I made hasty plans to meet up with Ace and Blaze in the afternoon so we can head up to Vegas together, then rode off towards the Lucky Star Motel. The road never seemed so winding and long. Parts of it were so dark, even my headlight barely penetrated the gloom. At those times, it felt like I was riding straight into some sort of void in time and space, and while I’m not one for superstition beyond spitting over my shoulder and cursing if a black cat crosses my path and knocking on wood when I feel the urge to, but the ominous, eerie sensation was hard to ignore. It was the exact opposite of every other time I’ve gone to visit her, including the night I almost got killed rescuing her from the Sinners’ clutches.
My stomach is in a knot by the time I pull into the parking lot of the motel. The light in the reception area is on, a station wagon, a jeep, and a small hatchback are parked one next to the other by the three rooms adjacent to Brenda’s. Clearly this place likes to rent their rooms in order.
There is no light on in Brenda’s room.
I roll up to the door and knock loudly, but by that time, I’m not even expecting her to answer. Through the flimsy curtain drawn across the window, I can see the bed. It’s neatly made. The whole room is neat, as though no one’s been there for ages. Ever.
It’s like I’ve walked straight into an alternate reality. One where Brenda never existed. I can’t face the thought so I bang on the door louder, calling her name even though I know there’s no hope in hell that she’ll open them, that she’s in there. The guy staying in the next room opens his door and scowls at me. I give him a look that shuts him right up in whatever he was gonna add to his glowering look. He wisely closes his door again. I need something to punch and I’m not picky. The pimply receptionist kid standing to the side of the office door and looking at me will do.
“Where’d she go?” I ask as I stride towards him, closing the distance in what feels like a second.
He takes a step back from me and shrugs. “She left with you the last time you were here. We kept the room for you since it was paid for. But then the maid said it was all cleaned out, and it didn’t look like you were coming back so—”
“What do you mean she left with me? Clearly, she didn’t leave with me, else I wouldn’t be standing here asking you, would I?”
The knot in my stomach has turned to pure acid and if I don’t get a sensible answer out of this kid, I can’t be held responsible for what I’ll do.
“Look, I don’t know,” the kid says, backing away again, so he’s standing in the open doorway to the office. “A group of bikers came, she left with them. I thought it was you and your friends. I don’t know anything else. I don’t want any trouble.”
I take a deep breath to try and cool the acid that’s burning through my entire body now. Did the Sinners find her and pack her away before they left? But that’s impossible. I saw all of them leave that town, and none of them turned back this way.
“When was this?” I ask, needing to be sure.
“The day before yesterday,” the kid says. “I was just leaving for my weekend off when she left with them. With you, I thought…”
“The day I was here last?” I ask.
He nods. “So I thought she left with you.”
I shake my head. The possibility that the Sinners got her is very real and very scary. But I would’ve seen her down in that town as they left today? Wouldn’t I?
Not if she was already dead, I wouldn’t.
It’s a thought that fills my mind with such blackness I can’t let it consume me yet.
“Did you see what was on their cut, what colors…”
The kin stares at me blankly.
“The cuts, the jackets they were wearing…the ones that came to get her?”
“Oh, right,” he says. “Well, they wore black leather, except one of them I think had a jean jacket on—”
“No, goddamn it, not those colors,” I snap. “The pictures on the back of their jackets, were they like mine?” I turn so he can get a good look at my cut, before realizing I’m not actually wearing it, since we’re here incognito.
I deserve the confused look he’s giving me now, though I won’t hesitate in wiping it off his face if he doesn’t tell me what I need to know soon.
“Was it a horned skull with roses?” I ask. “Is that the picture you saw on the backs of their jackets?”
He looks up, as though trying to recreate the image in his head.
“Nah, man, it was more like a crown type deal. Like gold on blue, kinda tacky, I thought. And the name was Kings MC or something like that.”
This time I’m the one stepping back and I don’t know whether it’s to prevent falling on my ass in shock or to get away from the kid so I don’t end up knocking him out because of what he just told me.
Kings MC. Monarch. The guy she was with before she got tangled up with the Sinners. She told me about him. Told me he’s the reason she’d rather not go back to Vegas just yet and certainly not alone.
But she’s a woman with a plan. What did she do? Call him to come to get her after she gave up on me ever doing what I said I would and taking her away from here?
I’m mad as hell at her for that, angrier than I’ve ever been at anyone in my life.
But at least I know where to find her now.
And after all we’ve been through, after the love I have for her that is still clutching at every thought that passes through my brain with its clawed paws, she better tell me to my face she wants me gone from her life. That she wants some fat old man more than she wants me.
I’m on the highway heading for Vegas before I’m in the moment again. I pull up on the shoulder to tell Blaze where I’m going and why. Back in the day, I wouldn’t have bothered. But the new me has grown up some.
“What are you gonna do when you get there?” Blaze asks me.
“I’m gonna walk into their clubhouse and demand to see her?”
I can literally hear him shaking his head in exasperation. “You’re gonna just demand to see their president’s woman. And you think this is a good idea…”
“Look, I gotta see her and I gotta talk to her,” I say. “I’ll be as careful as I can.”
“At least wait till I get there,” he says. “For backup.”
“I’m making no promises,” I say.
But in truth, I’m hoping the long ride to Vegas will clear my mind some. Because my plan spoken in Blaze’s level voice sounds like the dumbest plan anyone’s ever made. But I meant what I told him. I gotta see her and I gotta talk to her. Gotta. It’s a physical need as bad as hunger or thirst. And I’m not gonna let a bunch of pissed off bikers stand in my way.
Brenda
A bright beam of white light shining directly into my eye and piercing my brain like a laser, so hot it almost doesn’t even hurt, wakes me. The throbbing in my head isn’t as intense, and it’s now concentrated mostly to a point on the side of my forehead.
The light enters my other eye and this time I scream out in pain, shutting my eyes and trying to get away.
“She’s getting better, but I don’t like that it’s happening so slowly,” a man says. “That was a hard blow. I still say it’s better she gets checked out, just in case. If you want to keep her.”