Sebastian snapped the taps off and reached for a towel, dismayed when he noticed he was already aroused again.
‘Hell on earth,’ he muttered under his breath as he wrapped the towel firmly around his waist then reached for the bathroom door.
He found Ruby sitting on the edge of the bed, her shoulders slumped, her head bowed. Her head jerked up when she heard the door open, distress in her eyes.
‘I suppose I’ll have to quit now,’ she said.
Such a prospect did not sit well with Sebastian, which was perverse, given he’d already decided it would be easier if she quit.
‘I’m so sorry,’ she blurted out before he could say a word. ‘It’s all my fault. I know it is. You tried to walk away but I wouldn’t let you. I provoked you. I don’t know why. No, that’s a lie. I do know why. I wanted you to make love to me. No, that’s a lie as well. I didn’t want you to make love to me. I wanted you to have sex with me the way you said. You know? Nothing to do with love at all. And you did. And I loved it. I really did,’ she choked out, then burst into tears, her head dropping into her hands.
Sebastian couldn’t bear it, seeing her cry like that, and accepting all the blame. He rushed over and sat down next to her, wrapping an arm around her shaking shoulders and drawing her close to him.
‘You just needed sex the same way I did. I dare say you haven’t had any for a while, have you?’
She shook her head from side to side. Was that a yes, or a no? Did he care either way? Probably not.
‘Same here,’ he said. ‘Now stop crying and let’s talk about this situation like sensible adults.’
Hopefully, he could manage that, though he suspected that what was under his towel might influence what he had to say. Thank goodness she was still wearing that T-shirt. If she’d been sitting there naked, he wouldn’t have stood a chance of a rational conversation.
Ruby looked up at him with wet eyes. ‘I need to go to the bathroom first and freshen up.’
‘Freshen up,’ he repeated before the penny dropped. He hadn’t used a condom—another one of his rules broken. Oh, God...
‘Now I’m the one saying sorry,’ he said, sighing. ‘I should have used a condom. Let me assure you that’s a first for me so you don’t have to worry about STDs. What about birth control? Are you on the pill?’
‘Yes,’ she said. ‘Though I’m not sure why. It’s been years since I had sex. Now I really have to go to the bathroom.’
He stared after her, stunned by her announcement that it had been years since she’d had sex. No wonder she’d liked it so much. Still, he couldn’t help wondering what had happened in her past to make her choose a celibate lifestyle. Especially looking the way she did. She certainly wouldn’t be short of admirers.
But he had no intention of asking her. Sebastian didn’t want to know all about Ruby’s life story. The intimacy he craved was of the strictly sexual kind. Lord, but he had to have her again. And soon.
An idea leapt into his head that seemed feasible, though very un-Sebastian-like. He was, at heart, a conventional man. And a careful one. Not that you would think so by the way he’d just acted. The idea was outrageous, he knew, but once it infiltrated his thoughts, he could not put it aside.
Would she go for it? He sure as hell hoped so.
Sebastian climbed into bed whilst she was gone, his body urging him on, despite some lingering misgivings over what he was going to propose. He would have to make it clear to her up front that his proposition was to be a strictly sexual arrangement. No emotional involvement. Just sex. And it would all end when Georgia came back.
Ruby emerged after a few minutes, looking worried. And hesitant. When she saw his towel on the floor beside the bed, her eyes widened.
‘Are you expecting me to join you in there?’ she asked him.
‘Only if you want to.’
She pulled a face. ‘That’s not fair, Sebastian. You know I want to.’
‘Then what are you waiting for?’
She walked round and climbed into the bed on the other side but kept a bit of distance between them.
‘Okay. I’m here. You said you wanted to talk about the situation like sensible adults, though I can only assume by your invitation to join you in bed that you don’t want me to quit.’
Sebastian had to smile. No flies on Ruby. ‘You’re absolutely right. I want you to stay on as my housekeeper. But we crossed a line tonight, Ruby, and I’m afraid it’s impossible for me to step back over that line. Do you know what I’m saying?’
‘Yes. You want to have more sex with me.’
‘Yes. I do. And I promise I’ll use protection from now on. What do you say?’
Her smile was small and wry. ‘I think I could suffer it.’
‘Good,’ Sebastian said, trying to keep a straight face. She really could be a saucy minx. This was some comfort, as was her admission to having had sex before without love. ‘There will, however, be conditions to this affair.’
‘Conditions?’ she asked, her frown indicating she wasn’t all that happy with that word.
‘Maybe conditions is the wrong word.’
‘You could be right there,’ she said sharply.
‘I shouldn’t have called it an affair, either, because it won’t be that. It will be an arrangement.’
‘An arrangement,’ she repeated, as though mulling that word over as well. Sebastian began to feel as if he was tackling this all wrong.
‘Look, I’m sorry,’ he said. ‘I’m expressing myself badly. But the truth is I don’t want a girlfriend, Ruby, just you as my lover. I also don’t want anyone else to know, or guess, that we’re sleeping together.’ When his conscience pricked at him, Sebastian steadfastly ignored it. ‘What do you think of that idea?’
‘Wow,’ she said, though she was still half frowning. ‘So you want me to be your secret lover?’
‘I couldn’t have put it better myself,’ he said with a relieved sigh.
‘Wow again. That’s a very daring proposition for a gentleman like you, Sebastian. I mean, you’re not a bad boy like Zack. What’s got into you?’
‘I don’t think you have to look far to know the answer to that,’ he said, and closed the distance between them. ‘You’ve totally undermined my common sense, along with my conscience,’ he added, lifting the T-shirt up over her head and tossing it away. ‘So is it a yes, Ruby?’
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
HE KISSED HER before she could answer, one hand covering her left breast at the same time. When she finally came up for air, her head was whirling.