While I’m throwing my pity party, my phone dings with a new email. I check and find that it’s from Russ, Kelsey’s colleague, about my children’s book—the book I wanted to write as an excuse to be near Kelsey.
The only line that stands out is, “I’ll be taking over this project.”
Kelsey is eliminating me from all aspects of her life.
I don’t know what to think, but I know how I feel. My already fragile heart is shattering once again. It’s like she’s walking out of my life for good, and I don’t like this one bit. Instead of replying, I call Kelsey.
Five rings and my call goes to voicemail.
I hang up and press her name again.
This time, it’s voicemail right away. She sent me there.
The sound of her voice brings tears to my eyes. I miss her. “Hey, Kels, it’s me. I got an email from Russ just now. I’m shocked, but I’m also hurt. I’m not interested in doing this project unless it’s with you, so I don’t know where to go from here. Hell, I don’t know where to go at all. I miss you, honey. I love you. Please call me so we can talk. Please.”
The system cuts me off before I can make a bigger fool of myself. I stay there in the parking lot, waiting for her to call back.
A call that never comes.
TWENTY-FIVE
KELSEY
Every morning, my mom and I sit down at the kitchen table and work. I print the current manuscript I’m working on twice, and while I read, I tell Mom what to mark. It’s cute seeing her focus on making sure the proofing marks are correct, and it’s comical when we come to a sex scene. The amount of “oh, Gods” I’ve heard (and read) has reached an all-new threshold. Still, with her impeccable handwriting, she makes meticulous notes for me, which I appreciate. I’m not sure what I’d accomplish if I were in Portland. Besides, Alex is there and he’s persistent. I’d worry too much about whether he’d try and see me at work or home.
Halfway through my day, I receive an email from my old employer. They heard I was in town—and while I may be in the state, I’m nowhere near the city—and wanted to see if I’m interested in interviewing with them for a supervisory role. The position would mean more money than I make now and standard hours. No more long hours at home or working on the weekends to edit.
“Sounds interesting,” my mom says when I read her the email. “What do you think?”
“I like the idea of more money for sure, but I do love my job as an editor. It’s what I went to school for.”
“Advancement is good for a career though,” she says. “They reached out to you for a reason. I would interview for it. You have nothing to lose. Besides, you could start a family with those hours.”
“Mom!” I roll my eyes at her. She’s desperate to be a grandparent and neither of my brothers are close to settling down. Well, except for Dalton, but mom doesn’t know he’s been seeing Sophie, and I’m not sure his every other week, or whenever he’s in town, and convenient hook-up is moving toward a full-fledged relationship.
What do I know though. I’m definitely not one to offer advice on anything love related. I’m in love with a man who may or may not be having a baby with a former girlfriend he’s clearly not over.
What a fool I am.
“You should interview.”
“Why?” I ask her.
She stands and goes to the kitchen, returning with the pot of coffee. After filling our mugs, she sits back down. “I’d love to have you in the same time zone. I know I’m selfish in saying this, but having you so far away, it hurts. A couple weeks back I randomly said to your dad, ‘Let’s go see Kelsey this weekend’ except it’s not that easy. I can’t just get in the car and be there by dinner. Seeing you takes planning, and I’m not used to it. And before you bring up Davy living in Florida, I say the same thing to him. I send him job postings all the time. I get that where your father and I decided to live isn’t necessarily for you, but that doesn’t mean I don’t want my babies close to me.”
“Ah, Mom. You love us.”
“Only sometimes.” She smirks. “Anyway, I’m not trying to pressure you into making a decision one way or the other, it’s an interview, and those never hurt anyone.”
She’s right. If anything, it gives me experience and maybe a bargaining tool later on if I want a promotion with Willamette Publishing. Knowing my former employer wants me back though is a really gratifying feeling. It shows they miss me and makes me wonder if I made a mistake in moving across the country.
As if the universe knows this is going to be a struggle, two text messages pop up on my phone.
Alex Moore
Hey, Kels. I just wanted to let you know I miss you.
Tanner Pritchard
Lunch today?
“What’s wrong?”
How does she know?
I set my phone down and shake my head. “Alex misses me, and Tanner wants to have lunch.”
“Oh boy, it’s a good thing Alex isn’t here or one of them might want to pee on you.”
“Gross. You definitely needed more girls in your life,” I tell her. “You talk like Davy.”
Mom snorts out a laugh. “I can’t help it.” She eyes my phone. “What are you going to do?”
I look at it and sigh. “I don’t know. Alex . . .” Another sigh and the threat of tears make me pause. “I love him. I fell hard and fast. Of course, I never told him because he’s this larger than life pro athlete and I thought there’s no way in hell he’d want to be with mousy little me.”
“You’re anything but mousy, Kelsey.”
“I’m his little spoon,” I say quietly. “And then I run into Tanner.”
“He’s been through a lot,” mom says. “His daughter is adorable.”
“That might be the case, but he left me, remember?” I remind her. “We’d made plans and he just took this road trip and decided to stay in Texas. He didn’t even ask if I wanted to join him. He just left. It was as if he forgot about me.”
“I’m sure that wasn’t the case.”
“You’re right. He probably met the woman that became his wife.” I had always thought Tanner cheated, but never wanted to believe it. Now, I think my suspicions were right. But do I care? I’m not sure I do. Alex may have withheld the truth about his relationship with Maggie, but there isn’t a doubt in my mind that Tanner was unfaithful to me.
“Well, I can’t argue with that,” Mom says. “And Alex?”
“His ex is pregnant. The last thing he told me was he didn’t know if the baby was his or not, which is why I’ve stepped away,” I tell her. “I was under the impression they hadn’t seen each other in a while but she was in Portland a few months before we met, and they hooked up. He didn’t tell me, not that he had to, until she showed up again on his doorstep.”
“Did he know?”
I shake my head. “No, he didn’t. He was pretty shaken up and nervous about it. He says things don’t have to change but if the baby is his, I don’t want to be the reason his or her parents aren’t together.”