Every time I catch him watching us through the mirror, I look away, because I don’t want to confront the messy truth, and I’d rather drown in guilt.
Caz is a welcome distraction, and I cling to his easy loving, blocking everything else out. His lips explore mine with skilled finesse, his tongue diving into my mouth for a taste, and his wandering hands fuel the burn zinging through my body.
A few minutes later, we’re at the grungy diner downtown, and I force my libido back in its box, urging my overheated lady parts to cool down. Theo removes two guns from a plastic bag one of them must have secretly stowed under the passenger seat, handing one to Caz. “You got any spares?” I ask, regretting not removing my Glock from my bedroom before we left for school this morning.
“No. I thought you had a gun?” Theo says, tucking the weapon in the back of his jeans.
“I do, but I left it at home.”
“Probably best to have a second one in your car,” Caz suggests.
“We’ll organize that for you,” Theo adds, climbing out, and I nod.
Caz helps me out of the car, and I straighten up, pulling my top down and smoothing my hair back off my face. Caz links our fingers as Theo shoves his hands in the pockets of his jeans while looking at the ground.
A sharp pang slices across my chest as his shoulders slump, and his long blond locks curtain his face. He’s hurting, and I can’t ignore it anymore. Especially when I just made it worse.
When we were together, one of my favorite things to do was run my fingers through Theo’s hair. His head was usually in my lap, his eyes closed and his features soft as he quietly purred while I threaded my hands in his hair. The urge to wind my fingers through his hair is riding me hard, and I grip Caz’s hand more firmly to stop myself from reaching for Theo.
Things with Theo were always complicated yet simple. Difficult yet as easy as breathing. Our relationship now is no less complex, but I know I need to fix things with him. It’s no different from Galen in that regard. I can’t cause a divide in the group with me, Caz, and Saint on one side and Galen and Theo being frozen out on the other side. But even if I do patch things up with them, I still don’t see how it ends up working out. There are too many barriers to unity, especially with Theo.
I remove my hand from Caz’s. “Hey, could you give us a minute?” I gesture toward Theo.
“Sure.” He kisses my lips. “I’ll grab us a table.”
Theo lifts his head, his eyes finding mine, and I hate the anguish I discover there, because I know I’m partly responsible for it. I step toward him. “Hey.” I peer into his beautiful hazel eyes. Green is most prominent today, but his pupils are ringed in a layer of brown and amber, and I could stare at his handsome face all day. Tentatively, I reach out, cupping one side of his face. “You doing okay?”
He shrugs, looking away, and I tilt his face around with my fingers. “Don’t do that. Please.”
“It hurts so much to look at you sometimes,” he admits, his voice cracking a bit.
“I know.” I press my forehead to his, and my heart beats wildly out of control. “I’m sorry if I hurt you with Caz in the car.”
“It’s not that,” he says. “I just miss you, Lo. Miss the way we were.” His hands land on my hips.
“I miss you so fucking much,” I whisper. Tears sting my eyes, and I’m horrified. I pull back, because I can’t break down here. “Can we go to the park tonight? Just you and me. Like old times?”
His eyes turn glassy, and a soft smile graces his lips. “I would like that. We are long overdue a talk.”
I nod. “You hurt me, Theo, and I’m not sure I’m ready yet, but I want to try.”
“I want to try too, because I want to fix things with us.”
“Do you think we can?”
He shrugs. “I don’t know. I think I’m even more confused than I was back then.”
“Because of me or someone else?” I gently inquire.
His eyes pop wide. “Is it—”
I shake my head. “I don’t think it’s obvious.”
The door opens, and Caz pops his head out. “You guys coming or what?”
“Always so impatient.” Theo punches him in the arm, but he’s smiling. “We’re coming.” He reaches back, and I take his hand, letting him lead me inside.
“So, why are we eating here and not in the cafeteria?” I ask once we are seated in a booth at the back and we’ve placed our orders.
Theo takes out his cell. “I’ve uncovered some background on Taylor Tamlin, and I wanted to update everyone without prying ears. Let me call the guys.” He dials Galen and Saint in, and I sip my soda as I wait for him to begin.
“Taylor is a senior at Fenton High, and her old man is a member of The Bulls. He is also Parker’s father. Seems her old man split on Parker’s mom when she was a baby because he got Taylor’s mom pregnant around the same time.”
“What a stellar human being,” I drawl, leaning back into Caz’s side.
“He ended up marrying Taylor’s mom, and they have two more kids. He had no contact with Parker until two years ago when he reached out and welcomed her into his new family with open arms.”
“Parker didn’t strike me as the forgiving type.” I place my hand on Caz’s thigh.
“I second that assessment,” Saint says through the phone.
“I don’t know how he swung it,” Theo continues. “But she was a regular visitor to his home, and her and Taylor started hanging out together. Found a bunch of photos of them from various parties.”
“Maybe, her old man helped her fund the drug supply at Lowell High, aiding Finn in ascending the throne,” Caz suggests.
“That might be it,” Saint agrees.
“Whatever the carrot was, at least, we know that’s the connection between The Bulls and Finn’s crew. But where’s the link with The Arrows?” I ask. “Why was she invited to the party, and who invited her?”
“I think I’ve found that connection too,” Theo says, just as the waitress appears with our food. We stop talking while she sets plates in front of us, only resuming the conversation after she’s gone. “Taylor has a cousin who has an in with The Arrows. Most likely, she invited her there and, I assume, forged a connection.”
“You have a name?”
“Tempest Higgins.”
I pause with my fork halfway to my mouth. “You’ve got to be kidding me.”
“She’s Knight’s girlfriend, right?” Saint says.
“Yep. She was the one he cheated on me with.”
Theo shakes his head. “Dude’s an idiot. You outshine that ho a million to one.”
I beam at my ex, reaching under the table to squeeze his knee.
Perhaps, things are fixable, because every time he says something like this, I’m reminded he’s a decent guy and I remember how good things were between us.
Caz presses a kiss to my temple. “Dar’s fuckup was our gain.”
“I can’t believe Tempest was the conduit. Honestly, she has, like, three brain cells, and they’re all in her vagina,” I say.
Caz chuckles, running his hand up and down my arm as he pops a fry in his mouth with his free hand.