“Not a chance.” Ruth held onto Rider’s arm.
“I am happy staying with Bella and my son. But thank you, Viking.”
“Then they move close to us,” Viking said to Ky. “Their cabin is moving right fucking next to us.”
“You’ll get one with Stephen,” Styx signed to Ruth. Rider translated for her.
“Stephen?” Viking asked. “Maddie’s old man?”
“They live together, Vike. Now shut the fuck up!” AK ordered and moved toward Styx. “I gotta know if Saffie has one of those scars. I gotta get Phebe to find out.” His hand ran down his face. “She’s been through too fucking much. If she has one, if they’ve been one of the fuckers to abuse her… if they want her back… It’d fucking break her. Bitch is terrified of her own shadow.”
“I can help patrol outside your cabin,” Ash said to AK.
AK nodded. “Thanks, kid.”
“Get them a cabin near us too,” AK said to Ky, pointing to Zane and Ash. “They’re old enough to have their own place. Get one with enough room for Beau in there too. I want as many brothers watching my kid as we can. Keep Samson and Solomon close too.”
“They might not want the bitches,” Bull threw in. “They might have an issue with us.”
“Maybe,” Tank said. “But they set fire to the clubhouse when the bitches were inside. Fuckers never came for us. In fact, they dumped a body away from the clubhouse to get us the fuck outside.”
I needed to get to Maddie. I moved to the door. I was leaving. I didn’t fucking care if church was done or not. I ran to my bike. AK and Ash came running out after me. “I ain’t going back in!” I snarled. “I’m going to Maddie.”
“Styx called an end to church. This place is gonna look like Noah’s fucking Ark soon, every fucker living here at the compound.” AK nodded. “But it’s good.” He put his hand on my handlebar. “Maddie, Phebe, and the kids. Nothing can get to them with everyone watching out for them twenty-four seven.”
My stomach dropped. “I can’t lose them,” I said, picturing Maddie from my nightmare, covered in blood, Beatrix dead in my arms. “I can’t fucking lose them.”
“You won’t,” AK said. “I fucking promise. Have I ever let you down?”
“No.” AK had never let me down.
“As much as it fucking kills me, having Rudge and Edge here will be good. They’re both fucking psychos. No better people to have watching your back than people who love to kill.”
“So are fucking we!” Viking added, striding out of the clubhouse and climbing on his bike. “The fucking original psychos. The motherfucking Psycho Trio!” Vike kicked his bike to start. “And if motherfucking Stephen gets in my fucking way with Ruthie girl, he’s gonna know about it.”
“You wouldn’t fucking dare touch Maddie’s papa,” I warned.
Viking stared at me, mouth open. “Cock-blocked at every fucking turn! Why didn’t ya’ll tell me Ruth had someone already all up in her pussy?”
“Vike. Cut the shit. The jokes are over. You ain’t getting Rider’s mama. Let it the fuck go.”
“What fucking joke?”
“Yeah, okay,” AK shouted over his engine’s bike and pulled out onto the road. I followed behind, fucking cutting up road until I got to Maddie. I parked up and burst through the door. Maddie was sitting on the couch holding Beatrix in her arms. Phebe was beside them.
“Flame?” Maddie said, her eyes getting wide. I could breathe. I could breathe when I saw them. They were safe. They were safe…
AK came in behind us. “Phebe,” he said, then moved across the room and kissed her. “Where’s Saffie?”
“At home,” she said. “What is wrong?”
AK dropped his head, and then moved to Maddie. “She good?”
Maddie’s smile was so fucking big. “She is perfect.”
“Where’s my princess?” Viking asked, coming through the door. He moved straight to Maddie. “Can I?” Maddie nodded, and stood to place Beatrix in Viking’s arms. Viking smiled down at her. “Hello, Trixie, your favorite uncle is back.” I watched Viking hold her and speak to her. Beatrix never cried. I watched his hands cradle her body. He never hurt her.
My stomach tightened, aching. I didn’t fucking know why it happened, but every time someone held her, my stomach pulled tight. “No one will ever come near you, you hear? And when you’re older and boys start knocking on your door, they’ll have to go through me and your papa. Won’t that be fucking fun?” he said and kissed her cheek. “We’re gonna fucking torture their lives!”
My feet started moving backward. I had to get out of the cabin. I had to fucking get out. Then Maddie’s hand pressed on my back. “Are you okay, Flame?”
“I have to go,” I rasped, and bolted for the door, her hand slipping off my back. I burst through into the outdoors and ran into the woods. I stopped behind a tree and my fucking heart was racing. How did Vike do it? How did he just hold her like that? Viking wouldn’t hurt her. But I would. And if I hurt her, I’d hurt Maddie. I’d fucking ruin us all.
My knees gave way and I sank to the ground. My head fell forward. I couldn’t get my fucked up dreams from my head. I’d had them every night for weeks. Maddie and Beatrix were always in them. I thought of Isaiah. His dead body was always in there too. In the nightmares I always hurt them, always caused them pain just like Poppa always said I would. His slow retard of a son, who was tainted by the devil himself.
What if Maddie was wrong? The flames… the flames… my poppa’s voice was always in my head. All the fucking time. What if Maddie was wrong and Poppa was right? I couldn’t find out by holding Beatrix. I couldn’t risk hurting her.
I heard a twig snap and turned, ready to fucking fight. Ash held his hands up. “It’s just me,” he said and looked at my hand. I followed his gaze. I had a blade in my hand. How the fuck did I have a blade in my hand? “Were you cutting yourself?” Ash asked. I looked down at the blade. I didn’t even know I’d gotten hold of it. I looked at my arm and there was the red mark the knife had made. No blood, but the imprint of my fucking blade was clear to see. I dropped it on the grass and fisted my hair with both hands.
“FUCK!” I shouted. Ash sat down beside me.
He didn’t say anything for a while. Then, “You haven’t held Trixie yet?” I breathed slowly through my nose when something pulled in my gut. “She’s beautiful.” I nodded. She was. Every time I saw her face… she was beautiful, just like my Maddie.
“He was a fucking asshole, Flame,” Ash said. I lifted my head. Ash pulled out a smoke from his cut and lit up. I inhaled the smoke. It fucking calmed me. I stared over the trees. The sun was setting. How fucking long had we been out here? Ash took a long drag. “Poppa. He was fucked up. I know you don’t think like I do.” Ash didn’t wear a smile when I looked at his face. He wasn’t calling me a retard for being different. He was staring out over the trees. “I think about that asshole a lot. More than he ever fucking deserved. Do you ever realize that? He died, Flame. Fucking years ago, yet look at what he still does to us.”