Sawyer is the one.
I think I knew it from the moment I laid eyes on him but now, because of my mistakes, I’m going to lose him.
“You ready?” he asks, knocking on the door and I jerk up and quickly wipe the tears from my cheeks as the door opens.
“Mercedes is coming to get me. I didn’t want to put you out more than I already have.”
He nods, staring at the floor. “Right.”
“Sawyer,” I whisper, more tears dripping down my cheeks. “I’m so sorry. I never meant to hurt you. I was only…”
He turns away from me. “Make sure you leave your key on the counter.”
Before I can say anything else, he disappears and I wince as his bedroom door slams shut, echoing down the hallway and I can’t help but think it sounds like the book closing on our relationship. This is it. After a whirlwind of ten days, this is all I’m left with.
My phone pings with a message.
Mercedes:
I’m outside.
Shoving my phone in my pocket, I stand up and grab my bags before leaving the key to the house on the dresser. I step out into the living room and the closer I get to the door, the more it hurts. There’s a part of me, albeit a very little part, that is hoping he will realize this is a mistake and we belong together before he rushes out of his room and begs me to stay but the closer I get to the door, the more that fantasy dies. As I grab my bag from our trip to the cabin, I turn and look back at the house before sucking in a breath and opening the door. There’s no use in prolonging the pain and the more I put this off, the harder it will be to force myself outside.
Mercedes jumps out of her car and pops the trunk before helping me with my bags, her worried gaze inspecting my face. I can only imagine what I look like right now with tear tracks dragging mascara down my face but I don’t care. Once my bags are in the trunk, she shuts it and wraps me up in a hug.
“What happened, sweetie?”
I shake my head. “Later, Mer. I have to get out of here.”
She nods as she lets me go as I glance up at the house, meeting Sawyer’s gaze in his bedroom window. My heart cracks wide open, pleading and crying for him, but he turns away from me and pulls the curtain over the window. Slipping into the car, I let out a sob and Mercedes reaches across the console to grab my hand as she pulls away from the curb.
“You’re coming over to my house.”
I shake my head. “No. Just take me to a hotel.”
“Okay,” she answers brightly. “We’ll have a sleepover. Maybe we can even go to the spa and relax a little.”
“Mercedes,” I whisper, a dull ache beginning to form in my forehead. She shakes her head and flashes me a stern look.
“You are in obvious pain and you have zero chance of getting rid of me tonight so we can go to my place or we can sleep over at a hotel. Your choice.”
“Hotel. I need somewhere that doesn’t have memories tied to it.”
She nods. “Okay. You ready to tell me what happened?”
I suck in a breath and nod. I’m not really ready to tell her but I’d rather just get it over with so I spit everything out - the P.I. crashing our date, disappearing to the cabin, someone shooting at me, and telling Sawyer the truth.
“Oh, honey,” she whispers, squeezing my hand. “I’m sure he’ll come around once he gets a chance to think it all through. That’s a hell of a lot for any person to deal with, let alone over a three day period.”
I nod. “I know but you didn’t see the look on his face. He used to look at me like I was the only one he could see, like I shined and stood out among the rest of the world.”
“And how did he look at you just now?”
“Like I was just like the rest of them,” I answer as a sob rips through me and I close my eyes. The look in his eyes as he stood in the window… it will haunt me for the rest of my life. “Do you think I should have told him the truth from the start?”
She sighs. “Yes and no. I understand why he’s hurt but I also know you were just trying to protect yourself and figure out who you are. Plus, I’m not convinced that he would have been open to the feelings you two have for each other and your connection if he had been looking at you like someone else he needed to protect.”
“Damned if I do and damned if I don’t.”
“Exactly.”
My phone starts ringing and my heart jumps into my throat as I fumble for it. I finally manage to grab it and my face falls as I stare at the screen.
“Who is it?” Mercedes asks and I turn it to show her Gavin’s name on the screen. She sighs. “Just get it over with, girl.”
Nodding, I answer it. “Hello?”
“Jules,” he breathes, relief coursing through his voice. “I’m so glad I finally got ahold of you. Where are you, baby?”
“Stop playing games, Gavin. I know you have a P.I. following me.”
He sighs. “Look, can we meet up? Maybe grab some dinner and talk?”
“No, I have plans.”
“What about tomorrow? Lunch, maybe?”
I shake my head. “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
“Juliette, please,” he pleads and a sliver of guilt slips through my armor.
“I’m really sorry, Gavin. None of this is your fault and I realize that you got put in a shitty situation but the accident changed everything for me and I’m not the same person I was.”
“I understand that. I was just hoping that maybe we could start over again. You fell in love with me once, you know, it could happen again.”
My teeth sink into my lip as I shake my head. “No, it couldn’t.”
“Why not?”
“Because I’m already in love with someone else.”
He scoffs. “No, you’re not.”
“Yes, I am.”
“It’s not possible. You just left. Two weeks ago, you were my fiancée.”
I shake my head and sigh. Maybe any other day I would be gentler and explain to him that what Sawyer and I have is just too big, too powerful to ignore but I don’t have the energy for it right now.
“Maybe I was before the accident but I don’t know you anymore.”
“You haven’t even given me a chance!” he bellows and I pull the phone away from my ear for a second before sucking in a breath. “If you did, we would fall in love all over again.”
I shake my head. “No, we wouldn’t. My future is here, in Baton Rouge. I’m sorry and I really wish you the best but this is over.”
He protests on the other end of the line but I pull my phone away from my ear and hang up. For the first time in weeks, my mind is completely clear and even without my memories, I know what I want.
“Oh, I know that look,” Mercedes says, her gaze flicking between me and the road. “What’s the plan, Jett?”
“Tonight, we’re going to eat ice cream, watch terrible movies and cry, and then tomorrow, I’m going to get my man back.”
Chapter Twenty-One
Sawyer
Sighing, I walk into the hotel and ignore the woman behind the front desk as she smiles at me, scanning the lobby for the bar Mercedes told me to meet her in. It’s tucked in the corner near the elevators and I shove my hands in my pockets as I walk over and slide onto a stool at the end of the bar.