I hear Ricco groan, and Dez begins to look away from me. Needing him to stay with me in this moment, I close my lips over him and suck on the head of his cock before pulling off. Sliding my lips over him again, I take his length to the back of my throat. This time it’s Dez who lets out a quiet moan with his eyes pinched closed.
Since having an eating disorder in which I gagged myself, I no longer have a gag reflex at all. I use this to my advantage, taking him in my mouth and pushing down until he’s fully seated and down my throat.
With one hand, I play with his balls, rolling them in my palm as I continue to suck and lick and fuck his cock with my mouth. I feel him begin to swell and know he’s close. Keeping up everything I'm giving him, I hear him grunt my name as his pleasure slides down my throat.
Licking every last drop from him, I pull back and glance up at him. I attempt to give him a smile when his face pinches together like he’s in agony. He tries to grin back at me with his bruised-up face. “It’s okay,” I mouth. His grin spreads a little more as his dark eyes swirl with so many conflicted feelings.
But soon, our bubble pops when I hear Ricco yell through his own release and feel it hit my back. My eyes close, trying to keep my anger and tears at bay as reality crashes back in and washes over both of us.
“I knew you two had chemistry but that… wow! Does Sonny know how explosive it is?” Ricco asks as I hear him zip his fly.
His words make me feel suddenly ashamed. I know I shouldn’t, but I do.
I’m relieved when he orders the guards to return us to our normal locked-up positions and leaves the room.
Alone with Dez again, he keeps distance between us, and I hate it.
“Please don’t let this change things. I need you, Dez. Don’t push me away now,” I beg.
“How could I give in so easily? I just betrayed Sonny in the worst possible way.” He sounds so tortured and I hate it. This was my choice to do this. I didn’t give him an option.
I shake my head. “This is about survival. He knows that.”
He lets out a breath. “That felt really fuckin’ real, Ruby.”
“Because it was real. It did happen. But it was us trying to get out of this alive. It was that or something much worse. We can come back from this; anything more would have destroyed us.” He doesn’t say anything and doesn’t move for too long. So, I ask, “Will you please come closer to me so I can see your face?” He does, and I see so much torment and pain there. “Was the head at least good?” I ask, trying to break the tension.
He snorts a laugh. “How can you joke at a time like this?”
“Who says I’m joking? Maybe I want to know what you thought of my skills. Have pointers for next time? Was it good for you?” I continue.
Rolling to his side, and partially covering me like he usually does when he knows I’m cold, he gives me a small, sad smile. “Yeah. That was the best head I’ve ever had. So, thanks for ruinin’ me for anyone in the future.”
Returning his smile, we stare at each other for a while, both of us lost in our heads. Thinking about what happened. How it’s changed everything. How it’s going to affect Sonny. How in such a fucked-up time and setting something could feel so good.
“Sonny is a lucky sonofabitch. No gag reflex, huh?” he asks with a raised brow.
I shrug with a smirk, earning me the first real laugh from him since we’ve been here. I realize now how much I’ve missed the sound.
I didn’t realize it would be the first and last time I’d hear it while being held here.
The next day, Ricco stormed in and told us that Sonny had killed his head of security looking for us.
Dez was the one who paid the price for Sonny’s actions.
Ricco stabbed him in the ribs.
After that, the days got darker and harder as we got less and less food and water. Less of everything. But we also got less of Ricco, and that part wasn’t so bad.
We both became weaker the longer we were here. Soon, I accepted that I would die here. At least I wouldn’t die alone. I’d die in the arms of my best friend who was with me.
With Dez in and out of consciousness next to me, I lean over and press my lips to his. I need him to know how much I love him no matter how bleak our future looks. His lips move against mine ever so slightly, trying to kiss me back. “I love you, Ruby.” His words pour into me as he whispers his truth over me.
“I know.” A tear slides down my face, landing on his cheek. Getting as close to him as possible, I turn to place one last kiss on his shoulder. “I love you too, Dez.”
25
Sonny
I was so certain that I would walk into that house and find them. I’d be the hero Ruby is always telling me I am.
Instead, we walked into an empty house, no one inside. In fact, it looked like it had been abandoned for decades. Wanting to send a message to Ricco that I was onto him, I lit that fucker on fire and left.
Going home, I drowned myself in a bottle of whiskey, thinking about how I failed them. Her.
The next day, I got another text of a picture, and this one was of Dez beaten to a pulp, broken and bloody, shackled like Ruby had been in the previous picture. The caption read, You light my shit on fire, I beat your shit unconscious.
Going back to Shelly and her team, I haven’t let her alone, practically living in her office. Every time we get a lead and I check it out, it’s another dead end. Each day that ticks by gets harder and harder to feel in control, but I can’t give up on them.
Each picture he sends is worse than the last. Dez, Ruby, both of them together. I know they’re doing what they need to, but it is killing me from the inside out. He’s there comforting her, shielding her, protecting her, while I’m here sitting on my ass and getting nowhere.
“It’s been almost three weeks. How have we not found them yet?” I ask Shelly, exhausted and frustrated.
I haven’t slept in nearly just as long, as we’ve found and searched every property known to have belonged to the DeBrava family. I’ve set fire, killed and tortured so many of their foot soldiers and known associates; each one ends with their demise and me no closer to finding my wife and best friend.
“We’ll find them,” she tries to assure me. But truth is, she’s just as tired and frustrated as I am with all of the dead ends.
Each message and picture I receive takes a little more of my soul with it. Dez looks like he’s barely strong enough to hold his head up from the many beatings he’s taken. It looks like he’s been stabbed or shot a time or two as well, and my gut twists, knowing that he’s done it all to protect Ruby.
She’s looking more and more frail, the fight and fire in her eyes dimming, her body covered in bruises and blood. I have no idea what else that sick fuck has done to her, but my imagination has run rampant with all the terrible, vile things possibilities.
At this point, I don’t know what kind of state they’ll be in, not just physically but mentally and emotionally too. Being a captured prisoner is bad enough, but add in all the other mind games and physical abuse, and there’s no telling where their minds have gone to protect themselves.
Every thought becomes a nightmare when I do doze off to sleep, which is why I’ve chosen to stay awake as much as possible, suffering in all the ways I can right along with them as I keep searching.