His threat is the first thing that makes me chuckle all damn day, but I’m not amused at all. I’m feeling pretty miserable and down.
“Yeah, like that would ever happen,” I reply. Shrugging again, I say, “Remember how I said there was something I would be telling you?”
Maybe now’s a good a time as ever to let him know about Carissa. Except now, there’s a sad ending.
Because she won’t pick up or return any of my calls.
Because she won’t text me back.
Because she’s been ignoring me ever since she took off yesterday morning.
Damn, what did I do wrong? One minute, we were both having a great time, enjoying one another—and I know for a fact she was enjoying it—and the next, she can’t leave my house fast enough.
I’m going to regret telling him the first part because I know he’s going to pick on me. But maybe, just maybe, when he hears the rest of it, he’ll end up feeling sorry for my pathetic ass. Maybe.
Max has never really taken it easy on me, so I guess we’ll see.
He nods.
“That chick you thought I was staring at?”
“The one with the amazing lips and eyes from the bar that night?”
I chuckle to myself. “Yeah, her.”
His eyes widen, and I definitely have his full attention.
“Well, I kept bumping into her… so much so, I saved her one night from her ass of an ex.”
He chuckles. “Ha, no shit?”
“Yeah. Anyway, we got to talking, and we ended up seeing one another for a bit.”
He almost chokes on his beer. “You’re joking, right?”
“Nah, man. I’m serious.”
“And you never told me till now? You ass!”
I shrug. “Yeah, well, that’s not all of it.”
“Oh, so what’s up? And why the hell are you so down about it? That chick was gorgeous. You should be on cloud nine right now.”
I let out a deep sigh. “Well, I was… up until yesterday.”
He furrows his brows.
Do I tell him all about our little evening together?
Hmm, maybe I’ll skip the juicy parts. Those are only for me… and my memory now because she’s gone.
Damn, she’s gone. The realization hits me hard. I really thought things were going so well. I really thought things were progressing and going somewhere.
I thought she could be the one.
The one to save me from my misery.
The one to help me understand that life doesn’t have to end when a loved one dies.
It’s hard to keep holding on to someone who is no longer there.
“Bro, I couldn’t even tell you if I wanted to. One minute everything is going so well, and the next, she’s in a rush to leave. I don’t know what I did or didn’t do to make her so upset.”
He places a hand underneath his chin. “Well, are you sure she’s upset with you? If you’re saying you have no idea why, then maybe she’s not.”
I shake my head. “She’s never ghosted me before. She won’t answer or return any of my calls, and she won’t text me back. I don’t know what to do.” I bring my head down into my hands and drive my fingers through my hair.
“Something doesn’t sound right. Have you tried going to see her?” he asks.
I lift my head back up and look over at him. “I mean, should I? Yeah, I’ve thought about it, but if she’s ignoring me, should I really be going to her house? I don’t know, man. Maybe I should just forget it. Maybe this is what I get for trying to move forward with my life. I’m not meant to be happy again. My time came and went when Sylvia passed.” I bring my head back down into my hands. I feel tears forming behind my eyes. How can my life be this way?
“Dude, are you kidding me? Hey, look at me, Enz.”
I move my head back up slowly and meet his gaze. I know he sees my watery eyes, but I don’t know how long I’ll be able to hold the tears at bay.
“Do you honestly think you’re supposed to spend the rest of your life alone because Sylvia passed away, way too soon?”
I shrug my shoulders. I want to look away, but Max’s stare won’t let me go.
He shakes his head. “No, Lorenzo. That’s not how it’s supposed to go. This is not how your story ends. You’re entitled to be happy and find happiness… for you and Gianna. Don’t you think she deserves a mother in her life? Sure, she’s got Mom and Marianna as mother figures, but I can guarantee you, she’s missing a mom, you know?”
“I get that, but what am I supposed to do? Shit didn’t work out, and honestly, it’s probably better this way.” I wipe at my eyes before tears fall onto my cheeks. “It wouldn’t be fair to Sylvia for me to just move on.”
“Weren’t you the one who said it would be moving forward, not moving on? You’re always going to love Sylvia, no matter what. She was your wife. She was everything to you.”
He’s right, but now I don’t want to hear any more. I stand.
“Nope, sit your ass back down. I’m not finished. We’re going to talk about this.”
I let out a deep breath and sit back down, across from him on the opposite couch.
“Look, bro. What about what’s fair to you, Enz? What about your happiness? Don’t you think Sylvia would want you to be happy and live a happy life above anything else? You falling in love and being with someone who makes you happy would be the thing your wife would want the most—even if she’s no longer here. Trust me, I knew Sylvia. We were close; you know that. I can tell you she loved you so freaking much. She would absolutely want you and Gianna to be happy.”
There’s no doubt in my mind he’s one hundred and fifty percent right. He knew Sylvia almost better than I knew her myself. They had a great brother-in-law–sister-in-law bond, and he’s right. Of course she’d want me to be happy.
I shake my head back and forth. “Yeah, I know. She would want that. But what do I do now? Carissa wants nothing to do with me.”
“Enz, do you love her?”
I shrug.
Max chuckles for only a second before saying, “Nope. That’s not going to work. You either do or you don’t. There’s no in between. If you’re not there yet, then you don’t right now, but if you are, it’s a yes.”
I don’t say anything. I just stare at my brother dumbfoundedly, not knowing how to answer.
He scratches his head and drains the rest of his beer. “I’m going to ask you one last time, and you’re going to give me a straight answer… or else.”
I furrow my brows. “Or else what? Since when do you threaten me?”
“Since I know what’s best for you, big bro.”
I smirk at him, shaking my head.
“Enz?”
“Yeah?”
“Lorenzo?”
I grimace. “Yes, Massimo?”
“Lorenzo Trevano?”
I let out an annoyed breath. “Oh my God, dude! What?!”
He laughs. “Just wanted to make sure I have your attention.”
“Yeah, yeah. You got it. Now, what the hell do you want?”
“Do you love Carissa? Yes or no?”
I take a moment to ponder his question. By no means is it a simple one, but the answer is so obvious. I’ve known it for a while.