No anger. Never reproach.
“We’re healthy and right where we should be.” Closing my eyes, I inhale deeply and let it out slowly, savoring his manly scent. Javi is my home, and being close to him gives me the peace and stability I need at the moment. He centers me. Assuages and fortifies my soul. “I’m sorry for not telling you sooner, but so much—”
“I’m not upset, Muñeca. You’ve been nervous and taking on so much.” His words soothe me. Calm me of the fear I’ve been trying to fight against. “But I need you to understand that no matter what, you’re not alone. We handle this together. Everything together.”
“In sickness and health, we are one.”
“We are one.”
We’ve been here before, eight months ago when we lost our first little one. It was an accident. One of those things you can never prepare for—it’s out of your hands—and no matter how much you think what if the drunk asshole who slammed into my car didn’t drink that night, it’s useless.
Nothing changes the outcome after the fact.
He decided to drive drunk after a coke bender.
He decided to hit his wife and then leave her locked in their basement.
He made a decision that changed our lives.
But more than that, we faced the heartache on our own, while Javier made an example of the unscathed driver. He made sure the man never made it to court, killing him outside his home with an old rusty ax his wife provided.
“I love you, Javier. So much.” My voice breaks a bit, and he turns me, wrapping me in an embrace. His forehead on mine. “Please know that I never meant to hide you or our babies. Both of them,” I whisper, tasting his every exhale. Letting the tears fall, because I know no matter what, he’s my rock. My haven. “All I ever wanted was a bit of normalcy. To keep this perfect little bubble we’ve created where I’m me and you take me with every quirk.”
“I do that with pride, Mariah. You’re mine.”
“Always yours.”
Warm fingers sweep across my cheeks, clearing the traces of my emotions and then healing every fear with a kiss on my lips. Just one pec settles me. Just a simple touch to let me know he’s here.
I’m not alone. I’m loved. I’m protected.
“Are you ready to let them know?
“I’m ready to marry you again.” He tilts his head, brows furrowed, but before he can ask, I’m slipping to one knee. Our new rings are in my pocket; a special set I had made with our wedding date inscribed along with our babies’ due dates. “So will you make an honest woman of me again and renew our vows?”
“You had this planned.” Not a question. I see the small shiver that rushes through him.
“Yes.”
“Yes.”
“Yes, you will, or yes, I’m crazy.”
Javi doesn’t respond. Instead, I’m lifted off the ground and swept off my feet. He’s a determined man with a smile on his face that sends my heart into a frenzy as he rushes inside and comes to a stop in front of our family.
Everyone watches us with a smile, not understanding his erratic breathing and my goofy grin.
“We’ve been married for over three years now and I’m sorry we’ve kept it hidden. I don’t apologize for loving her, for living for her, and anyone who gives her shit will deal with me.” My face heats up while silence surrounds us. I peek up and catch a few people with surprised expressions and others that look smug. My aunt and uncle look smug. Do they know? “Now, I’m going to take my wife upstairs, thank her for giving me this beautiful life—the baby growing within—and then renew our vows. Do not interrupt, or I will shoot you.”
“Oh my God!”
“My baby!”
“Jesus, Javi,” I giggle, smacking his shoulders while those in the room begin to protest. However, one look from the man I love, and they file out and into the backyard with London leading the pack. She’s smiling, winking at me, and gives us a thumbs up before closing the door.
The music begins a second later.
Laughter seeps through the glass.
And it’s exactly how our first wedding should’ve been, surrounded by those we love. Full of happiness and... oh fuck!
“But first, you’ll choke on my cock...” Javi’s lips are at my ear, nipping and teasing with the tip of his tongue “…while I eat your pretty little pink pussy. I want your juices on my face, your release on my tongue before I impale you and watch you shatter all over again. I want your sobs of pleasure and sweaty skin. I want to worship, then fuck you until you break, and then, I do is the only thing that will slip past those lips.”
“Yes, please.” It leaves me on a moan. A breathless plea, and Javier nods against my neck.
“Your wish will always be my command, Muñeca.”
Outtake #1
I’M STANDING JUST outside of Javier’s hospital room with a man I’m all too familiar with.
I caught him here, wandering down the halls and stopping just outside this room where I have just enough space between the door’s opening to witness what’s happening inside.
My little cousin is incredible, and I smile.
“She’s always done things her way,” I say, and the man tries to answer but I push the barrel of the gun deeper against his neck. “You should be proud of the woman she is, Uncle.”
“Let me go.”
“To your death, sure.” The wedding officiant begins to speak, and I listen, taking in the goofy smiles on their faces and the way her eyes light up with laughter when he pokes her side. And while I’ll never admit this to her, hiring—arranging that first meeting with Javier has been my wisest decision to date.
He’s good to her. Has taken away the sadness that lingered in her eyes for so long after Lane and her parents betrayal.
“You need to stop this. That man—”
“Is your future son-in-law, although you’ll never meet him.”
The man dressed as a priest begins to read from his bible about love. He explains that the emotion is given freely and is honest—it’s not jealous and does not boast nor does it strike down or hurt the other person. He talks about kindness and hope. Of unity and family.
A tear falls from Mariah’s eye and she catches it before Javier notices. His eyes are on the officiant while my cousin shows a moment of weakness, of missing her family, but when he looks over and sees her frown, his concern erases all traces of hurt.
He mouths, are you okay?
And she replies, always with you.
“The rings?” the man asks, and both have sheepish grins. “You don’t have any?”
“This was a last-minute thing, and she proposed.” Javi shrugs, his grin cocky. “Ms. Mariah here stole my thunder, once again.”
“I did not. You’re just slow.”
“You two will be just fine.” He produces something from his pocket that looks like small rubber bands and places one in each hand. “Now, repeat after me and use these as place-holders. I’m sure you’ll have your real sets before the week is over.”
“Guilty.” Javier looks at Mariah with a soft expression. One you don’t see in men who hold no qualms in ending a life. Who’s itching for revenge. “I brought my parents set home with me. I’d like to use those for now.”