"This battle is already lost." I was certain of it. The Iron Legion had once again outmanoeuvred me. My army would be destroyed before long. I could not hope to fight both him and the Terrelans.
We can still beat him. There was little conviction in Ssserakis' voice. I think the sight of so many of creatures of Sevoari being reduced to body parts put the battle in perspective for both of us.
I dropped my Sourceblade and raised my right hand to the sky, forming a kinetic bubble around Imiko and myself. I infused the shield with Arcmancy as well so it would block both physical and magical attacks. It was all that I could do. The archers loosed and drew again, and arrows shattered themselves upon my shield, but Imiko winced all the same.
"Hardt!" Imiko squeaked the word and I saw the same thing she did. The Iron Legion strode past the dying Yurthammers as if they weren't there. His constructs, a metal legion of insectoid golems, continued the slaughter and kept him safe. One ambitious Khark Hound leapt for the man, but a handful of the legion rose up and knocked it aside, tearing the hound to shreds for its audacity. Hardt was clearly the Iron Legion's target and the big man was backing away slowly, hands balled and held ready.
Another volley of arrows pounded into my shield, shattering under their own force. Imiko and I watched in helplessness as the Iron Legion closed on Hardt, and his legion of golems surrounded my friend.
Hardt did what anyone would do when cornered and breathing their last few breaths: he attacked. He leapt at the Iron Legion, fist already swinging, and didn't even reach his target. Two of the constructs leapt on him, bearing him down to the ground and wrapping metal legs around his body. He collapsed, constricted and unable to move, and the Iron Legion simply stepped past him, and turned his attention to me.
"Do something!" Imiko hissed even as another volley of arrows struck my shield. I could feel Ssserakis seething inside, but even my horror knew I would not drop my shield and let Imiko die. Besides, the Iron Legion's threat was implicit. If I tried to fight back, Hardt would be killed.
"Surrender, Helsene," the Iron Legion's voice carried over the battlefield as though there weren't the sounds of chaos trying to drown it out. "The Emperor wants you alive. He said nothing about your friends."
Hardt screamed in pain as the metal wrapping him squeezed him tighter.
Choices are odd things. We make them every day without even thinking about them, but when something really matters, we often find ourselves hesitating. A delay tactic, hoping that something unexpected will happen that will take the choice out of our hands. Another volley of arrows crashed harmlessly against my shield. The Iron Legion reached down and dragged Hardt onto his knees. His face was drenched in sweat and tears and screwed up in pain. His left arm was bent at an unnatural angle and was clearly broken. Still the metal constructs clung to him, their legs pulling tighter.
"Do something," Imiko's voice was little more than a whisper.
"I do not believe he can take much more of this, Helsene," the Iron Legion's voice carried to me easily, boosted by his magic.
I lifted my left arm, as always struggling with the weight of it, and opened a portal inside my shield. It tore open with a ripping noise like wet cloth pulled apart. "It doesn't go far, but it's as far north as I can put you." I smiled at Imiko, but it was a sad smile. "I'm sorry. This is all my fault."
Imiko stared at me with wide eyes. She was shaking, sweat beading on her forehead. Fear pulsed from her in waves and standing so close she felt like a furnace. "What…"
"Get back to the city as quickly as you can. Tell Tamura what happened. He'll get everyone to safety, maybe hide them in the forest." I saw tears in Imiko's eyes and felt my own well up in response. "No one else has to die for me."
Imiko glanced between me and the portal. I was struggling to keep it open along with the shield, but I didn't rush her. I knew it would be the last time I saw my friend, and I knew how much I would miss her. I didn't want to say goodbye. "What are you going to do?"
I would have hugged her if I could have, but I needed to keep the shield up, at least until she was safe. The arrows had stopped, but I could still see the archers with their bows drawn and ready. My Khark Hounds were all but defeated, and the Hellions had already quit the battle, flying off now that they were released from any control.
"I'm not going to let Hardt die. Not for me." My voice trembled.
Imiko bit her lower lip and nodded, stepping backwards towards the portal. Tears rolled down her cheeks. "I'll tell Tamura. He'll know what to do. We'll find you."
I smiled and nodded, and Imiko stepped backwards through the portal. As soon as she was through, I snapped it shut and lowered my hand, letting my bubble disperse. I turned my attention to the Iron Legion where he held Hardt captive.
If we get in close, his minions won't be able to help. You distract him and I'll strike.
"Surrender, Helsene. You know I'm not bluffing." The metal constricting Hardt tightened even further and my friend collapsed sideways, unable to breathe, let alone scream, despite the pain. There were footsteps behind me, soldiers from the Terrelan army closing in, weapons held at the ready.
Once before, I had surrendered to the Terrelans, though not willingly. At the fall of Orran, Josef had blindsided me, knocked me down and distracted me long enough for Terrelan Sourcerers to shove Spiceweed in my mouth. This time I did it willingly, and with a little more dignity, though it is hard to retain dignity when retching so hard you burst blood vessels around your eyes. I chose to surrender, and even on my hands and knees, vomiting up my Sources and my breakfast both, the soldiers kept their distance.
When I was done, I stood and continued forward, leaving my Sources behind in the sticky grass. I crossed the distance between the Iron Legion and myself, with Terrelan soldiers following close behind.
Get us closer, Eskara. He'll let his guard down now that your magic is left behind. Get me close enough to strike.
I wiped my mouth with the back of my good hand and then held my arms out to the side as I approached. The Iron Legion narrowed his eyes and stretched out a hand towards Hardt, ready to crush him with a twitch of his fingers.
"I surrender." My shoulders slumped with exhaustion as the words left my mouth. I had been holding it together so tightly, tension stacked atop tension, but those words were an admission. I was done. The Iron Legion knew it, the Terrelans knew it, and I knew it. Years of fighting them, of running from them, of planning my revenge. It was all over. I was done. They had won.
Just a little closer.
The Iron Legion took a step forward. Hardt was still lying on the ground, in agony and barely able to draw enough breath to stay conscious. But he was conscious, his eyes fixed on me and I could see the pain there. And oddly, pride as well. The Iron Legion took another step closer.
I often wonder what might have happened had I been stronger, more capable. If I had let Ssserakis have its way. But I made a promise to myself that I would not let Hardt die, not for me and not at the hands of Loran Orran. I looked inside myself, found the space that Ssserakis inhabited within me, and walled it up, cutting my horror off from my shadow. The world around me seemed to brighten a little, the light bringing everything into sharper focus than before.
Ssserakis raged. It wasn't just the missed opportunity, our mutual enemy was so close, and I had removed any chance we had of striking out at him, but the horror resented the cage I trapped it in. Ssserakis had become used to controlling my shadow as it saw fit, a way to influence the outside world at any time. I took that away. I can't even blame Ssserakis for the rage it let loose, I have been caged enough times myself, and I have always hated my captors and found ways to fight back.