“Because I know Dev blames himself for our predicament. I’ve never made him feel that way, but I’m afraid the more insular Dev becomes, the more he withdraws from me, I won’t know what to do to drag him back to me, if that makes sense.”
Samira nodded. “Perfect sense. I felt incredibly guilty, which is irrational, because medical problems happen, but I also felt worthless and helpless and a big fat failure.”
“I’m so sorry you felt that way.” Tears shimmered in Pia’s eyes. “I can imagine how my big, brave husband, who’s been a high achiever since he started school, might be feeling the same way, and I don’t want him to be self-flagellating.”
“I really think he needs to see a professional. You too, sweetie.”
“Yeah, you’re right,” Pia said, reaching out to touch her arm before heading for the door. “Thanks for the great advice as usual. See you tomorrow.”
Samira wished she could ease her cousin’s pain, but she had a feeling things would get worse before they got better. She liked Dev, he was a good guy, and he adored Pia. They were a great couple, and she really hoped they could work through their issues. It saddened her. Just as her life was looking up, her cousin’s was falling apart. But she couldn’t think about that now. She had a date to look forward to with her baby’s daddy, and while she hadn’t made any long-term decisions yet, she intended to enjoy herself for now and live in the moment.
Thirty-Five
Though Rory had signed the Renegades contract, he hadn’t seen the first payment yet, and that meant his date with Samira would be low-key. But that didn’t mean it wouldn’t be romantic. He wanted to show her how important she was to him. Every time they’d met up before this had resulted in them being in bed sooner rather than later, and while he had no complaints, he wanted to do this right.
The security guard who’d taken him up to her place several times now gave him the side-eye as he paced the foyer. She’d texted him that she’d meet him down here. He’d wanted to ask how things went with Pia, but he’d see soon enough by her expression.
The elevator doors slid open at that moment, and as he glimpsed her genuine smile, the breath he’d been unaware he’d been holding whooshed out. She looked relaxed, happy, and heart-stoppingly beautiful in a clingy black dress that highlighted her body and skimmed her curves. His gaze flicked to her belly for a moment; silly, because she was only a few weeks pregnant, but he imagined her belly swollen with his child, and he could’ve sworn his chest expanded with pride. He may be terrified of passing on his stutter to his child, but there was no turning back now. She was keeping the baby. They would be parents. He had to stop catastrophizing and focus on the positives: this woman, in his life, for however long he was lucky enough to have her.
He strode across the foyer, his heart pounding. He wanted tonight to be perfect, because three weeks away from her would be too long.
“Hey, beautiful.” He slanted a kiss across her lips, savoring the way she melded into him.
“Hey, gorgeous,” she murmured against the corner of his mouth, and he grinned as he eased away.
“You look pretty happy, so I’m guessing things went well with Pia?”
She nodded, but some of the joy in her eyes faded. “We had a good chat about the baby, but she’s going through some tough stuff with her hubby, and I’m worried.”
“You’re close, so it’s natural to worry,” he said, smoothing the tiny frown line between her brows. “But she has you in her corner; she can’t lose.”
“There you go again, knowing the right thing to say.” She caught hold of his hand. “I thought you were super quiet when we first got together, but I like that when you speak, it’s worth listening to.”
“I am quiet,” he said, as realization dawned. Usually, when he felt comfortable around someone, his chance of stuttering increased, but with Samira that hadn’t happened. In fact, in their last few interactions, he hadn’t even worried about it.
Had landing the Renegades gig given him a much-needed confidence boost? Or was there something else at play here? Had he moved beyond “comfortable” with Samira and had genuine feelings for her?
“Quiet or verbose, I like you just the same,” she said, resting her head on his shoulder. “At the risk of scaring you off, I haven’t felt so connected with a guy in forever. It’s just so easy between us.”
“Yeah, I know what you mean.”
She must’ve heard something in his voice, because she lifted her head to look at him. “I know tonight’s about having fun, but maybe after you get back from Queensland, we can discuss the future.”
“Uh-oh, the F word.” He pretended to wince. “You already said no to my marriage proposal, which wounded me deeply, for the record, so I’m assuming you mean we’ll discuss where you’ll have the baby, if you’ll stay in Melbourne, that kind of thing?”
“Yeah.” She slugged him on the arm. “And I said no because you asked out of chivalry, not undying love.”
“Can’t it be both?” He clutched at his chest. “You have no idea what you do to me.”
“That’s lust, not love.” She rolled her eyes. “And if we don’t go on this date right now, we’ll have to wait even longer to get to the lust part.”
He’d never been so tempted to say screw the date and just screw her. But he wanted to do this right, no matter how much he wanted her.
“Let’s go.”
He liked the feel of her hand in his as they strolled out of her building and into a balmy Melbourne evening. The Yarra River, visible between a nearby hotel and an office skyscraper, shimmered with the city’s reflected lights. He loved Melbourne but was looking forward to the challenge of living in a small community on set in the outback.
“You’ve reverted to quiet,” she said, swinging their arms a little.
“Just thinking about the next few weeks on set.”
“You haven’t told me much about the show.”
“I don’t know a lot, to be honest. That’s what the next three weeks are about.”
“When do you actually start filming?”
“In roughly eight weeks.”
He paused, wondering if he should tell her the rest. When he’d accepted this amazing opportunity, he hadn’t envisaged being a father or having to support her through this. With filming promising to go on for months, he wouldn’t be around much and would miss the important stuff like scans, prepping the nursery, that kind of thing. Though nothing or nobody could keep him away from the birth.