“Yes.” I almost hugged him, but I stopped myself, knowing I had to keep my feelings for him under control. “Thank you for the offer, but I’ll talk to Archer. He likes Stepan, so when he hears he’s been scaring him so much, I’m sure he’ll stop.”
I went down to the kitchen to find Zarja making soup.
“Where’s Archer?” I asked.
“He’s taken to his bed. He isn’t feeling well. I’m worried, Lottie. He’s never sick.”
She was right. I didn’t remember Archer ever taking ill. “Should we call a doctor?” I asked.
“The fool won’t let me! I don’t like the look of him but I’m not sure what’s wrong. He’s got a blue touch to his mouth, which is never a good sign.”
I sat down on a stool, feeling a little odd, and I realized that the back of my head was hurting where I’d hit it on the wall of the building. The pain increased, as if it had stored itself up until I got home to take effect.
“If he’s not better soon, I’ll get a doctor or send Hap out for one,” I said.
“Yes, that’s a fine idea. Ha! I’d like to see Archer try to boss a doctor around.” She put a ladleful of soup in a bowl. “This will help him feel better.”
When I went back to the schoolroom, Dmitri was the only one who noticed me. He was back by the window, but he turned around when I came in and went over to him.
He spoke in a low voice. “Now that we’ve found Stepan, I need to go see what’s happening. We’ve been waiting a long time for this.”
His voice wasn’t quiet enough. “Who’s ‘we’?” Miles asked. “You said ‘we’ve been waiting a long time.’”
“The political group I belong to, the Constitutional Democratic Party,” Dmitri said. “It looks like we might finally have the chance to make Russia into something better, and I want to be a part of it.”
I gaped at him. I hadn’t even given a thought to Dmitri’s views, which had been stupid of me. Of course he’d have a side he supported. Every Russian did. I hadn’t heard of the particular political party he mentioned, but since it seemed like there were dozens, it wasn’t surprising I didn’t know it. I wished he’d told me about it. It was a whole side of him I didn’t know.
“Is that something men in the Horse Guard belong to?” Stepan asked. “Can I join too?”
Dmitri smiled down at him. “You can join, but it has nothing to do with the Horse Guard. All my friends from the university belong to it.”
All my friends from the university. Another side of him I didn’t know. How many more were there?
“Osip belongs to it too,” Dmitri added. “But don’t tell Archer. He wouldn’t be pleased with a footman he considered a radical.”
“Good for Osip,” Miles said. “If I had known, I would have gotten him to help me instead of lying to him about where I was going and what I was doing.”
Osip. I’d have never guessed Osip was part of a group. Everyone seemed to have a secret life I didn’t know about.
I sat down in a chair, about to lose my ability to act as if I could handle anything that happened. The day had been too much and my head was pounding. “Is that where you’ve been going at night?” I asked Dmitri. “To meetings?”
“Yes, mostly. We meet in different places. We didn’t realize this would all happen so fast. I’m not sure what is going to happen next. It will depend on what the czar does.”
Papa’s voice came from the hall. “Where is everyone?” he called.
Relief washed through me. With us all together, some of the tension eased.
He came in, and everyone talked at once. He hugged the twins, who were clinging to his legs. “Everything is fine, my little chickabiddies! I’m fine!”
When I looked at him more closely, I didn’t believe that. He was stooped over like he was too tired to stand up straight. His eyelids drooped down so that his eyes were only half open.
“Let’s let Papa talk,” I said, “after he sits down.”
Once he was settled and I’d brought him some tea, he motioned for all of us to listen. “I’ve been meeting with some people to discuss the situation. The unrest is widespread, but the czar has been notified and I’m sure he is on his way back to the city. Once he arrives, everything will get back to normal. We just have to stay calm in the meantime.”
This brought on some sharp questions from Miles. While the two were talking, Dmitri drew me aside. “I’m going now. I won’t be gone long.”
“Will you … will you check on the hospital?” All the time we’d been looking for Stepan, I’d been thinking about it. I should have tried to stop the man with the torch. I should have done something. I didn’t want to think about what I’d do if the place was gone.
“I’ll check,” he said.
“Do you think anything will change when the czar gets back?” I asked. I couldn’t see the city going back to the way it had been before.
He shook his head. “I don’t think the czar’s return is going to accomplish what the general thinks it will.”
I wanted to ask Dmitri not to go, but I held myself back. “All right. We’ll be fine here.”
“I know you will.” He smiled and leaned in close to me. “Do you know what you are?”
I shook my head, confused.
“You are the flame that keeps this house warm, Charlotte Danielovna, the flame that keeps me warm. I’ll be back as soon as I can.”
He walked out of the room, leaving me feeling as if the sudden warmth inside me were an actual fire that had been lit.
It was so late by then we were all drooping with tiredness. After everyone went to bed, I sat in my room for a while and then went back downstairs, deciding I’d wait up for Dmitri so Osip wouldn’t have to.
I took Osip’s place in the chair. I dozed off, and sometime much later a soft knocking woke me up. I stumbled to the door, surprising Dmitri when I opened it.
“You should be getting some sleep,” he said. “You didn’t need to wait up.”
“I wanted to know what’s happening.” I rubbed my eyes.
“The hospital has been badly damaged, but it’s still there,” he said. “Looters have been in, so there isn’t much furniture left.”
I think I only heard the “it’s still there” part. I put my arms around him and hugged him. He held me tight. “Thank you,” I said. We could put it back the way it was. I didn’t care how long it took, but we’d make it work again. “What about the rest of the city?”
I let go of him, and Dmitri took off his coat, brushing the snow from his hair. “Every police station has been attacked,” he said. “They are all in flames or already burned out, and any policeman the mob could find has been killed. A few tried to escape dressed as women, but they were caught. People are saying most of the known members of the Okhrana are either dead or in hiding.”
I couldn’t take in his words, so I made him repeat what he’d said and asked how he knew. After he explained, I wrapped my arms around myself, remembering the image of the men being thrown off the building. I should have felt a tremendous relief that the Okhrana were gone and Miles and I were both out of danger, but the suddenness and the sheer violence of it all made me feel twisted up inside, as if no feeling was the right feeling.