Alex creases his brows, looking at me with narrowed eyes. “What?”
His confusion was expected, so I explain further. “I had a prenatal checkup two days ago…” Then I swallow the lump in my throat, my eyes meeting his again, and I tell him the rest. “I’m expecting twins.”
His eyes widen in shock while his lips part. “Twins?”
“But there are some complications and, um, one might not survive…” I heave a sigh, knowing I finally told him the most important and hardest part. “I’m not telling you this for you to stay with me if you don’t want to. I just want you to be present as a father. That’s it.”
Alex stares away in the void for a moment, processing everything I just told him. Then he looks back at me but his expression is just as lost as before. “You are pregnant?”
Now I’m the one frowning at him in confusion. Did he listen to anything I said or what? “Yes…”
“With twins?” he repeats.
“Yes,” I answer again in a chuckle.
“Are you serious?” Alex seems to be under a wave of shock as he remains gaping and looking at me like he’s barely here.
A laugh escapes me because I wish I could record his face right now. “I am.”
“How many weeks are you in?” he finally asks, his expression softening.
“Um, fourteen,” I reply. And since he looks so weird and lost, I add, “I have the ultrasounds in case you want—”
“You are really pregnant?”
Oh gosh! Is he okay? I nod, unsure what else to do if not confirming once more the reality. “Yes, I am.” I can’t contain the amusement in my tone at how funny his expression is becoming though.
There’s something in his gaze that switches. “Oh my God…” To my surprise, he pulls me to him, embracing me tightly. “I still can’t believe it,” I hear him saying in a whisper.
“Are you happy?”
“So much so.”
My pulse is bouncing hard at his words. This wasn’t really planned but I’m glad I told him, anyway. I’m not sure if it’s because of our past loss or not, but I can hear him sniffling, which I rarely do.
“After such a shitty week, finally some good news.”
I can’t help but chuckle as I remain in his embrace which is definitely longer than the first one.
Then as he releases me, I notice he is way more relaxed than before, so I take the plunge and ask, “And, um, can you move back home, please? Without you there, it won’t be the same.”
“I’ll be a father,” he says, meeting my eyes. “I want to be present at all the checkups, meetings, and I can’t wait to meet our kids…” His gaze goes briefly to my belly before meeting mine again. “But that doesn’t mean I’m moving back in.”
“What?” The word barely escapes my throat as my heart stops for a moment. And I gasp for air, oxygen, love, anything. I need to breathe but I can’t bring myself to. “But why?” I finally say.
“You have chosen your side.” His tone is just as severe as before, but it’s also unbothered and nonchalant. “It wasn’t my decision. It was yours.”
“I didn’t have any choice!” I bark at him. “They would’ve made me a suspect if I didn’t cooperate.”
“We always have a choice,” he scoffs. “Always.”
I shake my head because it’s not how I felt in that moment.
“You should’ve called me. You should’ve trusted me. Me—your husband. Not them!” He starts to walk again back to the door so I grab his wrist to make him stop. He turns, looking me in the eye. “Maria will take care of everything you need—”
“The only thing I need is you,” I interpose, before stepping closer to him. My eyes are on the verge of tears and I have no idea what I can say or do to change his mind. If the pregnancy didn’t, then I don’t know what else will.
“I can’t come back,” he says once more, his voice as low as a whisper. I close my eyes tight, but a tear starts coursing down my cheek, and to my surprise, I feel his lips pinning soft kisses on my head trying to soothe me. “Not until the case is over or until you stop cooperating with them.”
I wipe my tears away, my heart smashed into a thousand pieces, but I remain just as silent; Alex knows I can’t withdraw my cooperation. God knows what they’d use against me if I did.
“I love you,” he whispers. “And I want to believe we’ll get through this.” He then pauses and takes a long breath. “But for the sake of keeping my sanity, I need to be away.”
Despite wanting to persuade him once more, I don’t argue—Alex knows I will testify in court against him, he knows I’m siding with Eric and he knows I’m recording our conversation. I just hope he truly believes we can get through this as he says. I too want to believe we can. Or at least my stupid heart does.
Nevertheless, I try to get one last concession from him. “Did you know today is Valentine's Day?”
As I look up at him, Alex remains just as unimpressed. “And?”
“And can’t you at least stay here and have dinner with me?” I ask with pleading eyes and pouting lips.
His face softens with a smile and my heart parts in fury at the sight of it. “I’ll see what I can do.”
Chapter 10
Bedford Hills, February 14, 2021
Alexander Van Dieren
Pregnant. With twins.
I still can’t believe it. She told me over and over again and yet here I am still not used to this new reality; my wife is pregnant with twins. It might not be the best time for a pregnancy, but damn, I’m floating on cloud nine at the eventuality we could welcome our first kids in six months time. By then, the case should be closed and no—there’s no way in hell that I’ll end up in jail. I’m innocent and Eric knows it. That’s why he’s trying to tear me and Petra apart. He knows I had motives to kill Tess, but that’s all he’s got. So far he has no concrete evidence that prove I was the one who killed her, which leads me to believe that’s the reason why he asked Petra to cooperate with him and why he offered me that deal using the police report as a threat. He knows there’s no evidence and no witnesses.
“How are you and Petra?” my mother asks as she sips her drink, comfortably seated in front of me on the sofa. For a split second, I had forgotten I was in the trophy room with her, Yara, and Julia, to discuss some pressing subjects. I know Petra hates this place and with a security agent guarding the door, I’m pretty sure we should be left alone for the next hour.
“Like you and Dad,” I say with an ounce of sarcasm.
“Oh, that didn’t take long,” I hear Yara sniggering just as fast as she remains standing tall by the fireplace.
And as I keep playing along, I add, “The only difference is that she isn’t trying to kill me, just putting me in jail, so I guess I’m considered lucky.”
“She is?” Julia asks, furrowing her brows as she remains sitting beside Mom. “What do you mean?”
With the exception of Maud who stayed upstairs, I didn’t tell the rest of my sisters that Petra is cooperating with the prosecution, but I guess they should know what she is up to. “Petra is taping our conversations in order to find and use evidence against me.”