“I wanted to.” He bit his lip. There was a vulnerable honesty in his eyes that made her want to hug him. “I didn’t know how to balance my feelings for you with everything that happened with Seran. I felt like being with you would somehow betray her.”
Renna sighed, knowing exactly how he felt. “Why now? What makes you think we can be together now?”
“King Bryant. He’s the reason I’m here. His forgiveness and blessing were enough to make me realize we deserve to be happy.”
Renna wanted to be happy with Trev, but she’d spent the last six months convincing herself of why they could never be together. “Even if we put everything with Seran aside, we still would never work. I can’t be the queen of Albion, and you can’t be a farmer. I would never fit in your world, and you would always be trying to get me to. It just wouldn’t work.”
“You’d be a great queen of Albion,” he said, the sincerity in his voice saying he really believed it.
“I don’t know the first thing about being queen.”
“Yes, you do! You’re strong. You don’t let people get away with things just because that’s how it’s always been done. You fight for what you believe in, even if it isn’t popular. You care about the working-class people and bring so much perspective to those who don’t understand what it’s really like out there. You’re kind, compassionate, and full of ideas. I would be proud to have you by my side.”
Renna couldn’t believe he saw all that in her.
“Besides,” he gestured to all the transporters behind him, “there are a thousand people who will happily tell you what to do and say every minute of your life.”
She shook her head, not knowing how to get past her insecurities, doubts, and fears.
“Can we just start over?” Trev asked, throwing his hands out to the side.
“It’s a little too late to pretend like we’re just meeting for the first time.”
“No, just start this conversation over. I’m going to go back to the transporter and get out again, and you’re going to respond differently this time. You’re going to tell me how you really feel.”
“This is how I really feel.” At least a part of it, anyway. She was upset with him, but underneath it all, of course she loved him.
“No, it’s not.” He called her bluff.
“Yes, it is.” She meant to hold her ground.
“That was the anger and logic talking. It’s good we got it off your chest.” He smiled. “Did it feel good to say all those things to me?”
She bit back her own smile. “Yes.”
“Are there any other angry things you want to say to me?” He stood tall like he could take whatever beating she wanted to give him.
Renna opened her mouth to speak then shut it dramatically. She didn’t want to rehash all the pain and heartache. Trev was here, and he wanted to build a future with her. It was her turn to let go of the past. “I guess not.”
“Okay, then.” He took a quick breath. “I’m going back to the transporter, and we’ll redo the entire conversation—with you being happy to hear that I love you and excited that the love of your life has arrived.” He started jogging back to the vehicle. “And depending on how you respond,” he turned, walking backward so she could easily see his adorable face, “we’ll see if I get enough courage to ask you to marry me. Okay?”
The butterflies were back, stirring inside her. “Okay.”
“All right, Trev loves Renna, take two,” he said as he opened the transporter door, ducking inside, then shutting the door.
Trev
Trev sat against the black leather seat of the transporter and took a deep breath.
“How’s it going out there?” Drake asked from across the seat.
Trev looked at his friend. “It could be going better.”
“That’s what I gathered.” Drake laughed.
“Okay.” Trev pumped himself up. “Here I go again.” He swung the door open and stood like he had when he’d first arrived. She took his breath away again, just like she had the first time he saw her. She wore gray pants, but they actually fit her this time, making her long legs look incredible. Her shirt was loose, but every once in a while, the breeze would push it against her torso, chest, and arms in the best way. Her hair was coiled around the top of her head into a loose bun, and her skin was a golden color that accentuated the light color of her hair. He smiled again, just looking at her.
Trev slammed the door behind him and walked toward her with purpose so she was only an arm’s length away. She didn’t seem as stunned as the first time or as angry. That was a good sign.
“It’s so good to see you.” He smiled as he looked into her green eyes. “I’ve missed you in every way possible, every single day.”
She raised her eyebrows at the ridiculousness of it all.
He cupped his hands around his mouth and whispered to her, “Take two. Remember?”
Her head shook. “It’s good to see you too.” She half mumbled the words, but it was better than nothing.
“I’m sorry it took me so long to get here. I was scared, but now the only thing I’m scared of is losing you. I’ve been miserable without you.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out a folded paper. “I even started keeping a list of things I wished I could talk to you about.” He smiled big at her. “Proof that I was thinking about you.” He unwrapped the paper and began reading from its lines. “Tybolt shaved his beard. I beat Drake in a fight.” His eyes scanned down the page. “I got a new suit. King Ezra sounds weird.” He tugged at his hair. “I’m growing my hair out. I saw a cactus. Drake loves Lizanne.” He looked up at Renna to see her reaction on that one. Then he suddenly felt self-conscious and tucked the paper back in his pocket. “Well, it’s all there. You can read it later if you want.”
Her brows furrowed. “Did Tybolt really shave his beard?”
Trev knew she’d love that one. “Yeah, right off. Somehow, he looked uglier without it.”
She laughed, and he felt whole again.
For months he had been empty; even just her laugh was enough to put his heart back together.
His voice grew soft and serious. “Renna, I love you. I should have told you that the day we sat on the edge of the dock at Wellenbreck Pond because somehow, I knew it then. Or when we were in the artifact room or shooting guns or dancing or when we kissed. I should have told you I loved you when we kissed.
“We spend so much time thinking about and deciding what is essential. The last two months, that’s all I’ve done. I’ve spent all my time worrying about what is essential for everyone else. You . . .” He took a step closer, his hand reaching out to touch her face. Her skin was warm and smooth, and just like he knew it would, a surge of energy flew through his body.
“You are essential to me,” he said softly.
Trev thought he heard someone sigh. His eyes flickered to the side of the house. The plump woman seemed embarrassed she had been caught eavesdropping and quickly hid behind the stone.
She wasn’t the woman he was trying to impress with his undying love, but at least someone thought he sounded good.