‘Good.’ Milo lies back on the sand again and folds his hands under his head. I stare at his side profile for a couple of seconds then turn my face back up to the sun and close my eyes.
‘I’ve been thinking about the phobia thing,’ he says after a beat.
I tense. I still haven’t told him about the snake. ‘What about it?’
‘Danny seems convinced that they’re coming true but it’s a coincidence, isn’t it? We’re on a jungle island, there are loads of spiders everywhere. We probably have dozens of them scuttling over us when we go to sleep.’ I shudder but say nothing.
‘And Jeffers falling off a cliff,’ Milo continues. ‘It was dark and he couldn’t see where he was going because he’d lost his glasses.’
‘There was rustling in the bushes,’ I remind him.
‘We were all hyped to hell last night and jumping at shadows. It was probably an animal.’
‘That’s what I thought,’ I say.
Milo’s brow creases as he tries to read my face.
‘What is it?’ he asks. ‘There’s something you’re not telling me.’
I’m going to have to tell him. Danny’s probably told Honor by now and she’ll tell Meg, who’ll probably ask Jeffers if he saw the snake and then everyone will know apart from Milo.
I sit up and brush the sand off my hands and legs. ‘Another phobia came true.’
‘What?’ Milo sits up too.
‘You weren’t alone in the pit.’
‘What do you mean not alone?’
‘Danny saw a snake.’
His jaw drops and he stares at me with horrified eyes, unable to speak.
‘It was a cobra. But it was OK,’ I add hurriedly, ‘because obviously it didn’t bite you and—’
Milo scrabbles to his feet and heads back towards the water’s edge, his face a fury. ‘And Danny kept quiet about this?’
‘He didn’t want to scare you.’ I put a hand on his arm but he snatches it away. ‘Milo, if he’d said anything you would have freaked out. You wouldn’t have been able to move, never mind get out of the pit.’
‘Bullshit.’
‘We saw you freak out before, remember? That time at the zoo. You wouldn’t go into the reptile enclosure and—’
‘Who else knows? About the snake?’
‘I… just me. Danny said I was the first one he’d told.’
‘Yeah, right.’ He laughs dryly. ‘Everyone knows, don’t they? That’s why no one has said anything because oh no, what if Milo freaks out again? What if he cries?’
‘That’s not true.’
‘I just, I… argggh.’ He presses his hands to his face and inhales noisily through his nose. His whole body is shaking.
‘Milo.’ I put a hand on his shoulder. ‘It’s OK. No one’s going to judge you.’
He lowers his hands from his face and looks at me. ‘Well, you wouldn’t.’
‘I’m scared too, Milo. What if the next phobia that comes true is mine? And I’m not talking about vomiting.’
‘But my phobia is irrational. Yours is understandable…’ He pauses, his gaze flickering towards my hands. ‘You’ve got good reason to be afraid of fire.’
‘Thanks for reminding me.’
‘Jessie.’ Milo clasps one of my hands between his as I try to turn away. ‘I’m here for you if you want to talk about it.’
I shake my head mutely.
‘I know it’s not the same but we miss Tom too. I know he didn’t come on holiday for a few years but… we knew him, we remember him. I can’t… I can’t believe he’s really gone. I’m so, so sorry.’
I can’t speak. My throat is thick with tears. Every word Milo speaks is like a knife in my guts. I don’t want his sympathy. Not when what happened to Tom was my fault.
‘Don’t.’ Milo grabs my hand as my fingers reach for the soft skin of my forearm. ‘Jessie, please don’t hurt yourself. Talk to me.’
‘I can’t, Milo.’ I pull away and scrabble to my feet. ‘I just can’t!’
‘Jessie, wait!’ His voices follows me as I run towards the sea. It fades as I launch myself into the water, then disappears as I swim down, down, down and the sea washes the tears from my cheeks.
Chapter 24
DANNY
There’s no sign of Milo and Jessie on the new beach when Danny swims back round the rocks empty-handed. As he walks out of the sea his mind whirs as he tries to process what he just saw. Did the Brothers Grimm steal Anuman’s boots to frame Jeffers for the spiders? Have they been hiding the whole time? Creeping around in the dark and earwigging conversations? But why grab Jessie? Why not continue to hide and make more phobias come true?
But neither of the boys looked as though they’d been camped out anywhere and Jessie said all they had in their boat were a couple of day packs. It made more sense that they’d been hanging out by the hotel pool, getting more and more pissed off about what Jessie had done and decided to hire a boat to scare the hell out of her. So who did steal Anuman’s boots? Either there’s someone else on the island, or someone in the camp is responsible. But who? And why? The only people whose phobias haven’t come true are him, Meg and Jessie.
So who’s behind it all – Meg or Jessie?
He can’t imagine Meg digging a pit, capturing a snake and luring her brother towards it. Jessie then? Two years ago he wouldn’t have believed it of her but she’s changed. There’s a weird fearlessness she never used to have. Old Jessie would never have driven her chair leg into someone’s hand. But why would she decide to torture her own friends by making all their phobias come true?
Does she think they don’t care about her? Is that why she’s lashing out? He’s pretty sure no one’s asked her about her brother. He was talking to Milo, Meg, Jeffers and Honor about Tom the night before they left for the island, when they were all sitting poolside. They all felt they should say something but no one knew what to say.
I’m sorry. That’s what adults said when someone died, wasn’t it?
I’m sorry.
How the hell would that help? He said sorry half a dozen times a day at school – when he forgot his homework, brushed past someone in the corridor or accidentally stood on someone’s toe. How could those same two words be applied to someone dying? It wasn’t enough. But what was the alternative? I heard you watched your brother die. Holy shit, that’s awful. How do you go on with life after something like that happens to you? But he couldn’t say that either because it was too raw, too brutal, so instead he’d chosen to say nothing at all.
As Danny draws closer to the small patch of shade where Meg and Honor are sitting, fanning themselves with palm leaves, he wrestles with himself. Should he tell them what he suspects about Jessie or should he keep it to himself? Honor senses that she’s being watched and looks up. Her smile fades as she glances at his empty hands.
‘Sorry,’ Danny says. ‘Your sunglasses were broken.’
She shrugs as though to say never mind, then leans over to Meg and whispers something in her ear. Danny turns away, paranoia running hot through his veins. Is she complaining to Meg about him? Telling her what a terrible boyfriend he is and how she’s going to dump him the moment they get back to the hotel?