Monarch’s scowling face materializes before my eyes just as he shakes his head.
But then his plump lips extend into a smile, reminding me of a slug sliding out from a field of grass. Only slimier.
“How are you, Brenda? The headache not so bad today?” he asks as he approaches the bed. In the background, the club doctor, or whoever that guy with the flashlight was is leaving the room, closing the door softly behind him.
I shrug, not meeting his eyes as I sit up in bed and lead against the headboard. That’s something I can do now without too much pain. But even that little movement makes the bed wobble beneath me like I’m on a boat or something. I doubt I could walk two steps without collapsing. But I gotta get my feet back under me if I’m gonna get away. I gotta.
“Tell me where Josh is,” he says. “I swear I’m not gonna hurt him. Or you.”
A big fat lie. His are very dark, darker than they should be based on color alone. He’s still smiling, but not with those eyes of his.
I dreamed a lot since the last time he was here. Most of the dreams were of Josh’s lifeless body hitting the dust in the lot behind the Sinners’ clubhouse.
I gotta spin him a story. A story that won’t make him kill me on sight.
“I told you everything I know, Monarch, baby,” I say, trying to coo it, but it comes out a croak. Maybe it’s because I don’t even want to coo for any man other than Colt. Or maybe it’s just thirst and sleep.
The thought of Colt brings tears to my throat, making it even harder to form words. Will he look for me? Or will he just think I left him? How will he even find me?
“He seduced me and we left,” I say, fighting the lump in my throat. All that is useless thinking now. I’m on my own here. I got no one but myself to get me out of this mess. Story of my life, but at least I’ve had a lot of practice. “That was a terrible mistake. I never should’ve left you. I’m so sorry I did. We stopped in that backward town and that’s when I told him I wanted to go back to you. He got so pissed at that he just left me there. It was only later when the Sinners dragged me out of the motel room Josh left me in that I realized he settled some sort of debt with them by letting them have me. I tried to call you, to let you know where I was and to apologize, but they wouldn’t let me out of their sight.”
He’s listening, that’s a good thing I guess. But his eyes are still very dark and glassy. It’s impossible to tell if he believes me or not. But I gave him a little piece of the truth with the story. Josh was indebted to the Sinners, as were me and Stormi. He ended up dying for it. Me and Stormi almost followed him.
“How did you even find me?” I ask. “And why didn’t you come sooner?”
I’m glad my voice is toneless and coarse from my injury and disuse, otherwise, he’d hear how much I really didn’t want that to happen.
“You two were last seen partying with Roadside Sinner's MC members,” Monarch says, his eyes narrowed suspiciously. “It took me a long time to find that out, but when I did, I came straight away. To find you strutting about, free as a bird.”
I get the narrowed eye suspicion now. How do I deflect it? Does he know about Colt too?
“I took up with a guy to get out of being a slave to that MC,” I say. “Can you blame me?”
He does, but he also understands. I can see that clearly by the sharp look in his eyes. He knows manipulation and the need to survive.
“Say that story’s true, say Josh really sold you,” Monarch says, speaking slowly and deliberately, which tells me he doesn’t believe me so a second. “Why would he just disappear?” Monarch asks.
“I have no idea. He was afraid of what you’d do if you found us,” I say. “I think that’s why he was so quick to toss me aside.”
He starts shaking his head, slowly at first, then more and more fiercely. He leaps to his feet and spins. I actually scream as he punches the columns of the four-poster bed by my head, making everything shake. I know it was my face he was thinking of, and I’m not sure why he didn’t punch me.
“You make me crazy, you know that?” he asks harshly. “What the hell am I supposed to do with you?”
I reach out and lay my hand over one of the fists he’s pushing into the mattress. It takes all my skill as a seductress to make it a warm and pleasant caress.
“You have me back now,” I whisper. “You have me right where we both want me to be.”
I’m looking at him like I want to be kissed, even though that’s the very last thing I want.
His plump lips disappear into his beard as his face contorts into such an ugly expression I close my eyes for a moment to get away from it.
Then he rips his hand from my grasp and stalks out of the room, slamming the door behind him. I have no idea what that means. None at all. I’m afraid my charms failed to work on him, but I’m not exactly sorry they didn’t. For some reason, I’d much rather stay true to Colt than whore myself out to this man again. Even if I never see him again.
24
Colt
At dusk, I’m at a gas station on the outskirts of Vegas, watching truckers pull in for the night, frazzled parents calming down their children for long enough to pump some gas and continue the ride, and couples making one last stop before hitting the bright lights and fast life of Vegas. I wonder how many will end up getting hitched there. I don’t want to wonder, and I don’t want to see them. The reminder of all I lost by not holding onto Brenda tighter feels like the slow onset of stomach flu.
I spent the day finding out where the King's MC clubhouse is and how welcoming they might be to strangers, so regret isn’t the only thing making my stomach churn. It’s helped along by all the cheap beers I had to drink at the dive bars I visited to get the info. But I know all I need to know now, and I’d be at the clubhouse having myself another cheap beer if I hadn’t let Blaze talk me into waiting for him. It’s the last thing I wanted to do, but I’ve learned to listen to his words of caution even when I least want to hear them. That’s usually when I need them the most.
Blaze and Ace pull just before nine PM.
“You’re just in time,” I tell them while they’re stretching after their long ride. “I was about to go.”
They exchange a glance, then both look at me like they’re looking at a dying man.
“It’s not the best idea to just ride into a random clubhouse and challenge the president over a woman,” Blaze says, and he’s not even being sarcastic. His voice is oozing concern.
“I was thinking,” Ace says. “Stormi knows the place, me and her can go there for a drink, find Brenda, and pass on the message that you’re looking for her.”
“I’m not about to send your girlfriend to do something I need to do,” I say, as respectfully as I can manage. “I know where the place is and I’m going there now. It’s up to you if you want to come with me.”
Blaze grabs my arm as I turn to mount my bike. “Stop it, Colt. Of course, we’re gonna help you, but we’re gonna be smart about it.”
I especially hate it when he starts talking to me like whatever he says goes, no matter what. But I also know that those are the times I really have to listen to him.