Fiona’s voice broke into her thoughts. ‘That went well, didn’t it?’ She grinned as she packed a pile of paperwork into her bag.
Sara grimaced. ‘I’m not sure James was so happy.’
Fiona laughed. ‘Oh, that’s nothing to do with you. Well, not directly. I had to give him a bit of a bollocking, you see, for not keeping everything up to date. That’s why I made sure I got him in early, prepared the ground for making changes, so it would be easier to get him to agree to you having extra hours.’
The tension in Sara’s shoulders relaxed a little when she understood that his mood was not her fault. She followed Fiona downstairs, glad that at least she had some good news for Matt and there would be some extra money coming into the house. It’s not enough. Nowhere near enough, said a little voice in her head and a chill trickled down her spine when she thought of what might lie ahead.
Chapter Seven
Fiona had asked Sara to work the full day, instead of just the morning, as there were papers that needed preparing for a meeting. It seemed her full-time hours had started with immediate effect and she’d felt she couldn’t say no. She got home to find that Matt had tidied up, done some shopping and had a pasta bake in the oven. Ezra was asleep on the settee, and Sara bit back a comment about keeping him awake because it would be a hell of a struggle to get him to sleep later. It was going to take a bit of time to adjust, she counselled herself, and Matt wasn’t great at taking criticism. Too tired and anxious to be able to dance around any aggravation, she let it drop and wandered into the kitchen.
‘Smells delicious,’ she said, wondering what sort of mood he was in. He’d been silent and thoughtful before she’d left that morning, and snappy when she’d phoned to ask him to pick Ezra up from nursery because she was working the afternoon. But now he turned towards her with a big grin on his face. He opened his arms for a hug and held her tight, his cheek resting on top of her head as she relished the familiar warmth of him.
‘Sorry I was a bit grumpy,’ he murmured into her hair. ‘Losing my job was such a shock, and I’m still worried about how we’ll manage. But I spoke to the mortgage people and they’ve agreed we can have a repayment holiday for three months.’
Sara pulled away, looked into his smiling eyes. When did he last look at me like this? So long she couldn’t remember. Maybe the problems at work had been going on for longer than she’d thought.
‘That’s great news,’ she said, wanting to savour the loving mood, wondering if this was the silver lining to their crisis. Maybe it would bring them close again. She leant back against the worktop and caught hold of his hand, lacing her finger with his. ‘I’ve got good news as well. They’ve said I can have full-time hours at the community centre for a month. We need to catch up on everything that’s fallen behind with James being off.’
The smile fell from Matt’s face, replaced by a look of horror. He dropped her hand, took a step away from her. ‘But who’s going to look after Ezra? Childcare is way too expensive. Even the mornings he does now at the nursery cost a packet. It won’t be worth it.’ He shook his head. ‘No, I’m sorry, love, that’s not going to work.’
Sara tensed, annoyed that he was slapping down her efforts to help, to take a lead role for a change. And she’d been looking forward to being out at work a bit more, getting stuck in to some of the meatier projects they were developing at the community centre, instead of her head being filled with nursery rhymes and SpongeBob bloody SquarePants. She wasn’t ready to give that up. ‘You’re at home, though. You can pick him up from nursery, can’t you? Realistically, it could take a couple of months before you get another job.’
She went to the sink, ran herself a glass of water and gulped it down, just for something to do, to make her pause and consider her words, take the edge off her annoyance. It was all organised now and she’d feel stupid going back to Fiona and saying she couldn’t do the extra hours after all. Not when Fiona had bent over backwards to help her.
‘Actually, no, I can’t,’ he said, as if she was being awkward. She turned to look at him, the empty glass clasped tightly in her hand. He was animated, his eyes lit with excitement. ‘I’ve got a plan. It’s something I’ve been wanting to do for a while, and I’ve been doing some research and I’m pretty convinced I can give it a real go.’
She scrunched up her nose, thoroughly confused. ‘I’m not sure I know what you mean.’ She scanned his face for clues but could only see the delight shining in his eyes. ‘You’ve been headhunted? Is that it?’ Relief bubbled inside her. A seamless transition from one job to another would be the ideal solution. Maybe she could work flexitime at the community centre, do a few hours in the evenings if she had to be home at lunchtime to pick up Ezra. Her mind sped along, reshaping her life around this new scenario.
‘No, that’s not it.’ His delight morphed into frustration, his hand slapping the worktop. ‘Christ, Sara, why do you always have to jump in and second-guess what I’m about to say? Just let me speak, will you?’
She shrank back against the sink, hurt by the sharpness of his words. He could be so snappy these days, when all she was doing was trying to keep everything nice and smooth, no upsets to spook the kids.
He sighed and put a hand on her shoulder, apology in his eyes. ‘Sorry, love. I didn’t mean to have a go, it’s just that sometimes you…’ He shrugged, and his hand fell away. ‘Anyway, what I was trying to say is I’ve got a business idea. I want to set up as an IT consultant and… you’re not going to believe this, but I already have my first customer. They heard I’d been laid off.’ He laughed. ‘News travels fast and it’s such a small world, isn’t it? You know, the way this opportunity has landed at my feet, it just makes me think it’s the right thing to do. It’s a really specialised project, not many people around with the skills to do the work, and it’s perfect to get me started.’ Her eyes widened in surprise, her mind scrambling to keep up with this sudden turn into unexpected territory. He nodded, a wide grin on his face. ‘Big bucks, love. We’re talking proper money once I’m up and running.’
‘Wow. But you never said anything. How come you didn’t…’ She stopped, the narrowing of his eyes a warning that her response wasn’t the one he wanted, and having witnessed his devastation the previous day, she didn’t want to break his upbeat mood. She smiled instead, genuinely delighted that he’d found a new direction. ‘Your own business, eh?’ She reached for his hand again, desperately trying to smooth things over. ‘And big bucks, you say? Tell me more.’
His hand squeezed hers. ‘There’s a bit of a risk with it – a puzzle to solve – but I’m pretty sure I can do it. It’s exactly the sort of challenge I’ve been wanting.’ He looked so happy, so full of excitement, like a little boy who’d been given the toy he’d been hankering after but hadn’t been able to afford. ‘And if this contract works out, then who knows where it’ll take me? I just need to get set up with the right bits of kits and I’ll be off.’