“I’ll come back in ten minutes,” the doctor said and practically ran from the room.
“We’ll be back when we have something,” Ky said to me, and the brothers started to leave the room. Ky paused beside me. “Don’t know if you’ve been told, but Grace had gone to the bathroom when the fire started, snuck the fuck outta the back room. Maddie must’ve realized she wasn’t there when the fire started. Grace got herself out of the building, saw the fire and ran for the exit door. That’s why Maddie was still in the clubhouse. None of the other bitches had realized Madds had left to find Grace in the fucking chaos.” Ky swallowed. He moved his hand in my direction, as though he was going to put it on my shoulder. I tensed, readying to push him away, but I stepped back before he could touch me. Ky’s hand fell back to his side. “Maddie tried to save my kid, brother. I don’t know how to repay her for that, except to find the fuckers who did this, and let you have them.” Ky left. Everyone did except AK and Viking.
“They’re back, aren’t they?” AK said, pointing to my arms. “The flames.”
I gritted my teeth and stared down at my arms. “They’re everywhere,” I said. I traced my tattoos with the tip of the knife. “They never left, never disappear. But they’re fucking boiling again. I can feel them all the time. Feel them in my flesh and in my bones.”
“AK!” Ky’s voice came from the doorway. “We gotta go!”
“I’ll be back, brother,” AK said. “I’m gonna find Smiler, then these assholes. I promise.” He paused beside me. “Keep strong. If you need me, call.” He glanced to Maddie on the bed. “You feel like the flames are becoming too much, you fucking look at your bitch and wrestle those fuckers back. Yeah? Don’t let them win. Push them back, for Madds, for your kid. They need you.” AK nodded to me, and then left. His words circled my mind, you feel like the flames are becoming too much, you fucking look at your bitch and wrestle those fuckers back. Yeah? Don’t let them win. Push them back, for Madds, for your kid… But they were already too strong to fight. They were already everywhere inside me. They had already poisoned my blood.
Viking coughed. My eyes slammed to meet his. He looked to Maddie sleeping on the bed. Then he started to leave, but he stopped and said, “I’m real fucking sorry for touching you, brother. For choking you out the other night. But I ain’t sorry for saving Madds and your kid. You weren’t letting her go. We had to save her. I know I promised I’d never touch you. You might never forgive me for breaking the promise. But I won’t regret it. You’re my brother, man. I gotta save you too.”
Viking left. I tried to keep calm. I tried to stop the fucking fire in my arms from eating my flesh, to stop the darkness from taking over. But I felt it happening. I felt my fucking mind breaking up, the devil digging in his claws. I heard snakes hissing in my ears and felt their fangs sinking into my skin. You’re evil, boy. Evil runs in your sinful veins… you killed your mama. Your evilness killed your mama. You’re a fucking retard. An evil, sinful retard…
I pulled at my hair as my poppa’s voice stabbed at my brain. I tried to breathe, but the flames were burning through the flesh of my lungs. The door opened and the doctor came back in. I forced myself to the side of the room, keeping a hand on my knife, just in case. AK told me I had to be calm when the doctors and nurses were here, so I could be with Maddie, so I could stay. I didn’t feel calm. Didn’t fucking want to be calm. I shook as I watched the doctor and the nurse inject something into one of the wires in Maddie’s hand. I had to stop myself from going over there and ripping their hands from their arms.
“Mr. Cade?” The doctor came toward me.
“Stay the fuck back,” I snarled. He stopped dead, his hands shooting in the air. My skin felt on fire. I wouldn’t let him come closer. No one was touching me. Fuck what AK said, he was gonna get a blade in his throat, if he tried.
The doctor cleared his throat. “Your wife is doing well. Her lungs are clear, breathing normally. The baby is well too. Its heartbeat is strong and the scans show it is developing well.” My cheek was twitching as I tried to hold myself back from throwing him out of the room. I just wanted him to fuck off and leave us alone. “She will wake soon. We have stopped the sedative. She may be confused at first, but that is to be expected, simply the drugs wearing off. We’ll be back to check on her soon. Call for the nurse when she wakes. There is fresh water by the bed, if her throat is dry.”
The doctor and nurse left and shut the door behind them. I stayed in the corner, keeping as far away as I could from Maddie. I never took my eyes from her, my knife running up and down my arm. I felt the flames following the blade underneath, up and down, like a magnet. Then I saw her finger move. My pulse raced, pushing the scalding blood and sin through my body faster and faster. I gritted my teeth against the evil. I just had to stop the flames enough to be sure she was okay. I just had to know she was okay.
“Wake up,” I whispered. Maddie moved her head in my direction like she could hear me. The choking feeling in my throat was back. She lifted her hand. I wanted to take it, feel her warm skin again. I balled my hand into a fist and pulled it back. I couldn’t. I stepped closer. Maddie’s eyes began to blink open. The pain in my chest got kicked into higher gear, the twisting in my stomach got fucking worse, when she blinked up at the ceiling. A fucking feral sound ripped from my mouth. Her green eyes, Maddie’s perfect green eyes. A soft moan came from her throat. I rushed forward to help her but stopped a few feet from the side of the bed. Maddie swallowed, her mouth opening as she drew in a deep breath. I tensed my muscles so nothing in me would move. A groan left my throat. Maddie rolled her head to the side in my direction. I stopped fucking breathing when her green eyes locked on me. Her eyes. Her green eyes were looking at me. I never thought I’d see them again. I never thought she would look at me again.
They started to shine. “Fl…” She coughed and moved her fingers to her throat. She rubbed the soft skin. “Flame?”
All the fucking muscles I was straining to hold back loosened and I dropped to my knees. “Maddie…”
Maddie’s eyebrows pulled down. “Wh-what? Why—” Maddie’s hand dropped to her stomach and her eyes widened. “The baby? Flame! Our baby, is it—”
“It’s alive,” I said. Tears fell from Maddie’s eyes and she squeezed them shut. She rubbed her hand across the bump. “Thank goodness,” she whispered. Then my fucking chest tore open when she started crying. When sobs left her mouth. “Our baby is alive.” My heart was beating fast, the sound of the blood and flames rushing through my veins like rapids echoed in my ears. I needed to go to her. I wanted to hold her. I didn’t like her crying. I couldn’t fucking stand her crying. She looked at me and held out her hand. “Baby, come here.” My legs wobbled as I stared at her hand. My feet were glued to the fucking floor. I gripped my hands together behind my back. “Flame?” I focused my attention on the floor. If I looked at her, I was scared I would get weak and touch her, give in to what the devil wanted. “Flame, look at me, baby.” I did, but my vision was blurred. “Baby, what is it?”