cry.
“You’re such a pain.” She swats my arm and laughs. “I know you don’t want a relationship, and I get it with what happened, but…”
I shake my head. “Let it be.” I leave no room for argument.
Abbie pouts but nods, dropping the subject. “Anyway, Averly and Eli wanted me to invite you over tomorrow for lunch after church. Since they haven’t really been able to leave the house much since Mason was born, they wanted everyone to go over.”
“Sounds good. What do I take?”
“Just yourself and Penny.”
“Thanks.” I smile at Abbie as she says goodbye and walks back toward the house, leaving me alone in the barn with my thoughts.
For years, I focused on staying home, raising Penny, and working. Fatherhood wasn’t something I expected to do alone, so when those circumstances changed, my entire world was flipped upside down. As a baby, I didn’t know what to do to make Penny stop crying when all she probably wanted was to feel her mother.
I shake my head and run a hand down my face, not willing to go down that black trail right now. I’ve got work to do, and it’s thanks to my uncle and dad and this job that I can support my daughter. Well, that and the fact that I moved back into my parents’ house. Without them, who knows where Penny and I’d be right now.
My family has been my rock, and now that Penny’s older, I can take her to more places and feel like I have a tiny sense of control. Thankfully, the desperately crying baby is a beautiful and smart little girl, tough as hell. When all seems wrong in the world, she smiles my way, and I know things will be all right. I never understood the love of a parent until she came into my life. I also never knew heartbreak until her mom walked out of mine.
I shake my head, inhale deeply and release the knot in the back of my throat. Ain’t no time to be revisiting the past right now.
I walk into the stable where Dusty Buckaroo is—name courtesy of my five-year-old—and climb on, ready to round up the cattle grazing the fields.
…
When I walk into my house, the sweet smell of cookies swirls around me as I inhale. “It smells good,” I call out, hanging my hat on the hook by the door and kicking off my boots.
“We made cookies, Daddy,” Penny’s excited voice rings through the hall that leads to the kitchen.
“You don’t say.” I walk in to find her and my mom eating sugar cookies with melted sprinkles on top of them.
“Hi, honey. Where’s your dad?”
I lean in and kiss my mom’s cheek before hugging Penny and carrying her. Her squeals and laughter fill the kitchen.
“Daddy! My cookie’s gonna fall,” she complains.
“Nah.” I shake my head and place her back on the counter where she was sitting.
“Dad was talking to Mark about business. He’ll be home soon.” One day, the ranch will be mine and my cousins’ when our dads retire, and I’m not sure Abbie, Emily, or Sienna will want to work it with their own dreams to chase. I’ve been working my whole life to take over the ranch, and I hope to be able to one day.
“What’s for dinner?” I ask, washing my hands before I steal a cookie from the cookie sheet.
“Cookies!” Penny cheers.
“I said you could have one before dinner, and then you’d have to wait until after dinner to have another,” my mom reminds Penny.
Penny pouts and scrunches up her nose. I’ve never met anyone with a bigger sweet tooth than her.
“Grandma’s right, sweetheart.”
“Fine.” She drops her arms and glances at the cookies with longing, as if they’ll disappear any minute now. I chuckle and hug her. When her little arms wrap around me, all is right in the world, and the sacrifice to be her father feels minimal.
“I made mashed potatoes and stewed venison.”
“Sounds good. I’m gonna shower before Dad gets here so we can eat.”
After dinner and another round of cookies, I put Penny to bed and lie next to her to read her a story. She curls into me as I tell her about the princess, which she’s made me change into a cowgirl, and the prince. In Penny’s imagination, the cowgirl saves the prince, which I fully support. Once I finish, she’s still awake.
“How was school today?” I ask.
“Great,” she sighs. “I got an A on my spelling test, and Mrs. Jensen said I’m ready for first grade,” she giggles. “Can you believe that, Daddy?”
I smile and nod. “You’re the smartest girl, and I’m so proud of you.” I kiss her forehead.
“Yeah, then Poppy will be my teacher,” Penny’s voice rings with excitement.
Thankfully, Poppy and Faith both work at the school and keep an eye on Penny since it’s her first year at the elementary school.
“She will be, but remember that when she’s your teacher, you have to treat her like that. No special treatment.” Although she still has a few months in Kindergarten, I need to remind her that Poppy is a teacher and not her friend when they’re at school.
“I know. She’s Ms. Powell at school.”
My smart little sunshine. I smile to myself and hug her. “What else happened at school?”
“Alex threw food in the cafeteria, and he got in trouble and had to go talk to the principal. I think Patty likes him, but he always behaves bad.”
“Remember, sometimes people want attention any way they can get it,” I tell Penny. Rumor has it, Alex’s parents are splitting up, which I’m sure is the cause for his misbehavior.
“Yeah. Oh, next week we’re going to do a science experment to make ice cream.” Penny’s voice rises with excitement.
“An ex-pe-ri-ment,” I repeat each syllable so she can listen to the proper pronunciation.
“Yeah, that. How cool is that? Maybe I can teach you how to make it after I learn.” Her brown eyes brighten with hope, and I nod.
“Of course, baby girl,” I murmur, my heavy eyes closing. I blink them open to try to stay awake, but Penny notices.
“Go to sleep, Daddy. I’ll tell you all about it tomorrow.” Her small hand pats my cheek, and she turns to cuddle into me. I kiss the top of her head and nod, keeping my arms around her, so she knows she’s always safe and loved, no matter what.
…
“Hey,” Averly says as she opens the front door. After church, I stopped to grab a pie from The Mad Batter, our local pastry and desserts shop, before coming over to Averly and Eli’s house for lunch.
“Hi, thanks for inviting us.” I lean in and hug her.
“Hi, Averly,” Penny waves.
“Hey, beautiful. Come in.”
Penny walks in next to me, looking around their home until she spots Abbie and rushes to her. I don’t even attempt to stop her, knowing nothing will get in the way of her and her cousin.