As I stare at the papers, I swear I can feel her here with me, like she is just in the next room or standing over my shoulder with that sweet smile on her face and I shake my head. She is a ghost in my heart, pieces of her embedded in my soul that I’ll never be able to get rid of, and I have to wonder if all this dating I’m doing is pointless. Could I ever really find the kind of connection I had with Piper? Do people get more than one of those in a lifetime?
Glancing at my watch, I whisper a curse. My dinner date with Violet is in fifteen minutes and I was already running late when these damn papers caught my attention and now I’m stuck here, unable to pull myself away from her.
How fitting…
Can someone who is still alive even haunt you? She sure as hell feels like a ghost in this house and in my life but she is still very much alive. At least, I think she is. She sure as fuck was four years ago when she sent these papers. Shaking my head, I run my hand through my hair and drop my gaze to the bottom of the paper where I’m supposed to sign.
Jesus Christ.
What the hell is wrong with me?
Why haven’t I ever gotten around to signing these damn things?
Standing up, I grab a pen off of the desk and position it above the dotted line as I read over the first page. My gaze gets stuck on Petition for Divorce printed at the top and I suck in a breath, my mind going back to the same question I’ve been asking for ten years. Why?
Just sign the goddamn papers, Landry.
Get this shit over with… finally.
My heart races as I lower the pen to the paper but before I can sign my name, my phone pings with an incoming text and I drop the pen like it’s on fire before grabbing my phone with a sigh.
Violet:
Running a little late but
on my way now
“Shit,” I hiss as I turn away from the papers and grab my keys off of the counter before turning back to glance at them one more time.
Whatever.
The goddamn papers are just going to have to wait until I get back.
As I leave the apartment and walk out to my bike, I try to push thoughts of Piper and our divorce out of my mind. It would be nice if I could go on one motherfucking date without thinking about my ex-wife first. Is that too much to ask?
Climbing on my bike, I start it and some of my stress melts away as the engine rumbles to life beneath me and I check the address of the steakhouse Violet wanted to meet at before pulling away from the curb. I don’t know much about Violet since we only talked long enough to realize that we both wanted to go out and get to know each other better but she seems cool and she’s fucking gorgeous, based on the photos she had on her profile. Hopefully, this one goes better than the last or I really will just delete that damn account and say “fuck it” on the whole wife and family thing. Like I said, maybe people don’t get more than one soul mate in their life and despite it all, I still believe Piper was that for me. But that doesn’t mean that everything will work out and you get the happily ever after. And it sure as hell doesn’t mean that I have to be miserable for the rest of my life… right?
Driving through the streets of downtown Baton Rouge with the wind in my hair, I imagine what my life might have been like if I’d never married Piper, if we had just drifted apart after graduation but the more I try to picture it, the harder and harder it is to see. What she and I had… there was no way we would have just drifted apart. Which leaves me wondering yet again, what the hell happened in that six months I was gone to make her throw everything away but I know I’ll never get the answers to those questions. She made damn sure of that when she walked out of my life with nothing more than a half explanation and a shitty ass apology.
As I pull into the parking lot of the steakhouse, I pull into a spot near the back of the lot away from other cars and push my ex-wife out of my mind once and for all. Or, at least, try to. Like I said, she’s fucking persistent and if I haven’t been able to accomplish it in the last ten years, I don’t know what it will take to finish the job. But I can attempt to forget about her for the next couple hours, at least, so I don’t ruin this date. Shoving my hands in my pockets, I walk across the lot and stop next to the front door of the steakhouse, leaning back against the building where Violet and I agreed to meet. As I wait, my mind drifts back to my last date and I blow out a breath as I shake my head. Maybe I should have taken a page out of Shiloh’s book and asked Violet what she was looking for before we ever agreed to meet. The last thing I want to do is have an amazing date and see a future with someone only to find out they aren’t looking for a relationship.
Sighing, my gaze wanders around the parking lot and when I still don’t see her or the red dress she told me she would be wearing, I pull my phone out of my pocket and check for another message from her but there are no notifications.
“Wyatt?”
My head jerks up and I blink in surprise as a leggy brunette walks toward me, her red sundress swishing back and forth with the sway of her hips and her dark hair tumbling over her shoulder. The red lipstick she’s wearing conjures up images of her on her knees in front of me and she flashes me a smile.
Fuck.
She’s gorgeous.
“You are Wyatt, aren’t you?” she asks, her voice a mixture of nerves and playfulness and I nod dumbly as I push off the wall and scoff at how completely hopeless I am.
“Yeah, I am. It’s really nice to meet you.”
“You, too,” she answers, her gaze raking over me slowly before she glances over at the door to the restaurant. “Shall we?”
Nodding, I close the distance between us and place my hand at the small of her back before leading her inside. We stop at the hostess stand and a teenage girl with braces smiles up at us.
“Name?”
“Landry,” I answer and she glances down, scanning her list for my reservation before nodding and grabbing two menus from the shelf behind her.
“Follow me, please.”
Violet peeks over her shoulder, a coy smile on her face and our eyes meet. A blush creeps up her cheeks as she turns away from me and my dick takes notice immediately. Okay, this is definitely going better than the last time. The hostess leads us to an intimate little table in the back and I smile, pulling Violet’s chair out for her before taking my own seat. After the hostess hands us the menus and promises to be back in a minute with a pitcher of water, I turn to Violet.
“So…” I mutter, my brain shorting out as I try to come up with something to say. She giggles and glances down at her menu before meeting my gaze again.
“I have this theory. You want to hear it?”
I nod. “Absolutely.”
“I think if something is awkward, like first dates,” she continues, motioning between us. “Then if you just say it’s awkward, you steal its power.”
“Ah, I see. So if I just say, ‘goddamn, first dates are awkward as hell’…”
She nods. “Then, viola, no more awkwardness.”
“You know what? I think it’s working,” I tell her with a laugh, feeling my body release some tension and she smiles as she leans forward and props her elbow on the table and resting her chin in her hand.
“See? Like magic.”
“I’m impressed.”